<p>You should be proud of meeting the counsellor. The 6 weeks plan sounds good. @sax has a good point about hormones - physical imbalances can really mess us up - thyroid levels, iron levels, vit D, etc.</p>
<p>I just realized that after traveling so far from home, you are probably in a different time zone so you could also be dealing with jet lag adjustments. Our body clocks being out of whack can also affect our moods a lot. Try to get morning sun every day - the vit D plus the synchronizing of your body clock will be good for you.</p>
<p>Lastly, no need to feel guilty for your feelings. Our feelings are our feelings, it’s best to accept them. How you deal with your feelings is what is important, and you are being constructive and looking for help, and that is so mature and intelligent. </p>
<p>Don’t be hesitant about reaching out to your family via text/phone/skype whatever. They are thinking about you and eager to support you, even long-distance. It will NOT be a bother to them at all.</p>
<p>“Telling her to go home and transfer is not an opinion.”- It IS just an opinion and that is exactly what OP is asking here, we are NOT trained proffessionals and it is KNOWN fact, we do not even pretend, we just share our own experiences that could be easily ignored if they do not fit specific situation. That goes for whole entire CC and not just this thread. Alternatively, we can open up discussion that is absolutely irrelevant to OP in regard to what we are trying to accomplish here…and put OP into more depression because then OP will realize that we are just a bunch of sqawking adults who do not care about anything but to squawk at each other. I know how closeness to home is important to some, my own D. told me that many times, but she is mature enough to act upon her own feelings and desires, not everybody is this way and sometime it is important to point out to the young person that their own self is the most important advisor in a world, listne to yourself before you listen to others,…that is not true though when you are ordered to eat your carrots…jut kidding!</p>
<p>@justadrizzle I would suggest making good use of Skype, text, phone, Facebook, Instagram, etc. to stay in touch with your Mom and sister. They are not gone; you can be in touch with them every day.</p>
<p>Just another parent adding, you seem very attuned to your needs and your vulnerabilities – as the parent of a student with some challenges, I am impressed by your self-awareness and pro activeness. Listen to yourself, and keep talking to your counselors. Your family loves you, and wants the best for you – but please know, that parents understand that what is “best” can evolve, and they want you to be in an environment where you will thrive. It may be your current location or then again it may not. Sounds like you are doing all the right things, listening to yourself, your body. The very beginning of school is a huge adjustment, and many of those kids who seem to be managing the transition are sobbing on the phone to parents when their roommates are in the bathroom. Trust your judgment, and keep checking in with adults/professionals on your campus. You sound like an incredible young person, and I wish you all the best. </p>
<p>Hugs to you OP. It sounds like you are very close to your Mom. Please let her know how you’re feeling. She won’t be disappointed in you. I’m sure she misses you very much too and she will be glad you’ve reached out to her for support. Every parent I know would prefer that their child confide their distress instead of hiding it and pretending all is well for fear of disappointing the parent.</p>
<p>I’m sure your family misses you a lot as well. Perhaps it would help all of you to feel better if you try to look for positive things to share with your family–stories about people you meet, interesting things you learn in your classes, a group you join, something cool on or off campus. Send them photos and little updates and let them share in your adventure.</p>
<h1>24 is correct. My kid is the one sobbing on the phone to me in her room. Every freshman around you is sad. My daughter is an introvert and the “large personalities” around her are stressing her out. I know its easier said than done, but the fact that you sought help shows an amazing level of maturity. Your mommy would be proud.</h1>
<p>My D has two international suitemates. Someone said on this stream that you are only a 5 hour plane ride from home. What if home was Greece or Australia or somewhere thousands of miles and hours away? You can always go home if you need to.</p>
<p>Also, one piece of advice from a mom. If you want to call your mom and cry, do so. She will understand. My daughter only texted me for a couple of days and appeared to be fine. I was wondering what was up, but pleasantly surprised that she was adjusting well. Then the call and the tears came. I went into mommy mode and talked her through it. Your mom is the one person that will hear you, know you and be able to help you without having to tell her the whole backstory. She will just “be” there, no questions, no comments, no judgment. That’s not to say don’t continue counseling and your plan. But please, call your mom. A teary phone call home and an over the phone hug by mommy can go a long, long way.</p>
<p>I will be thinking of you and all our homesick babies.</p>
<p>It’s going better. I haven’t really felt the need to cry for the last two days, and classes have been going well. But right now, I’m in my dorm room, by myself (i already signed up for clubs and work and all that, its just the first couple of days), and I get sad again. Night time really sucks and I don’t understand why. That was usually the time my mom and I bonded so I think that might be it. I’m feeling better, not that many more tears, but i’m still relatively sad but hiding it very well. I don’t like the feeling.</p>
<p>@justadrizzle, know that there are a lot of us here cheering for you and praying for you. You’re doing a super job by signing up for clubs and for work and for going to classes. It is great that you have felt better over the two days recently. </p>
<p>Evenings can be difficult for many, especially because one is so tired at the end of the day. School itself is tiring, too, and you really did do a lot of things today. You made it through today well and that is wonderful news!</p>
<p>As @Overtheedge, @mathyone, and @Tperry1982, said in their posts above: maybe call your Mom or text your Mom tonight with some of your news of today. You can still “bond” by sharing these new experiences. I’m sure she will enjoy hearing about what you are doing.</p>
<p>Maybe later consider working on one of your homework assignments tonight. It will help keep you on schedule. It will also make the evening go more quickly. Getting some rest will also help.</p>
<p>Working out at the gym before dinner is also a good way to increase your appetite and get some good exercise. You’ll see a lot of your classmates at the gym as well and may strike up a few conversations, especially if you go regularly. You are already paying for the facilities, so you might as well use them and get your money’s worth. You mom and little sister will be so proud of you and love to see that you are taking good care of yourself. Perhaps you can teach them some new exercises when you next see them. You can learn some from others at the gym. </p>
<p>Our S’s gym had a climbing wall, which helped inspire a love of rock climbing in S. Maybe your gym has something similar or something else you may find interesting. We parents love hearing from our kids, especially something (anything) that was new, fun, different, made them think. I’m sure they’re awfully proud of you, moving forward and growing!</p>
<p>Hey, sounds like good progress! Yep, call your mom. I know that I wish my kid would call! Though, in his defense, he has texted today.</p>
<p>Nighttimes always are the worst. In my case, it’s really early mornings … Waking up and ruminating when there’s not a damn thing to be done. Maybe you could find a new nighttime routine. Any ideas?</p>
<p>OP, you sound like such a mature young person. I know you feel like exactly the opposite right now, but let me tell you that this is what real maturity is. You are dealing with a really tough situation, one that a lot of people your age would not be able to deal with. You’re not weak for having these emotions – you’re strong for being able to carry on while dealing with them.</p>
<p>That said, please don’t feel that if you don’t feel better after your 6-week plan, that you have to stick it out so as not to disappoint your parents. You said you feel guilty about not enjoying it when they paid so much for you to be there, but they would not consider it money well spent if it made you miserable! </p>
<p>One last thing: you said something about how the thoughts that keep popping into your head are not helping at all. If you mean that you’re having thoughts about hurting yourself or killing yourself, please let your counseling team know about it. </p>
<p>justadrizzle, here’s another mom-hug for you ((((((( )))))))</p>
<p>I am very impressed with you. You have great insight, and you are absolutely doing the right thing in reaching out. You’re going to make it through this. It will take a little time, but you are already making progress. Keep following the 6-week plan. If at any point, you feel that it’s not working like it should, go back and tell them. You have a good and caring team there.</p>
<p>And you’ve obviously got a bunch of moms right here, rooting for you. A lot of us hang around here at night. Come talk to us when you’re feeling down.</p>
<p>One thing about communicating–my daughter has had a hard time being away from me for more than a day or two (her dad and I are divorced, and sometimes we are apart for up to several weeks–she is still in HS). She decided that she actually feels WORSE when she checks in too much or hears my voice when she is already down. Skyping would not be a good thing for her.</p>
<p>Just a thought that you might want to try different frequency and “styles” for keeping in touch and see what makes you feel best. There is no one right answer.</p>
<p>You are going to get through this…and a lot of people are pulling for you.</p>
<p>HImom’s suggestion is an excellent one. A good hard workout has been proven to help with blue feelings. It really works. Give it a try tomorrow.</p>
<p>My oldest had a similar experience even though she was only an hour and a half away! She lost a lot of weight and couldn’t eat (not and eating disorder…just the anxiety made her puke). It was a very rough first semester. She did the course work, went to class, got a wonderful counselor through the school. She made it through her first semester, but she came home every weekend. She stuck it out the first year and transferred to her dream school for her second year. 30 minutes away. You want to know how many times she’s been home in 3 years? None. Except for holidays. She LOVES her new school and has thrived there. It was not worth it as parents to see her anxiety and sadness. She tried lots of things and finally went on celexa. That’s when I felt like I got my daughter back. She still uses the tools she got in counseling to deal with a highly stressful major. She’s now happier and more confident than ever. YOU do what is right for YOU, and if being close will allow you to thrive then do it! </p>
<p>Good distractions! I’ve been writing letters, and as a writer, it’s really therapeutic. My roommate is also being super helpful. She and I are both out of state, so we’re both in this together. She’s helped me through a lot. My counselor and I also set up a song that I can listen to when my anxiety levels are at their highest–mine happens to be “Go the Distance” from Hercules. It also hurts less to talk to my mom on the phone–it’s more of a blessing to do it now than anything. I mean, I’m still sad, but I’m actively trying to fight it. I also finally got to sleep in for the first time in like two weeks, so that makes me feel better. I’ve also found that its easier for me to eat in my dorm than it is to eat in the dining hall. So, I’ve been taking my food to go. Right now, we’re just in our dorms blasting musical soundtracks. Thank you guys so much. I’ve been getting support from all facets of the internet, and it really helps with not feeling alone. My mom also found this post, and she’s been actively helping me get through it as well. She’s not mad, she’s super supportive. This has been, and still is a wild ride. </p>