<p>I know that if you are 18, it is illegal for parents to open your mail but I was wondering if you guys think it is morally wrong?</p>
<p>I got home today and went to check the mailbox (empty) because I heard about USC decisions coming out...</p>
<p>I come back inside and my mom informs me that I had been rejected; she had checked the mail while I was at school, and seen a letter from USC and opened it because she 'wanted to know' and then threw the letter away.</p>
<p>I'm really angry not because I don't want my parents to know about my decisions, but I think it is my right to be the first to know.</p>
<p>OH MY GOODNESS YES
my mom did this too. Then i told her i wouldnt tell her any of the UC results (and I didnt for a week) because she did that and she hasnt opened my mail since lol.</p>
<p>yes that is disgusting. your parents are selfish to deprive you of your excitement and angst regarding your admission decision. are they asian? haha</p>
<p>That’s wrong. She read it, threw it away, and told you that you were rejected? Extra wrong. That’s hardly any closure at all.</p>
<p>For one, I was at a party and my mom called me to say that a large envelope had arrived and I told her to open it. However, I knew “large envelope” meant acceptance and I told her to. Otherwise, it would not have been okay.</p>
<p>mine is.
She also enjoys keeping close tab on my grades and during the college application process she referred to the application as “our” application LOL.</p>
<p>My moms hella nice though; she just really wants to live her life through me.</p>
<p>I told my parents that if they opened my college letters, I’d be beyond furious. I have fantasized about opening these envelopes for *so *long; it’s definitely something that I wanted to do myself. My mom was really cute about it, the first letter I got, she texted me “it’s here!!” and put it on my pillow. I was very impressed that she resisted the urge to open it.</p>
<p>Of the four letters I got, two said “Congratulations!” on the outside, and the others were big, thick envelopes. So my parents have been good with it but I still haven’t really experienced the anticipation of holding your breath and tearing it open, ah well.</p>
<p>Not so much wrong as illegal… isn’t it a federal crime to open somebody else’s mail? But yeah, don’t open other peoples’ mail. It’s ****ty of you.</p>
<p>Devil’s Advocate here–is there any reason your mom would not want you to go to USC (like distance or cost) and is just saying she threw away a rejection letter? If you never actually found or saw it, maybe you should find another way to confirm your status. Not trying to dis your Mom. Good luck</p>
<p>Parents should not open their student’s decision letters, as the student has the right to be the first to know and the first to read the actual letter. Throwing away the actual letter is even worse.</p>
<p>I appreciated my mom sorting through the college spam during sophomore, junior, and first semester of senior year to get rid of the mail from schools I would definitely not be interested in, as it greatly reduced the spam for me and as she was lenient with what she threw away.</p>
<p>However, once I had submitted my applications, I made it clear to my parents that I wanted to be the first to open mail from any schools that I’ve applied to, and they’ve both adhered to that request.</p>
<p>I have always imaged the moment that I open the letter and says “Congratulations!” If that day comes, I will ask someone to record my reactions immediately after opening the letter. If my mom opens the letter for me, I will be so upset.
Throw it away? ooo…, something fishy here.</p>
<p>I think it’s only okay to open letters when you’re not home (like on a vacation). For example, my dad opened my Brandeis letter (which clearly said Congratulations! on it) while I was visiting another school out of state. I think it’s completely wrong to open your mail when you could easily open it yourself a few hours later though.</p>
<p>^
If you’re not home, it’s definitely much more acceptable for a parent to open it, and will probably do a great service to the student (as most are at the very least a bit impatient as to seeing their decisions). The best thing a parent could do in this situation would be to call/text/otherwise contact the student and ask whether they should open the letter.</p>
<p>Parent here … not only do I think it was wrong … it is almost totally unnecesary; it is fight there is no need to cause … if it is fat/big envelop with “congratulations” or “welcome” written on it then opening the letter isn’t really necessary … skinny window envelope with nothing written on it typically is not a mystory either. (btw - opening anf then throwing away your mail is not even close to acceptable imo)</p>
<p>It is only OK if the student has given prior permission; otherwise the parent has to wait. But isn’t it obvious from the size of the envelopes? If a thick envelope arrived from a much anticipated school, I might text my student that it had arrived, and should I open it? But no, opening someone else’s mail is wrong. Ummm, I should get prior permission to discard the ton of junk mail that arrives, incl. from UChi which we have concluded would be a 100% mismatch plus she would never get admitted there.</p>
<p>I think opening is fine WITH permission. Opening without permission is wrong. After I got deferred from Brown, even though I’d found out online, my dad still opened the deferral letter they sent in the mail a week later and left it open on the counter. I was pretty annoyed but I didn’t say anything since we both knew what the letter would say before it came in the mail anyway so no harm no foul.</p>
<p>I get really annoyed at my parents too when they open my letters before me. I often come home from work and see an opened envelope on my desk. Then my parents immediately start talking about it and celebrate for me, before I even know what the letter contains. I think that parents shouldn’t open it before the child, but they still do.</p>