Is this true about "asian" (tiger) parenting?

<p>(I asked this Q. on the Parents forum but I would like to get some students perspective. Also, sorry about the stereotypical title. It gets the thread attention lol)</p>

<p>Based on personal experience, my Asian female friends have WAY MORE freedom then my Asian male friends. It seems like Asian parents are 10x more strict with guys than girls. For example, most of my Asian male friends are expected to get straight A's, and have lots of social restrictions. Most of my Asian female friends can go to parties, get good but not great grades and overall have a lot more freedom. </p>

<p>BTW, Im not mentioning college selection since I'm in college but I also noticed that my guy friends cared much more about attending HYPS when I was in HS. </p>

<p>Anyone have similar experience? Is it a culture thing?</p>

<p>It depends, but there might be more pressure on males to carry on a legacy</p>

<p>Really? I feel like most Asian parents are strict to both their sons and daughters. I know my parents are lol.</p>

<p>I’ve never actually heard about that before. As a person who comes from a very Asian high school and community, tiger parents tend to be strict on both genders, girls don’t get the lenient stick. And that Tiger Mom memoir, the author had 2 daughters and she was strict on both of them.</p>

<p>Don’t know if this is a Singapore thing but my female friend from Singapore said most of her female friends hope to get rich by marrying a wealthy guy. Most don’t want to be successful on their own. I also know a guy from Singapore who says the same thing.</p>

<p>Don’t know how common this is but just a personal anecdote.</p>

<p>^^ a.k.a. gold diggers, haha. That also happens in Korea, according to my Calculus teacher. But I don’t think it’s that rampant in the U.S. Maybe because some Asian cultures tend to be patriarchal? Who knows.</p>

<p>I think its worse in Singapore though. Singapore has lots of laws that are biased against men. Google Women’s Charter. You’ll get a bunch of academic articles saying how great it is. However, its basically a way for women to ensure themselves free money. </p>

<p>There are thousands of women in Singapore that have had brief marriages (no kids) and basically live in luxury and do little to no work. Even if the marriages are very short and the wife can clearly get a job oftentimes the courts will still require the husband to pay spousal support (they call it maintenance). Also, if the ex-wife falls into financial trouble she can demand more from her ex-husband even if its long after the marriage ended.</p>

<p>Never experienced/seen this before; I don’t think it’s common enough for it to be a generalization. Also, I don’t think you can compare males and females in this way unless they come from the same family.</p>

<p>Even among the same family IMO the parents are stricter with the sons.</p>

<p>Almost all of my Vietnamese friends tell me their parents want them to be successful so the kids can support them when they get older. I never saw a difference in tiger parenting between male and female kids, though.</p>

<p>Bump 10char</p>

<p>From my experiences, it depends. A lot of Asian guys from my school are huge party-goers, drinkers, hypebeasts, and such. Girls are quite the same too. I only know a few Asian guys(maybe because the school population is mixed and there are barely asians) that are pressured to get really good grades.</p>

<p>It depends, guys. You can never just look at some Asians and conclude that we’re all same (by gender). We are not.</p>

<p>It’s not even a cultural asian thing. I’m a boy and my parents are pretty lenient. They never force me to do anything I dont like. Just do whatever I want as long as it’s not illegal. And also have a few Asian friends (including both males an females) whose parents are extremely strict to them</p>

<p>So, don’t ever ask things like do Asian female do this, or do Asian male do that. The answers would never come out the same.</p>

<p>Beside the tradition ( in term of dress, music, food, etc). Asian is mostly just like any other races.</p>

<p>Some are smart. Some are not.
Some are extremely strict. Some are pretty lenient.
Some value education and always put education on top. Some dont even care.
Some are proud to be Asian. Some are not.
Some are tall. Some are short.</p>

<p>As you’re asking the question about asian, I’m assuming you’re not asian. But look, does the list above apply to your race also? Certainly, right?</p>

<p>@daivinhtran1993:</p>

<p>Sorry if I offended you. Im basing this off my personal experience and nothing else. I was just wondering if my experiences were atypical. I just know its common to assume Asian parents are strict but at least in my experience, this seemed more true for boys but maybe thats just me.</p>

<p>@daivintran1993: I haven’t disagreed with anything you’ve said. The closest I’ve come to stereotyping is to say that some laws in Asian countries (i.e. the Women’s Charter in Singapore or Korea’s mandatory military service) MAY influence how son’s and daughters are raised if their parents are from those countries (however they may not). </p>

<p>Also, yes the list applies equally to all races.</p>

<p>Even though my assumption that you’re not asian wasnt right, you still understand my post. The point I made here is that different people experience different things. So dont use the term “Asian” when asking those cultural questions. It’s too general.</p>

<p>Again, look at the world map and look closer to the Asia continent, and count how many countries are there. Singapore and Korean aren’t just the only countries. (And you already knew that, right? :D)</p>

<p>P/s: Fortunately, my parents are awesome. They give me freedom. :D</p>

<p>From my experience, given that Asians outnumber whites and are the most common race at my school… It’s the girls that have the pressure–only one guy is in the top 10 in each of the classes of 13 (and for C/o 13 he was rank 10) and 15 at my school. I see the girls outnumber guys in AP classes with a 2 or more : 1 ratio in almost all of them except Calculus BC.</p>

<p>I feel that say out of the top 10, the majority have been pressured, while 1 or 2 of them actually love everything they’re doing and are motivated by competition / self-ambition whatever you call it. Guy traits. Stereotypical girl submissiveness, is powerful in it’s own sense…</p>

<p>That’s just one way to take it, sorry for any sexism. As well, there are a lot other variables to factor in such as middle vs. oldest child, but I’ll leave it as what I said and disinclude the “Asian” factor.</p>

<p>My Asian friends are pressured equally, whether male or female. That doesn’t go to say that the girls do as well, though… The majority of my female Asian friends are a part of one or more gigantic fandom that takes up the majority of their time and energy, whereas the majority of my male asian friends are not and so can focus more on their schoolwork. But the only one of my Asian friends who goes to parties is male, and he is barely in the top 50% in his class. So I think the pressure depends on the parents, not on the gender of the child.</p>