I recently moved to away for college and it’s been a little over a month. At first, I was doing fine, I missed my family here and there but the homesickness/stress of school wasn’t taking me over. I went home for my birthday weekend and noticed how happy I was being home which is something I hadn’t felt in a long time. As soon as I got back to school, everything changed. I would wake up sad every day and go to sleep sad every day. I wanted to cry at the most random times, even when I was with friends and having a good time. I wasn’t sure if this was just homesicknesses or me being unhappy. Two weeks later, I went home again because I needed to be happy and secure with my family again. I was very unsure of going home because of how it affected me last time, but I figured this would be kind of like a training that would get better. However, I feel worse. On the train, I was hoping something terrible would happen to me/or my train so that I would HAVE to go back home. I’m usually not the type to feel sad, so this is such a new feeling for me. I feel like I’m drowning in my thoughts and I cry about 3 times a day. Originally, I wanted to go to school for nursing and I was offered a great scholarship at a university near home but I brushed it off because I got into one of my top schools (they don’t have a nursing program) and I wanted to experience moving away and independence. Now, I can’t help but think if nursing is what I am supposed to do because working in a hospital has always been something I can picture myself pursuing. Also, financially, transferring back would be a smart option when considering financial circumstances, it would be a lot cheaper because of the scholarship I was awarded and I would be pursuing a career that I genuinely enjoy (downside is I would need to take an extra year, so I would graduate a year late). As of right now, I do think I would be happier going to school closer to home, but don’t want to regret the opportunities I can get here. I have been telling myself I need to stick it out for at least this quarter and next quarter, but I am hoping time will do its magic and will help me make the best decision for myself and my future. Please leave any advice or feedback that can be helpful, I am so confused and I need all the help I could get!
Does your current college have a counseling office or an advisor you could talk to asap? It sounds like you would benefit greatly from talking and flushing out your fears, sadness, and expectations with a supportive staff member. There is no shame in transferring out if that is what you want. The staff member may be able to help you decide if this is in your best immediate interest and long term interest, and also be an immediate support for you.
Yes, I spoke to a counselor last week and let everything out. It felt really good to express my emotions, but I won’t be able to meet with another counselor until December which is unfortunate. I was planning on meeting with a Health advisor to see if I could still become a nurse with a degree in Psychology (my current major), but it’s weird because I’m hoping the counselor says no so that I would have to transfer back if this is something that I want long term. I also feel pressured because my brother just graduated from this University and he is so successful as a post graduate. He met his lifelong friends and absolutely loved it here, so I’m scared that I’m going to be compared to him as a failure.
If you can’t get in with a counselor at school, can you see a private counselor in the town that you’re in???
ALSO:
The scholarship that was offered to you may have been given to someone else already. They use scholarships to entice students to go to the school. You can’t assume that the money is sitting there waiting for you.
I probably can, but the city I am currently living in is pricey so I’m assuming I wouldn’t be able to afford it.
I’ve actually spoken to an academic counselor from the school back home and she said I wouldn’t get the full amount I was offered, but I would still get some financial help from the scholarship.