Making new friends sophomore year

<p>Let me start by saying that my freshman year went quite well, both academically and socially. I quickly became friends with most of my floor mates and developed a few close friendships. I was friends with more girls than guys, which was a new experience for me since I came from an all male high school. I was happy and, considering the fact that I am rather quiet and have some social anxiety, rather proud of myself. </p>

<p>As time wore on through the second semester of freshman year, two groups of friends developed on my floor - one of which was "cooler" and somewhat obnoxious, the other of which was more reserved. As someone who strongly values close individual friendships, I resisted leaning towards either group and instead tried my best to maintain my existing friendships with members of both sides. I was successful for awhile, until it came time to decide on sophomore living arrangements. Not surprisingly, the two groups diverged even more at this point, and I ended up deciding to live with the more tame group. </p>

<p>Now, a week into sophomore year, I am suddenly feeling trapped in a very boring social situation. I am still good friends with the people I live with, but I am realizing more every day that they are seriously dull and boring people. I can't even explain how much I miss the early part of freshman year, when it was so easy to get a group of people together to do things - sports, drinking, dinner, whatever. Now, I feel like I have nowhere to turn for excitement. I am not angry or frustrated with my friends per se, I just feel the need to branch out and find people more like me - people who are always looking for fun and excitement, whether it is pickup sports, partying, weekend trips, etc. I can't stay stuck in this situation where my friends are too lazy and unadventurous to do anything without constant nagging from me - It's been a week and I am already tired of trying so hard to have fun. I am not a huge partier, but I am at the point where I couldn't find a group to go out with if I wanted to. Again, I am not trying to complain about my friends, I'm just not satisfied with the college experience I am getting through them.</p>

<p>So, my question is this: what are some ways I can get to know some people who are more like me. Obviously I know getting more involved on campus is the basic answer (I am currently looking into clubs, etc. and picking a few to check out), but I am hoping to find some more specific advice and/or personal stories. The reason I think my situation is uniquely difficult is that I am very adventurous yet not very outgoing - I am willing to do a huge variety of activities, but I am quiet and self-conscious around people who do not know me well, making it difficult and stressful to meet new people to do those activities with.</p>

<p>One thing I am considering is Greek life. I am far from a typical "frat boy," but I am thinking that a service or honors fraternity, or maybe a traditional frat with a more mellow reputation might be a good fir for me.</p>

<p>I have spoke with my parents and some friends from home about my situation, so it's not like I am just using the internet in place of actually talking about my problems. My reason for posting this is to hopefully find someone who made it through a similar situation with a happy ending.</p>

<p>Can you contact your “cool” friends and ask them what they are up to? Also definitely look for a club that does what you are interested in doing. Or join clubs that are more active…I bet you will find people. So if you want to go kayaking but there is only a hiking club, i bet those hikers will be outdoorsy/adventurous and will try what you want. Also try putting up a flyer in your dorm/on FB asking if anyone is interested in doing (whatever).</p>

<p>Try to do more things that align with your interests. What does your school have in terms of outdoor activities? Are there clubs that plan outdoor trips (like camping, kayaking, skiing, whatever is around your area)? That’s a good way to meet people with like interests. Is there a particular sport that you like? Join an intramural team at your school. Reach out to some of your old friends from freshman year and organize something. There’s no reason you can only hang out with certain people. There were times when I went out with friends that I hadn’t talked to for a couple of years and we had a great time. Does your school have activities like concerts, sports games, and other big events? I’ve met a lot of random people at big school events. Are there clubs that do a lot of social activities? There were clubs at my school that would organize things like going out to dinner or clubs or the beach or other social activities. You can do random things that you find interesting, even if none of your friends want to do it.</p>