<p>Can somebody tell me if they think my essay will award me an 11 or 12?
I had the essay:
Individual interest vs. group interest</p>
<p>My examples:</p>
<p>John Nash and Game Theory:
when individuals look out for themselves, they become worse off than when they collude and look out for the group's best interest. I touched on the prisoners dillemma, and general game theories.</p>
<p>Issues with Capitalism:
when each individual has the freedom to strive for their own best interest and wealth in a capitalist economy, there is a great disparity between classes, much more poverty, and increases in unemployment. If each citizen of a country was paid equally (i know im kind of supporting communism), there would be no division of extreme classes. Group interest works out better for the population as a whole.</p>
<p>Do you guys think i supported my position well and used good examples?
How would you grade my essay?</p>
<p>I really like the John Nash and Game Theory example. Hopefully your reader had some insight into it (which i doubt tbh).
But yeah, that really suits the topic. Nice pick.</p>
<p>I talked about The Civil Rights leaders using different techniques (nonviolence, MLK, violence, Malcolm X, etc.), and how the movement succeeded only when they unified as a team under nonviolent protest.</p>
<p>My examples were:
loyalty towards someone: Hitler, KKK (humanitarian crimes)
loyalty toward something, a cause, an ideal: Einstein, Edison (advancement in human race)</p>
<p>A bunch of my friends wrote about MLK.
I didn't realize it was so obvious. :/</p>
<p>I wrote how when an individual DOESN'T work together with a group, then the individual is unsuccessful. I hope my message was clear though...</p>
<p>-American Revolution (Benedict Arnold was a traitor!)
-Treaty of Versailles (Wilson's adamant demand for the League of Nations and abandoning the rest of his Fourteen Points.. I included the Guilt Clause.. Wilson was unsuccessful because he did not compromise with the US government)</p>
<p>I wrote that individual interests can deter a group from its goals</p>
<p>My examples were:
-the early feminist movement (it split over disagreement about the 13th Amendment)
-the Office episode "A Benihana Christmas" (everyone was much happier at the combined party than when they had to choose between the competing parties)</p>