Does anyone have any experience with a student going away (far) to college with mental health issues? My ds has anxiety and depression and I am trying to set up support for him at his future college, but I’m scared for him.
Does the college offer counseling services? Some schools I’m familiar allocate 10 therapy/counseling sessions per semester per student, and that helps even those students who aren’t dealing with clinically diagnosed mental health issues. I’d advise checking into the care available at the school and being proactive and setting up sessions ahead of time. If he had a chronic skin condition you’d want him to have routine scheduled checkups for it while away, so treat this the same way. It’s ok to helicopter a bit, especially in year 1 with this type of concerns.
Another thing to be aware of: it’s surprising how far schools are stretching the ‘emotional support animal’ definition these days. There are all sorts of pets to be found in dorms today, sanctioned by schools as part of the health initiatives of the school.
And encourage him to get involved early in an activity that has a built-in network and functions as a team. The school newspaper, pep band, chorale, the ultimate frisbee team, the community garden, something that has a group deliverable that he can be part of and that will provide him an opportunity to focus on a collective goal outside his own while also gaining the support of a crew.
Also check your medical insurance and what and where it covers. If he needs a referral from campus to a local therapist, you will need to have him covered. Consider speaking with his current therapist to see if it is possible to arrange a video visit. If he is taking medication, set up a system with current therapist who will be able to electronically send prescription to local pharmacy and keep in mind that your son will have to have a way to pick up his medication.
My three kids are through college now.
Of their (~10) high school friends who went to college with previously diagnosed mental health issues, most were successful. They were in a good place when they left home, and they and their parents had a plan in place.
Those those who struggled to the point of needing to take a medical leave in the middle of a semester, or taking a year or so break, did appear (from the outside) to have a few things in common as they left for their freshman years of college.
They were not in a great place personally when they left for college. Their parents were hopeful that things would magically even out when they got there, or thought they just needed to spread their wings, or the student had just started a new medication the summer before college and wasn’t really stable yet, or the student believed that college would be different.
And then there was a lack of clear, honest communication between the student and parents once the student got to college. The student stopped his meds, or didn’t go to the therapist, or didn’t sign the agreement form to allow parents to speak to the provider. The student would say everything was just great, and the parents didn’t have a way to confirm it. The students panicked and tried desperately to “fix” things on their own.
I’d suggest that if you are already worried, that you and your student clearly set up some parameters before he leaves. He needs to allow you access to his grades, and provide written documentation to all of his providers to allow you to speak with them. Maybe set up a specific time every week to Facetime so that you can get a live, visual look at how he’s doing.
Don’t hover, or press, or create more anxiety, but give yourself the ability to catch developing problems early.
(I would never say any of this as a general suggestion for most parents of college students. I’ve never seen any of my kids’ grades or spoken to their medical providers or RAs or professors.)
My thoughts on choosing a college for a child with anxiety:
http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/2007642-students-with-anxiety-choosing-a-college-p1.html