<p>I am 21 year old college student. I completed my first year at one college and transferred because I changed my major and I was really unhappy and it was a huge party school. I don't drink or smoke, I don't enjoy it. I transferred to a school closer to my hometown to give me time to think about my next step while still taking classes and working towards a degree. I ended up stayed at this school and just began my third year here. I am completely miserable. I go to an extremely rural college with 1300 student, most of them live in the immediate area so they commute or go home on weekends. As I said, it is my third year here and I have made no friends and I live in a single room. I feel completely isolated. I am painfully shy and my classes are terrible. I go to the dining hall and try to sit with strangers but it is so awkward and it never leads anywhere. I am wondering if at this point (2nd semester junior) if it is worth it to try and transfer again and find a more friendly campus? Also, any advice on how to make my time here bearable? We have no sports teams and limited clubs and there is no town or nightlife within an hour radius. Thanks, help is appreciated.</p>
<p>i’d transfer.</p>
<p>If I were you I’d rough it out until the end. I wouldn’t want to go through the entire transfer process where potentially the same thing happens. </p>
<p>As for your time, work hard, keep your grades up. Learn something for fun. Do whatever you need to just relax and destress each day. </p>
<p>It’s a sucky situation and I apologize, but you have to make the most out of it. Running from place to place just doesn’t seem like a great solution – you’ll have to deal with transferring units, and hell the place might be worse.</p>
<p>I agree with marcdvl. The way i see it, the more times you transfer the more people aren’t going to know you. You mentioned that there are limited clubs… Do any of those clubs interest you? If they do, maybe you should sign up for one. You’ll meet people who are interested in the same things as you (good conversation starters? 
) Or another way to talk to people is in your class. Maybe after class you could strike up a quick conversation with someone about the lesson you covered. Or maybe you could join a study group (if there are any). It’s all about putting yourself out there, and how you do it. I truthfully don’t think going through the transfer process again and going to another new place will solve anything. Best of luck :)</p>
<p>So what insights have you obtained while you were thinking things over last year? Did you just re-enroll at your rural college because you didn’t research other options? Have you decided what it is exactly that might make you happy?</p>
<p>If you truly have, I would transfer, change majors, etc. There might even be some places that would let you enroll this fall (my daughter’s friend actually did that at the last minute). However, if you still don’t know what you want, I would stay put for this semester.</p>
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<p>I don’t think transferring again will solve the problem. It sounds like the problem is YOU. Don’t sit there, acting like a King/Queen, and wait for people to flock to you. Not only is that not going to happen, you must be very delusional if you think that it will happen. People in college don’t give two ****s if you’re alone all the time. You have to make a conscious effort on your part to form friendships. Friends are not going to drop onto your lap. There are plenty of opportunities for you to make friends, no matter what school you go to. If you think there’s no one in your school you can befriend, you aren’t open-minded enough to have any friends, or you don’t have the social skills. It’s like any opportunity in life, you do actually have to put forth some effort and keep an open mind in order to get what you want. Would you want to be friends with someone who just sat there and waited for you to initiate everything or who thought you were below them?</p>
<p>I must slightly disagree with dwaynejohnson. I don’t think that it is necessarily “you”. Very small schools can be difficult if you don’t fit into the prevailing culture of the place. And if it is a very traditional place that doesn’t easily accept different people, that can be tough. Our high school was three times larger than your college and my kids thought it was sort of stifling. Larger, more urban schools tend to have a wider cross-section of people and I feel that you are more likely to find like-minded and tolerant students. Check out the demographics of any other colleges you are considering.</p>
<p>Still, dwaynejohnson is correct in that you must put forth the effort to meet people.</p>
<p>I in no way think that I am the Queen of campus and expect people to come to me. I do try to be friendly and open and pursue connections with others. I smile at everyone and say hi to some people. I have sat with random strangers trying to establish connections but it is very awkward and hard to break into their conversations. No one in my hall leaves their doors open either because there is no way to keep them open unless you stick a heavy object against it which I guess people are too lazy to do. Should I try just going around knocking say hi? I try to keep my door open but I am also at the end of the hallway so people rarely venture my way. Like I have said, I am shy but I do make the effort to try to not appear so. I do feel like the odd one out because I go to such a tiny liberal Vermont college with recreation drug use which isn’t something I can do. While I know not everyone smokes weed on campus, I know many do. I am struggling to find common interests with people, even in my classes.
I think at this point in my curriculum I am sticking with my major. I have looked at other schools in the past to transfer again and even been accepted but chickened out because it was starting all over once again.
At this point I am trying to stick it out and seeing a campus counselor but I just wanted advice from others as to other ways of meeting people and if maybe transferring would be a solution. I attempted to reach out to my parents and ask for help but I do not seem to have their support in transferring yet again and most likely delaying my graduation even more. I am also debating dropping a class because 5 upper level english classes is giving me more reading than I can keep up with and I am getting the readings confused, so that may take some pressure off.
As far as clubs, they are soccer, dodgeball and student government. I am trying but definitely had a freak-out period that I felt was swallowing me whole. Trying to work my way out of it. Thanks for responses and advice. It has helped.</p>
<p>Transferring at this late date seems extreme, but I admit that the set of clubs is awfully limited. Are you sure that nothing else is available? Aren’t there any volunteer organizations? Doing volunteer work is a great way to meet nice people. What kind of club would you join if it were available?</p>
<p>Seeing a counselor is a great idea; I’d also recommend regular exercise for stress relief.</p>
<p>There is no way a school with 1300 students ONLY has those 3 clubs.
I know a commuter school with ~1000 students that has way more options than that.</p>
<p>There has to be something else you could join. What school are you at? If you give us the name we may be able to help out.</p>
<p>drop out and do some soul searching, school ain’t for everybody.</p>