As MOG, I asked bride about preferred length and color. Her dress is white, and bridesmaids are going to be in a champagne type color(unless that has changed). We’ll see them for Thanksgiving and can double check then about colors. But if the colors stay neutral, I’m hoping whatever color my dress ends up being ( I like shades of blue but who knows what I’ll end up with) and whatever color stepmom ends up picking shouldn’t be a problem. I think rules about these kinds of things do seem looser these days.
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Just saying… looks like Nordstrom has more formal dresses in stock than it had in the summer. Some JS dresses look great. Like this one:
https://www.nordstrom.com/s/js-collections-beaded-illusion-neck-gown/5963755
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I like that but wonder how it would look in wedding photographs.
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Nordstrom did have some nice ones! This one struck me as classic, elegant, and maybe flattering for a variety of figures…?
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Unlikely to be MOB or MOG anytime in the foreseeable future, but I myself would keep away from beiges and blacks. I would love something like this:
Or this:
https://www.adriannapapell.com/products/long-beaded-blouson-dress-in-dusty-blue-ap1e207604
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I like both of those (and also like the price range- I don’t really want to pay more than 150-250 for a dress). Good ideas for someone looking for a long gown.
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Agree - I would stay away from black & beige too (dresses posted were navy and blush 
).
Love that dusty periwinkle color!
I’m a MOB (2 weeks out on the wedding, YIPEE!)
I have met the MOG and we’ve spent tons of time together. She is a great person and always deferred to me before making any decisions regarding the wedding (except the rehearsal dinner, which is her show). I appreciated it but I am super low maintenance where all of this is concerned. I told her to look for a dress whenever she wanted, and whatever color and style and buy it. We are black tie optional with the moms wearing gowns. I knew I would zero in on a navy dress (black feels too much like a funeral to me), so that’s the only thing I told her (and honestly, I wouldn’t care if she wore navy too.
Our kids have been trying to get married for 2 years (Covid) and prior to their original date, she texted me a couple of dresses she found at Nordstrom Rack - none of which looked like mine (she knows what mine looks like) - but since then, she mentioned that she was looking at other dresses, so I don’t know what she decided. Her older son got married in April and she wore a darker gray gown (that MOB matched her dress to the color of the bridesmaid dresses, which I thought was interesting).
Our bridesmaids will be in a taupey-blush color, so red would definitely clash (burgundy would be ok). Unless it’s Christmas themed, I would personally stay away from red.
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As I think about this, I can see where a few things could come into play about the timing of dress acquisition between MOB and MOG. Personality types (planner v. non-planner), interest in fashion (someone who is really into it v. someone who is not/doesn’t really care what she wears), and difficulty with fit (one can easily wear something off the rack v. someone who knows they always need significant alternations, hemming, etc).
I will only ever be a MOG, and it would be hard for me to wait, too. On the other hand, I could also easily be the type who would be in a rush to buy something to check off that box and who would then later find something I liked better.
I would hope that the bride would have a color and length preference for me if and when that day ever comes. Having some sort of guidelines makes it easier. I mean, a focused question for a college application essay is much easier than one that is wide open to anything. Same thing with dresses. “Long and either dark green or navy,” is much easier than, “Wear whatever you want!”
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My mother was a stickler for etiquette, but even though she was determined there was a “right” way to do things, it’s not that simple.
My S married someone who’s religious background was different than ours, and as neither converted, their wedding was outside of and a blend of both traditions.
So while the MOG typically waits for the MOB to choose her dress first, I knew 1) that probably wasn’t going to happen, and 2) it really didn’t matter. The MOB is a lot younger, taller, and thinner than me, and even if we wore the exact same dress, it would look totally different!
We both ended up with black sparkly gowns (evening wedding, colors were black and gold) that were completely different styles. Both were perfect.
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Someone’s “red” might actually be another person’s burgundy or wine colored or some other form of “red”.
I’ve been MOG once. MOB wore a long, sparkly gown, I wore a short black/white non-fitted with a little sparkle in the collar area. I showed it to DIL before I bought it but boy was I relieved I did not have to wear a long gown. SO un-me.
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I checked with bride and MOB and wore a red dress to my niece’s wedding. Red is good luck for Chinese culture and it was a pretty dress in a color I didn’t have. Another guest also wore a red dress. No one blinked an eye.
As long as the bride and groom are fine, I think everyone else should celebrate the event.
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I didn’t know there were so many “rules”. I’ve been MOG once. I was asked to wear long in any shade of burgundy. I loved having some clear direction. I never though to share my dress with MOB. I figured we would not choose the same dress.
MOB - I’m on my 2nd round. One daughter said to wear whatever I wanted. I wore long because I found a dress I liked. I didn’t know what MOG was wearing and she never contacted me. This round my D2 asked that I wear a solid long dress. I like Long because I don’t like to wear heels and I can get away with a lower heel in a long dress.
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I definitely care what I’m wearing but I’m not a “look at me!” personality, so I would feel very uncomfortable in a color that made people turn heads. In a friend of my daughter’s wedding, the MOG wore hot pink - she looked fantastic but you were drawn to her more so than the bride (I think there was some drama there). My daughter didn’t micromanage my dress selection at all, so she must trust that I have even just a basic sense of fashion.
I’m picky so it took me a while to find the right dress. I didn’t want to go the whole bridal shop route, nor did I want to spend more than $300. Everything that I liked was $600++ I had to have sleeves and I’m picky about necklines and don’t like sequins, sparkle or tons of adornment. Too many sleeveless dresses and high necklines out there. It’s an evening wedding outdoors in October (reception is under a tent). I found the perfect dress for me on clearance for $80 and bought it in 2 sizes (just in case ) So far the smaller size is still winning 
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I read as MOG you shouldn’t wear white, black or red. For my sons wedding MOB said not to wait for her. Bridesmaids wore navy so DIL said anything but navy. I ended up wearing a maroon and MOB wore kind of silver. For my daughter the wedding had kind of a garden party theme so I wanted something flowy and ended up with a navy colored dress. MOG wore a pink flowered dress.
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I am a guest this time instead of MOG and dilemma is a 3:30 wedding in 2 weeks in upstate New York. Dinner and dance afterwords. I am trying to figure out if I get get away with some sparkle, not sequins but sparkly lace. https://www.macys.com/shop/product/r-m-richards-3-pc.-lace-top-jacket-pants?ID=12931264 in navy.
I can’t find a dress I like that fits and would be suitable. What do think?
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I like it in Navy!
I think it’s a cute outfit and see no problem with the outfit in either color. Nice price and outfit. My concern is whether it wrinkles a lot, since you will be wearing it for many hours, sitting and standing and maybe dancing. Can’t really tell without seeing and trying outfit on (and even crushing a small portion of it in your hand to see how it reshapes itself).