My May Essay, scored 11 out of 12

<p>429 word count – Score = 11/12</p>

<p>ESSAY PROMPT
Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and the assignment below:
There is no progress unless someone comes up with a new way of looking at things, of trying things that have never been done or thought of before. We cannot move forward by looking backward to old customs and past experience. There can be no advancement or improvement unless there are people who look forward in pursuit of the new and untried.
Assignment: Does progress depend on people with new ideas rather than on people whose ideas are based on the current way of doing things? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>

<p>the essay, typos still here:</p>

<pre><code> Humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years, according to scientists. The humans we see today come from a chain of technology and inventions, dating back thousands of years. Humans were hunters and gatherers before somebody realized that a rock rolled better than a brick. They learned that agriculture could help them settle down in a location. If these people had not realized the possibilities of technology, people would still be chasing elephants. Progressive thinking moves mankind foreward.

    In the 1960s, the Russians launched Sputnik into orbit. Sputnik didn’t have weapons or cameras or anything to be scared of, but it began the space race. Many Americans were scared. They thought it was taking pictures of US military bases. America became determined to catch up to the Russians. Many smart people stepped up to the plate. One was Warner Von Braun. They wanted to catch up to the Soviets, and eventually did by putting a man on the moon. Since this, NASA has turned down the burners on space exploration, but many American corperations havn’t. We now have privately owned satellites in orbit, for things like satellite radio, imagery, weather, and many other things. It is because of some very smart people that space has been explored. The scientists had ideas and they moved mankind foreword. 

     Before the twentieth century, people would travel by horse. They hadn’t experienced the romance of the automobile, until Henry Ford drove his car down the road and astonished everybody in town. It was a horse-less carriage, and it was a car. When Henry Ford put out the Model T Ford, it became the best selling car of the decade. He organized races that got people interested in cars like they had been in horses. Today, the horse is a weekend adventure, and one day the car will be too, because of inventors like Henry Ford who moved mankind into the 20th century.

    A long time ago, the candle was the lighthouse of the world, and people had to go to bed relatively early. When Tom Edison discovered electricity, it spun the world around. Productivity skyrocketed, and today every house in America has electricity. Some people invest in solar-power to fuel their houses. In the future, scientists will come up with new ideas for electricity, but it is because of people like Thomas Edison that we are where we are today. 

    People like Warner Von Braun, Henry Ford, and Thomas Edison brought mankind to where it is today. In the future, that creativity will be reincarnated into other bright minds of inventors.

</code></pre>

<p>okay essay. id have given it an 11 or 12. there were some pretty trite statements but for 20 minutes you did well.</p>

<p>25 minutes.</p>

<p>so what was your answe to the question?</p>

<p>i dont know, i bullshatted it thinking i would get an 8... i got a 5 on the march essay hahaha</p>

<p>my bad, answer*</p>

<p>The may test looks to have been graded ridicuously easy. Or March was way to hard.</p>

<p>idono, maybe just mine was graded ridiculously easy haha</p>

<p>i am in normal english and have a B. my friends in AP english with As and Bs got 10s and 8s</p>

<p>Wow from a 5 to an 11, that is absolutely amazing. Did you even change anything in your style? I know when I improved from my March to May one I just focused in on limiting my examples to two very well explained ideas... Any changes from march to may for you?</p>

<p>i found that sophisticated AP writers scored lower than honors people... i think the blunt writing style of honors people suits the situation better</p>

<p>my march essay was like 250 words while my may essay was 430 words. after i wrote it i knew my march essay sucked ass, and knew my may sat was good enough for an 8. I liked this prompt a lot more than the march one.</p>

<p>"my march essay was like 250 words while my may essay was 430 words"</p>

<p>Explains everything.</p>

<p>So length and staying on topic is good enough for an 11 or 12?</p>

<p>This essay got an 11????? Heaven forbid. It lacks any originality and the writing style is very simplistic, actually puerile in its thought processes. As an English teacher, I'd give it a solid C. I guess it is long.</p>

<p>LOL, I just read it. You don't have any vocabulary worth noting and complex sentence structure is completely absent. On the other hand, 11 is a very good score. Good work....</p>

<p>thanks, now you see why MIT doesnt care for this essay haha.</p>

<p>lol i like the first sentence "Humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years, <b>according to scientists"</b></p><b>
</b>

<p>One more thing, thomas edison invented the lightbulb but did not discover electricity. Actually...he just patented the lightbulb, he paid two CANADIANS who invented the lightbulb for the patent, and the two guys never got their proper recognition...</p>

<p>Even though I got lucky with my score, I wish MIT would have looked at a 12 or at least consider it...</p>