<p>Hi guys i desperately need your help. Yesterday my parents and i were talking, which escalated into a fight. My parents ended up crying lol. That's not even the "best" part...</p>
<p>They said that if i wanted to go out of state, i would have to go to a direct medical program (BA/MD or BS/MD programs). I said that A) i don't think i have a GOOD shot, not just a shot and B) i want to do undergrad and then go to med school after 4 years of undergrad. </p>
<p>They then said that with my stats, I can get in to UMDNJ, and other med programs. I said, "NO, I cant!" How would they even know that? They don't know my stats and they haven't researched the stats of UMDNJ applicants as well as those of other direct med programs. I researched more than they did and they claim to know more than me! They also said that since im doing well in school now, I might as well take advantage of that and apply. If i were to take the alternative i explained (going to undergrad and then med school), I could potentially worsen and become a drug alcoholic or something and lose that academic prowess i hold in high school.
I then said that i don't want to work all day in college. I want to have some fun too. It was at this point my parents began to cry. I then got REALLY angry and asked them, "You don't want me to have fun?" They said "yes, we do. But not too much to the point that you become a party holic and fail college"
I said "of course im not gonna do that but im tired of working hard like i did in high school to achieve what i have right now"
They then just stared at me, and silence followed the entire room. Fast forward...I eventually gave up and told them i would be applying to direct med programs only. Then the possibility arose of my complete failure to get into all med schools. My parents reassured me that that wouldn't happened and i didn't believe them. They then said, "if you don't get into any med programs, I will force you to go to a state college, from which you will get into a med school."
I said, "why can't i apply to top schools like Yale, Duke, UPENN, columbia, etc" They said it was a waste of money. I then left it at that.</p>
<p>So who do you think is right in this debate?</p>
<p>^the second question describes me better. I am also certain that i want to be a doctor. I’m like one of those guys who just KNOWS. I want to be a neurosurgeon to be more specific</p>
<p>Im somewhat in the same case as you. Though its not as severe as the one you’re going through. I’m a second-generation Asian in my family, and the major(s) I want to pursue in the next few years in university would be history and political science.</p>
<p>I’ve done my research, and I picked schools that have great programs in the majors I listed. Yet my parents aren’t agreeing with me because they think I won’t earn a decent living, and “urged” me to “reconsider”. (yeah, typical Asian parents…lol)</p>
<p>Let your parents know that it isn’t a walk in a park to get into the school that you mentioned (you know this too). Let them know that you know your own capabilities, and don’t want to make them mad by catering to their wishes and apply to a direct med program, but get a rejection in return.</p>
<p>And if you have to, be blunt about it if they are still feeding you their “utopian” views.</p>
<p>@WillDaSnail, I’m exactly like you (interest and situation wise), except that I’m a first generation Asian. @Airfreshener
I think the best thing for you to do is to apply to the direct Med programs but also apply to all the other schools you want to go to (Regular Decision for the UPenn, Yale and all that, so that you don’t disappoint your parents by going to some other school). I mean, it doesn’t hurt to apply to the schools you really want to go to. Assuming, of course, that you have the grades and extracurriculars on my part. If your parents don’t want to help you pay the app fee, get a fee waiver (or get a parttime job and save a couple hundred)</p>
<p>ultimately i think it comes down to whether your parents really support you in all that you do. obviously you want to work hard but you want a social life to because in a well rounded life, that’s also very important. explain this to them.</p>
<p>willdasnail, this applies to you to. i know how asian parents are (im’ asian) and my parents have the same concern seeing that i want to study film (and business) but ultimately they’re not going to force me to do anything. tell your parents that for EVERY field, there’s the possibility that you will struggle in life. however, if you become the best in your field, you will ALWAYS do well in life.</p>
<p>Yeah, that’s true. I think I may have to remind them that even pursuing a career as a doctor does have its hardships along the way.</p>
<p>And since the edit feature isn’t available for me, I just looked up “1st generation” and “second generation” and realized I was a “1st generation” Asian, not second. I apologize for that mistake. Dang mix ups. >_<</p>