My son just finished up his freshman year at Virginia Tech. He is majoring in business information technology and received a 3.70 GPA, making Dean’s List both semesters. As you can see, academics aren’t the issue. The thing is, my son came home from college distraught. He felt extremely pressured the entire year and claims it was the most stressed out he has ever been. He was honest with me and said that he thinks that he started college the wrong way socially and did things to “fit in”. Thus, he has come home with a “taste aversion” to Virginia Tech. I try to talk about his apartment next year and he said he can’t even think about moving in. I’ve told him to make new friends and go about things differently, but I think his problem is the school has officially worn him out and he can’t see himself going back. He loves the professors and what VT has to offer, but he says he cannot handle the high school feel anymore. He comes from an area where almost the entire school system ends up attending Virginia Tech, so I’m sure this has something to do with it.
Without me knowing, he applied to Auburn University. Obviously, this is not the same in terms of academics as Virginia Tech, at least in my opinion. Of course, out of state tuition is another thing to consider. Essentially, we would be paying more money for less of an education. My struggle as a parent is that I want my son to be happy. If VT makes him that miserable, is it wrong for me to enforce him to go back to school there? He is eccentric about Auburn, but is aware of the cost. We currently have aid at VT, and I really do not know how it works when you transfer schools.
I would really appreciate your help. I am seriously stuck and want to make my son as happy as can be. Three more years at a school he feels uncomfortable at is a lot, but the education is amazing. If anybody knows anything about Auburn’s Business School please feel free to share! I appreciate your time.
Some majors at McGill (and certain majors at other Canadian unis) would be almost as cheap as in-state. However, the business school isn’t one of them. Still, he may be able to find a cheap enough option up north. Also, SD Mines has an Engineering Management major. NMTech has both IT and Management majors. Both are quite cheap even for OOS.
Tell him that he has a choice, but you’re not going to pay more for a social experience or particular football team.
Or there are a number of other Virginia schools too, with many different ‘feels’ to them. He shouldn’t return to VT if he feels it is too stressful, but part of being the adult reasonable enough to know that the school isn’t right for him is knowing that finances are a big part of the decision. If his aid was federal (pell) it will likely be the same at another school, but all the aid that came from VT including SEOG if that was part of it, will not transfer and the new school may not offer much.
He might be able to get aid from Auburn. He needs to investigate that ASAP.
If your son is truly unhappy and Auburn turns out to be unaffordable, he may want to run some net price calculators at other schools and see if he can get a better deal. Tell him up front, though, how much you can afford to pay a year. If he can find a good school for the amount you can afford, I’d let him transfer. But since transfers don’t get much aid, he may end up having to look in state. Good luck.
If this is a parent posting, the OP seems to be using the same account as the student. The student in December actually talked about having a blast at school. But has made many posts since then about transferring, to out of state schools. Look to improve the situation at VT or look for another affordable option. Where are you at that “almost the entire school system ends up attending Virginia Tech”? When you’re instate, of course you’re going to run into kids you may know . Doesn’t mean you have to hang with them. Both my kids went to Virginia instate schools but met kids from all over .
If you told him the price limit before (perhaps when he was a high school senior applying for frosh admission to colleges), then you can remind him of that, and that he needs to find the money or a lower cost school to transfer to if Auburn exceeds the price limit.
If Auburn is not affordable then it should not be an option. If he is unhappy at VT then you need to sit down and find some affordable options that might work better for him.
If he is unhappy at VT, and Auburn is unaffordable, then tell him to arrange a leave of absence from VT, and take a year off. During that time he can get some work experience (a good idea for anyone but even more so for a business major), and reconsider his transfer application list with a better eye for affordability.
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My struggle as a parent is that I want my son to be happy. If VT makes him that miserable, is it wrong for me to enforce him to go back to school there? He is eccentric about Auburn, but is aware of the cost. We currently have aid at VT, and I really do not know how it works when you transfer schools.
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Auburn isn’t going to give your son any aid except federal aid…which is: a student loan of $6500. If your EFC is below about 5500, then he’d get a small pell grant.
I hope your son isn’t counting on going to Auburn. Unless you’re prepared to spend $40k+ per year, it’s not affordable.
However, I’m concerned that your son has already cut ties with VT. Has he registered for classes at VT? he needs to.
This is silly. VT is a state school. Auburn is a state school. What difference is your son expecting??? There would be no noticeable difference…they’re both state schools.
how much can you pay each year for college? Have you told your son how much you’ll pay? Does he understand that??
What is your EFC? I’m concerned that your son is wrongly assuming that Auburn is going to give him “free money” to cover the amount between COA and EFC. No, it won’t. Not at all. He wouldn’t even get any kind of merit award.
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Alright, here is my situation. I am only able to apply as a transfer to one of these schools. I’m doing this behind the scenes (my parents don’t know). I can only afford to apply to one. I intend on majoring in information systems.
Things I am considering/things I need to know
Maryland’s business school is highly ranked
I do not know which school is more “mature” in a sense that I am not the biggest partier - pretty much, where will I go to school and not feel discriminated against? That is what I am currently facing at my current university
Pittsburgh is farther away
Maryland is right next to D.C. (internship opportunities, jobs, etc.)
Maryland’s information systems program is very well respected
Maryland might be harder to get in, but Pitt requires my SAT information (1640) - this was back in high school
My stats
Current School: Virginia Tech
Credit Hours Completed: 34 (just finished freshman year)
Overall GPA: 3.70 (first semester = 3.54, second semester = 3.83)
In a fraternity
In a living learning community
Dean’s List both semesters
Varsity captain in high school
**what I think is most important to me, though, is where I will feel like I fit in better. I mean, I’m transferring for a reason. I got a lot of hate for who I was, which irks me because I was the student who worked hard and didn’t see partying as priority.
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You need to use your own acct. You’re using your son’s acct. That is a no no.
“I got a lot of hate for who I was, which irks me because I was the student who worked hard and didn’t see partying as priority.”
You need a new set of friends. If there is too much partying at the frat, drop out (this will also save you a ton of money). Find a quiet corner of the library and do all of your studying there. Eventually you will get to know the other people who study late at the library or who are the student employees who work late there to keep it open for the people who are studying. Chances are that those are your people.
What are you paying for VT? Tell him that you support him transferring if he needs to, but that you are not going to pay any more than you were for VT.
I was being fresh. Clearly this student thinks the grass is greener at Auburn. And it’s not. There are plenty of more affordable options to explore instate in Virginia.
