<p>Sorry if this is long but I could really use some input from others. My son was off to a great start in HS with mostly A's in all honors/AP classes at a competitive private school and good EC's, e.g. president of his class. During the first half of sophomore year, our home life completely crashed. Several family members were arrested/incarcerated in separate incidents, I was injured in an auto accident and another family member at home fell ill and was hospitalized. Also, just prior to the end of the school year I was laid off from my job after 12 years. The stress of everything took a huge toll on my son and he ended up failing the 2nd semester in 4 academic courses, though he did pass AP Euro and got a 4. </p>
<p>He was diagnosed and treated for depression but by the start of junior year he seemed to be doing much better. He was excited about a new school (large public) and signed up for a full load of honors/AP courses and planned to make up the 4 F's (2nd semester only) on FLVS during the summer. Things were going great and he again got all A's 1st semester. But towards the Christmas break his depression came back worse than before to the point where several times I considered inpatient treatment for him. He ended up withdrawing from school and did not receive grades for 2nd semester. He again recovered this summer and decided he wanted to try to go back for senior year and finish on time if possible. This time he is in standard classes except for AP Lit, but will be adding 2nd semester APUSH and AP Lang which he thinks he can do well in. His GPA prior to senior year including the 4 F's from sophomore year is 3.2 UW/3.7 W. He just took the SAT yesterday for the first time and feels confident that he did well, predicting a score around 2000-2100. </p>
<p>He's been thinking about what to do for next year but at the same time his primary focus is just to be able to graduate this year on time. I do see a huge difference in him and I am hoping and praying that he has finally overcome this, but I'll be holding my breath until we get through next semester. He said he absolutely does not want to get stuck in community college next year especially after experiencing standard classes this year. His guidance counselor wants him to apply to our local state school, UNF, now without test scores and the transcript as is since the priority deadline is next week. He really wants to go away for school and is not thrilled with the idea of UNF. He's interested in UCF or FSU if he could get in. He went to a summer camp at FSU and loved it. Before all of this happened, his list included schools like Vanderbilt, Emory, Tulane, and U of Miami. I am wondering if he would be better off taking a gap year and applying after he graduates with all of his courses completed, a solid senior year behind him and a better overall GPA. Would he have a chance at any of these schools then? Does he have a chance at FSU or even UCF now? I think a gap year might be a good option for him if he could find something interesting to do before committing to college and potentially having any more setbacks. Also, he really doesn't want to just go anywhere he can get accepted with the idea to transfer somewhere he'd be happier later. Last, money is an issue as our EFC is 0, he is first generation, and he's bi-racial if that makes any difference. Any suggestions?</p>
<p>Wow – that’s a whole lot to deal with – it sounds like you’re both coping pretty darned well given everything.</p>
<p>How does he feel about taking a gap year – I agree that it could be both a great breather for him and allow colleges to see how he does senior year. However, I don’t know how FSU looks at grades – University of California, for example, is really only looking at 9th-11th, so doing much better as a senior isn’t so helpful.</p>
<p>One thing that struck me reading the original post is that the depression could be seasonally related, possibly due to there being more sunlight during fall semester than there is at the beginning of the spring semester i.e. winter). I’m no expert, but maybe some “light therapy” or something might help even things out.</p>
<p>I can’t address some of your questions but I wanted to tell you that my experience with a kid who was sort of skewed because of a low gpa first 3 semesters (because of something that was absolutely not her fault and was explained) was that top schools didn’t touch her but big state schools gave her scholarship money. I think the top schools may have been nervous about how the student will handle the increased pressure of college. Anyway, said kid attended a big state school (out-of-state fwiw) and then transferred to a top private uni. </p>
<p>If this were my son, I would have him apply to FSU and UCF. Does your school have Naviance? It looks like a student with those stats would be accepted at both from my kids’ school. </p>
<p>Also, I would try to make sure my son had an ongoing relationship with a mental health counselor that he could call at college should the depression strike again.</p>
<p>Gap year might be a good thought. Gives him time to get things settled down a bit. Or , he could consider a smaller FL school (Eckerd, New School, Flagler, etc) and then transfer later.</p>
<p>Don’t try to decide about a gap year just yet. Just keep the options open and decide when you have to. Apply now and see if he gets in. Then decide based on how he’s feeling, doing in school, and where he gets in.</p>
<p>I understand the skepticism that could be inherent in that question… Sometimes there are ■■■■■■.</p>
<p>OTOH, this is a site which is readily found on any kind of google search when seeking advice about “all things college.” I can well understand how a parent would find the site, spend some time reading, see the wealth of information and experience that is shared as well as the insight and support from other parent posters… and tell a story in hopes of getting real assistance.</p>
<p>i smell a ■■■■■ too. especially when the kid’s ethnicity was thrown in (which seems irrelevant here). whew!! but i guess since i’m human i could be wrong. lol</p>
<p>just seems that there’s so much chaos that college admissions would be the last thing on this family’s mind.</p>
<p>I wonder if a gap year is something to avoid in this case–clearly a bright kid who can do well if he’s got a safe situation—and who probably takes confidence from academic success. A gap year might just allow him to slip further into depression, whereas at the right school he might well settle in and begin to feel secure and calm enough to concentrate on his studies. Just a thought.</p>
<p>To the OP…if your EFC is $0, you will need a plan to pay for college as well. It doesn’t sound like your son’s GPA is sufficiently high to qualify for Bright Futures. So…please, when you are considering colleges, consider how the costs will be met.</p>
<p>Re: other issues posted. This students mental health issues need to be very closely monitored. In reading the first post, I have to wonder whether this student had an ongoing relationship with a mental health professional. It sounds like that isnt the case or the depression issue should have been better “monitored” for prevention the second time around. </p>
<p>Personally I would want to feel confident that these issues were under control for this student AND that ongoing support was established and in place for him BEFORE he enrolls in college.</p>
<p>I think a gap year is a good idea- especially if it is something that is fairly structured like Americorps or City Year.
First gen students need more support with college IMO & City Year helped my daughter gain the experience and maturity that she needed to be successful in a very stressful college.
( plus they receive an education voucher for tuition/loans)</p>
<p>I actually think that some “■■■■■” inquiries MIGHT prove helpful to some real parental concerns regardless of the specifics. It’s not lke we need to know that some members of the family apparently went to jail (especially since it doesn’t seem to be a parent). OTOH, a lot of kids hit the wall in HS and it seems to me that when you are seeking help for your kid, to find a place like this would be a Godsend.</p>
<p>Thank you for your thoughtful and helpful responses. I guess having this as a first post makes some question if this is a ■■■■■. I have been reading this forum for some time, but I’ve never actually posted anything anywhere online before. Sorry if I’m not doing it right. I have seen some postings here meant to provoke, but why anyone would think I would write something so personal like this as ■■■■■ is beyond me. It is a lot to deal with, but he’s a great kid and I want him to have every chance to succeed. I just thought the more background the better the responses. I’ve seen some people post very little detail and get “sorry can’t help you without the whole picture” responses. Oh well, damned if you do, damned if you don’t.</p>
<p>Regarding mental health treatment, he has been getting ongoing treatment ever since this first began two years ago. At first his doctors and I thought the depression was situational for obvious reasons but after the second depressive episode they think that he’s prone to having more episodes like this in the future and we’ll always have to watch for signs of it occurring again. That’s why I am very nervous about what he does next year. I don’t want him too far away or in a situation where he can’t cope. They ruled out bipolar because he never gets the manic highs, he’s just either ok or really low. The suggestion about it possibly being seasonal related and light therapy for it is something I will definitely bring up at his next appointment. I too had noticed that both episodes happened at around the same time each year but didn’t really think about it being seasonal since we are in FL and because the 1st time happened during all the chaos.</p>
<p>For bright futures, I was assuming that as long as he makes up the required courses by the end of the year and that he does well on the SAT he would be eligible. He already has the volunteer hours needed. I think that while the F’s still show up on his transcript, I know his school will use the new grades to recalculate his GPA. Does anyone know if bright futures does the same, or if you failed once you have no chance? I can’t access facts.org as it was ‘locked’ by guidance when he withdrew last year and I am getting the runaround from them trying to get access to it.</p>
<p>Regarding the additional information on EFC, race, 1st gen at the end of my post, I added that because it is relevant to know that we don’t have the resources for a lot of options and also in case some schools might be willing to consider or have special aid for a kid with his background. For instance, after speaking to his guidance counselor last week, he told us about a local program that I was not aware that my son would be eligible for that could cover costs at UNF that would not be met by other aid.</p>
<p>My gut tells me that UNF would be the best option because of course as a nervous parent I want him home where I can monitor and help him if needed. But at the same time this is something he will have to potentially deal with and manage throughout his life and he needs to learn how to recognize and handle it on his own.</p>
<p>I didn’t think you were a ■■■■■, and didn’t understand why anyone would. And I do think going with your gut makes sense-- you know him and the situation. As for the depression-- maybe he will deal with it all his life (so many do)-- but the holidays are classic times for people with family troubles to get depressed, because their losses stand out more clearly against all festivity. And also if this is the time of year the original troubles started, there would be an ‘anniversary effect’. A college close by could give him a new atmosphere to start fresh in, with you nearby for moral support etc-- sounds very sane to me.</p>
<p>Just a contrarian thought here… if the problems arose from a chaotic home life, perhaps clearing some distance from home would be better for him.</p>
<p>OP, your last paragraph @ post 15 would be my advice. I think you have to be very careful if someone has a tendency to depression to not put that person in a situation that will push him into depression. I can’t speak to any of the particular schools that you note, but as a parent I would want to be close enough to be of use if need be, and would not want any schools that are particularly known to give low grades or be pressure cookers.</p>