Not Enjoying the Social Scene

<p>Hey, I'm a second year student at a large public university, and a lot of the people act cold and mean. Let me give you an example. I recently participated in a charity event at our school with another group of girls. The girls wouldn't talk to me at all and pretty much ignored me. They weren't talkative anyway but they definitely didn't warm up to my attempts at conversation. Needless to say, I felt pretty awkward and uncomfortable at the event. I've felt isolated from day 1 at big state U. Does anybody else here feel the same way, or am I the only one?</p>

<p>Well, I can say that I am lucky in the fact that my college (RIT) had "learning communities" which are groups of students who are in the same or similar major and have the same classes together. It allows you to socialize work together in groups. </p>

<p>I wouldn't base the sociability of other students by one situation but I would suggest looking into transferring if you feel uncomfortable or awkward.</p>

<p>I know I'm at a mid sized public (16,000) and I'm transferring ASAP. People are just unapproachable and frankly, I don't even WANT to approach most of them. I want to find a slightly smaller school where people are interested in forging strong friendships. I want a real community. Seems like you understand. Where are you?</p>

<p>I don't know if it's just me, but I never had this experience at my medium-large public university (24,000). I've made some really excellent friends here. Maybe it's just being in the South where people are almost always friendly and say excuse me, thank you, and please, and hold the door open for you and everything, but I've never really had the whole people being mean and cold, even strangers. I'm really sorry you've had this experience. Perhaps you should think about transferring to a smaller university/college where you would have more personal interactions with people in class and such.</p>

<p>I think the climate changes from department to department, too...some of the art disciplines tend to be more cliquey, the "heady" disciplines more aloof. Some of the best friends I have are education and urban planning majors.</p>

<p>Sounds like you should study more. Or join a sorority.</p>

<p>That's definitely unfortunate, but I wouldn't blame it on the large public-school factor. My university has 38,000 undergrads and I haven't felt what you have... though I know people at other publics and small prestigious privates that have.</p>

<p>Just saying this so that you, or someone else reading this, doesn't completely shy away from large or public universities. Maybe if you check out a school with a lot of school-spirit you'll feel more of a bond with people? Or simply try and find a new niche in your current university.</p>

<p>my university has a total of about ~1600 students INCLUDING grad. Guess what, I can recognize at least 200 or even more. and I have some "acquaintances" who are at least 3- 4 years older than me. But overall, the social life sucks because its a "hello" and "bye" environment.</p>

<p>I know exactly how you feel. You might as well be from another planet, your interests, personalities, etc. are just so different from the majority of the student body. It's weird, as soon as I step on campus I just feel so different, like a fish out of water, but when I go back home for breaks, I have a much easier time interacting with people.</p>

<p>Just use Friday and Saturday nights to work on your transfer application essays and concentrate on school. That's what I'm doing. Aside from 5-6 friends that I talk to regularly, I pretty much just throw on headphones, get my work done, and zone out the rest of the campus. </p>

<p>I mean, even if I do talk with people, there's nothing to talk about, besides the weather.</p>

<p>I wouldn't worry too much about it, in my experiences, the best places to meet people are in your classes. Just forgo most of the little "social" events since it sounds like the people there aren't worth your time. After all, it's not like you don't have the Internet.</p>

<p>OP did you vist the campus before you decided to attend there?</p>

<p>I'm not particularly satisfied with my social life either. I spent this Friday night working out, doing laundry, and reading for my French class. Oh well.</p>

<p>^^ ur at yale? no social life?</p>