Parent Insanity

Applying to College
1

<p>Hi all,</p>

<p>My dad decided to email my ED school without consulting or even mentioning it to me asking about rushing SAT scores. In the email, he explicitly mentioned my name, following by sending the name under HIS name. Needless to say, I'm really mad at him, but does this reflect badly to admission? I'm applying to a small LAC with like 500-odd ED applicants, so take that into account if this can affect my decision (i.e. making me look like dependent on my parents to do my apps for me).</p>

<p>This is actually so infuriating....</p>

2

<p>As a parent, I can see why you are so frustrated. There is plenty of written material available explaining why the student, not the parent, should be the one to take the lead.
I suggest that you take a day or two (or however long it takes) to really calm down. When your dad is in a good mood, do the classic “praise-criticism-praise” sandwich. Sample: "Dad, I’m really grateful that you care enough about me to be involved in my college applications. But I’m concerned that it actually could do more harm than good when it comes to getting into top schools. According to everything I’ve read, it’s really important that I, not you, be the person who contacts the schools with questions or information. I promise to make these contacts in a timely manner, and I’ll let you know how the process is going. If you can respect this, it will mean a lot to me. Thanks, Dad. I love you [hug].</p>

3

<p>Thanks a lot for the advice, I will certainly use it tomorrow. However, my worry now is how I rectify this specific situation.</p>

4

<p>He asked **one **simple question in an email. Not a big deal! The people reading the applications will not know about it. they are probably not on the front lines of answering the emails and phones.
If he were to be in constant communication with them, then that might be a problem. If he calls up the week after you applied and said “My son Jimmy just got the award for best attendance, you should really admit him!” - that would be a problem.
But he does need to chill and let you handle the communications unless he knows that you are a total nincompoop and you don’t seem like one.
You can all laugh about this later :-)</p>

5

<p>This is not the first time the college has seen something like this, it won’t be the last. It does not reflect on you at all.</p>

6

<p>Okay, great! Thanks for the advice. I had an additional question anyways, so I ended up emailing the admissions officer/general email anyways and apologized for not directly contacting them regarding my first issue.</p>