Somebody mentioned the Consumer Reports senior care article upthread - thank you! It is excellent. Picked a copy up at the book store yesterday after I just happened to spot CR.
rosered55, a blood infection = sepsis, which is what my father passed from:
https://www.sepsis.org/sepsis/definition/#
IMHO, they let him out of the hospital too early. If you read the website, it takes a really long time to recover, even a young healthy person.
How to prevent it depends on how she got it. If she has bedsores, that’s a possible route. Foley catheter is another possible route. Any kind of abrasion or wound. If someone’s wearing diapers, well most of us know what that is like when your kid starts getting really rare and bleeding around thereabouts. E coli is in our gut and all around us, but really bad if it gets in our bloodstream.
Just received Oct 2017 Kiplinger’s Personal Finance. Cover article is 12 ways to make your retirement savings last as long as you do. One of the items was plan for health care costs - "Fidelity Investments estimates that the average 65-year-old couple retiring now will need about $260,000 to pay out-of-pocket helath care costs, including deductibles and Medicare premiums, over the rest of their lives. That doesn’t include long-term care…:
Keep reading and staying educated/making decisions…
So, we are worried sick about MIL in a nursing home in south Florida (Broward County) with Irma apparently barreling to Florida.
I am haunted by that pic of the nursing home residents from Harvey. 
MIL is severely disabled and not easy to move or relocate.
Any ideas, prayers, vibes - all greatly appreciated.
@SouthFloridaMom9 has the nursing home communicated to family members anything?
My parents CCRC has a branch in Houston and all those residents were evacuated to another company property in advance of Harvey. I would hope your relatives place would have a similar plan in place.
Thank you @surfcity.
The update is that they have a generator, and an extensive evacuation plan in the (unlikely?) event that one is necessary. They claim that they were open even through Andrew and its aftermath.
??
We’re in Broward County, just north of Miami. We are actually planning to go stay with my mother at her independent living facility. She was hospitalized this past weekend and isn’t 100% yet. She needs a walker but lives on the 4th floor so will need a lot of help. We’d bring her to our house (we live in the same town) but our house is very close to the beach while her apartment is about 3 miles inland. Our neighborhood is required to evacuate in a category 3 or above but her neighborhood is not. They have generators and are likely to get power restored sooner than most homes because of their special circumstances. We’ve stocked up on food and water and battery-powered lights and radios so we’ll just bring it all to her place.
The alternative was either packing her up in the car and trying to drive somewhere (where??) or getting on a plane. But she’s almost 96, very fragile, semi-incontinent and has memory issues. That would be a logistical nightmare.
My thoughts are with all of you helping your elders through the literal and metaphorical storms. So many challenges and no crystal balls on any front. Transporting frail elders is often off the table; only can do the best thing possible given unknown circumstances. Hoping the impact of this storm is minimal. My mil is disabled in a nursing home on the west coast of FL near St Pete. She has yet to need to evacuate, but it is always a concern during hurricane season.
@SouthFloridaMom9 and @patsmom - keep us posted. Sending positive thoughts.
Thinking about you @patsmom!
Well, it appears that the forwarding of the mail has finally kicked in! No more mail being delivered to my parents’ home that no one lives in any more, it’s all being forwarded to a safe place where it can be reviewed and they can be given the important pieces (trashing all the junk catalogs and solicitations for over-priced garbage). I had to fight with FedEx, who didn’t want to stop trying to deliver to an empty house. I told two of their employees in two separate phone calls, “No one lives there and no one wants the package–return to sender.” They said I couldn’t say that, the recipient had to. I repeated, “No one lives there and no one wants the package. Return to sender.” Finally, he said, OK then and hung up.
My cousin decided to stay put in Tampa with my elderly aunt. Going somewhere was too difficult. Thinking of your Floridians!
I can’t even imagine dealing the frail elders in the face of this storm.
In other news, after 3.5 years in assisted living and 1.5 in memory care my Mom passed away this morning. The memory care staff cried, she was one of their favorites. I blessed hospice for helping us ease her way and not having to have needles and all. It took a while, I’ve been in old home town for six days…and nights spent watching her breaths. My brother was with me after the first night so we could have shifts. I do not know how anyone could do this alone! Both our spouses were not here, which was good for us since both spouses had some mother in law issues that might have cropped up…
Anyway this is my first service as the matriarch and funeral planner. Going to have later celebration of life so not rushed. Any tips or advise for this stage of caring appreciated. I think the estate will be easy as everything was in the trust and my brother and I have cleaned up lots of loose ends over the past five years while I was guardian. Bless her pre planning for that, it was a huge gift. I don’t think the estate will be complicated and the houses contents were dealt with when she moved into AL.
You have my sympathy, @esobay. My only tips are to be kind to yourself and to accept that whatever feelings you have are okay.
Sorry for your loss @esobay. I have never planned a service so I can’t be much help there. Thank you for all you have share in this journey. It has been so helpful to me.
Hugs @esobay and my condolences for your loss. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
My condolences. As for the service, if you mom belonged to a house of worship before moving to assisted living, consider contacting it. The clergy might be willing to preside and can give you advice. The hospice staff should also be able to guide you towards a funeral home, etc. If your dad/mom was a vet, you are entitled to a free burial (still have to provide the casket and pay the funeral parlor) at a veteran’s cemetery.
I planned my aunt’s funeral a few years ago. She wasn’t religious but when my grandma (her mom) died, my aunt got a rabbi, so I got one for my aunt through the funeral home. She was entitled to the military funeral, which she wanted. Unfortunately, and fortunately, the cemetery she picked was unavailable as my aunt lived such a long life that the place filled up without her! She is in a different cemetery. She didn’t want me to sit shiva, so I did what Catholics in my area do which is have a luncheon at a restaurant.
Again, my condolences to you and your family.
My condolences @esobay! I haven’t planned a funeral so no advice.
My dad became very confused and cranky this week (more than usual) they decided maybe it was a UTI so started him on an antibiotic which seems to have helped. Amazing how it effects them so remarkably.
My condolences, esobay. So glad you and your brother could be there.
So sorry for your loss, esobay. Glad you and your brother could support each other at this time.
So sorry for your loss, @esobay. It is a poignant time.
I planned a memorial service for my father that took place 3 months after his death so all family could attend. It was less hectic to pull together than my mother’s funeral several days after her death. Relevant professionals are prepared to turn on a dime for funerals; it will work out. I scheduled after conferring with involved family members, asked people for assistance according to their affinities. One adult grandchild has a passion for music, so she helped choose appropriate service songs. I coordinated service, poems, readings and a post-service lunch at at a restaurant in the town he was buried in. No relatives lived nearby.
Take good care of yourself and ask questions as they arise. We are here.