My uncle died of early onset dementia. He was a poet and academic, and his deterioration was horrible to observe. I a sorry about your neighbor.
GT alum that may have been the same surgeon: we were lucky to find one with that interest. Anyone who needs a colorectal surgeon with that philosophy, feel free to PM me!
Ugh my mother is now developing lymphedema, severe, in her left leg. The back of the thigh and calf are so swollen they are rock hard. She has trouble getting up, and getting into bed, and walking. This was attributed to pressure on the lymphatic system from the inflamed diverticula(e?), which has also attached itself to the colon on the opposite side and possibly other structures. But since going on Cipro and Flagyl the swelling is so much worse, that I wonder if it is somehow also related to the meds. Lots of medical folks tomorrow. I am starting to fear this will be just as bad as cancer. Once the meds are done, I am going to get her on hospice.
Sorry to hear this, @compmom. Glad you will have some of the needed input tomorrow and hope that she is comfortable. So many challenges; take care of you, too.
We have a friend whose dad has lymphedemia. It is very challenging. 
He’s supposed to do regular PT but finds that very hard. He’s currently in the hospital battling multiple infections. :-&
@compmom, with lymphedema beware of cellulitis. If the leg gets red with a rash and there is a fever and aches, it could be cellulitis, which requires heavy duty antibiotics.
Lymphatic massage and compression bandages/sleeves are typically used to help the drainage.
Good luck and take care. If it’s not one thing, it’s another.
Yes the friend’s relative has a cellulitis infection that I’m told is very painful and a stubborn infection. He’s on IV antibiotics. The hospital has been trying for several days to figure out the right antibiotic combo.
Thanks for the warnings on infection. I have seen the images. I would say my mother is stage 3, not stage 4 yet.
We know what to do but assisted living certainly won’t help and my mother’s dementia is a problem with any regimen. I am attempting to get her to wear a compression glove and every time I turn around it is off! Ditto compression stockings. Or she pulls them down part way and there are tight seams that dig into the edema, leaving deep gouges, the worst thing ever.
The tissues are so hard that I cannot massage it and need a person who is expert in that. Next step is to find someone who specializes in lymphedema.
And call the surgeon who said this is from the diverticulitis, which is attached to organs across the pelvis and putting pressure on the lymphatic system. It started off with swelling in the back calf that was diagnosed as a burst Baker’s cyst on ultrasound but the surgeon said no, it’s from diverticulitis, and now that the thigh is so swollen it is clear she is right.
We are fortunate in having a visiting nurse who is excellent, a surgeon who we really like who will help diagnose cause, and Palliative Care involved as well. I have a call in to hospice as well. Once the antibiotics are done with (another week) that will be appropriate.
We see the cardiologist who will freak out when he sees her ankles. I am going to have to get her to show him her legs and explain. It would be nice to have surgeon notes for him and I might be able to get them before the appt.
Thanks again and good luck to all with whatever you are dealing with today.
@compmom, I know it won’t help (not at all!) with toileting issues, but they make compression pantihose that maybe she couldn’t pull down.
My dad had intermittent bouts of cellulitis for years until he got compression stockings. But he was compliant.
Good luck and (((((hugs)))))! It can be so overwhelming when the medical issues are falling like dominoes. You are such a good daughter!
OOH compression panty hose. Great idea! Thanks!!
I imaging trying to do this yourself would be impossible. Therapists who deal with lymphedema are fantastic, but there are not that many. So sorry this symptom had to crop up unexpectedly. Hang in there!
My grandma has not left the house since I left here in September. I’m a bit ticked at her docs as she has been complaining that her back hurts for many months. Well they finally figured out she has fractures. They did X-rays, and either an mri or catscan when I was there before and claimed they didn’t see anything. I thought maybe she had fallen and didn’t remember, but it seems these are common due to bone loss.
Has anyone dealt with this? They have moved her to a rehab facility but is that the only treatment, therapy? Obviously there will be no surgery at age 89.
Are they compression or stress fractures? More than likely compression fx. Both are treated conservatively at first. Physical therapy, pain control with NSAID, (watching for constipation and stomach problems), sometimes a back brace if tolerated well and if not already taking- start course of calcium, vitamin D supplements and a medication to treat osteoporosis. Hope she will respond quickly. So sorry she suffered pain for so long.
@ECmotherx2 Thanks for the info. Her back had been hurting for many months then She was hospitalized in sept, basically with severe constipation. She still complained her back hurt and the docs blew it off as gas. I’m so angry she has been suffering for so long. She was moved yesterday to a rehab facility so I’m flying out in the morning to check on the facility and her. I really wish she and her older sister would move to Ohio. I feel that when you are that old some docs don’t necessarily listen.
@partyof5 so sorry to hear your grandmother is suffering from what sounds like compression fractures. Typically these can be seen on an x-ray and may not be present at one time and then can be seen later. @ECmotherx2 is correct as to the treatment. So hard to be away from our aging relatives. You are such an attentive granddaughter.
I would like to share a story that happened to my father last winter so that it doesn’t happy to anyone else. My dad was a very healthy 86 years old He hiked down into the Grand Canyon at both 79 & 80 taking the north rim (the harder trail) the second time. I have a photo of him using a rototiller just last fall. He still mowed his own lawn.
He had back pain starting around November. He went to his kidney doctor who said, “Kidney disease doesn’t cause back pain. You’re just old.” He continue to endure the pain and assumed it was some sort of injury that would pass. Christmas came and he was in a lot of pain. He had a fall on the last day of the year and because he was on blood thinner he needed a few stitches. While we were at the E.R. we mentioned the back pain. After an x-ray, an orthopedic who we never saw said it was compression fractures. This was a misdiagnosis and what they saw were old injuries.
My dad continued to get worse and after about 10 days a young woman who had only been a doctor for four years knew something wasn’t right and ordered and MRI. My dad had an abscess on his spine and needed neurosurgery. He was transferred to a larger hospital, made it through surgery but it was too late. After a few days the infection was retuning and we went through the entire process of horrific pain all over again. My father died because he needed an anti-bioitic. If the kidney doctor, or the misdiagnosis of compression fractures, had not happened, my dad would still be with us.
This has been heartbreaking to see a man who was still living a full life pass on because he was dismissed as “being old.” The head of infectious diseases at the second hospital told us that people do not die of this and typically an antibiotic takes care of it. But we were too late. Push for the MRI. Push for care. We learned a lot about the healthcare system. I don’t want this to happen to anyone else.
@Empireapple , I don’t want this to have happened to you either. I am very sorry for your loss and the extra pain of preventable loss. Thank you for the PSA.
I often think that every older person needs to hire a younger advocate to go in and press the health care people for the “old” person. White hair means you are stupid and old too many times.
Elderly need a patient advocate as much as a young child.
Many physicians look at the common most likely answer. They often don’t go through as thorough of a process as they should. If something isn’t quite right, need to continue to evaluate possibilities.
However, don’t go ‘over the top’. A resident’s grand-daughter insists her grandmother needs her pills crushed. GM swallows them fine - but when GD is in the room, I will crush the pills!
I do think there is a fine line between supporting and advocating for the person, on one hand, and violating the person’s autonomy, on the other. I’m working on this with my mom. For example, before a recent medical appointment at which I accompanied my mom, one of my brothers said I should ask the doctor about the fact that she stopped wearing the compression stockings her GP said she should keep wearing for a year. Earlier in this medical saga (knee replacement surgery), my sister scolded me for even broaching the possibility of me directly asking the doctors questions. So this time, when my mom and I were waiting for the surgeon to arrive, I said to her, “One of the siblings thinks I should ask about the compression stockings. I’m telling you this so you can decide whether to ask.” My mom immediately and correctly identified which sibling had raised the issue, made a face, but then did ask the surgeon about the issue.
Heck, I bring DH with me to major doctor appointments. Better to have two sets of ears and an advocate who will be tenacious if I find it too difficult.
Have also gone to Dr appts with my FIL, who is hard of hearing and also what he wants to hear. He may say the Dr says his hand will be fine in a couple months, but I hear the doc saying it will be a couple months before we know if there even be any improvement after the hand surgery.
My dad’s medical care is all done at an Army hospital, which makes it pretty much impossible to get any feedback or to even attend an appointment.
I spent yesterday with my grandma and it was heartbreaking to say the least. She is in a long term care facility while she rehabs. Honestly I’m not sure she will get better. During the hospitalization in September she weighed 130, she is now down to 115.
The social worker has informed us she cannot live alone. Some of you may recall, on my “taking the car” thread that she lives in a two family with her 92 year old sister with grandma living upstairs. My mother is prepared to take her back to Ohio but my great aunt doesn’t want that. She is prepared to move my grandma downstairs. They’ve been together their whole lives except for maybe 3-4 years. I don’t think it will be much different than normal as my grandma would make breakfast and hang out downstairs all day anyway. It tore me up to see my grandma , so frail. I know this is the circle of life, and I know that I am beyond blessed to still have a grandma with her siblings living at age 52, but the tears have been flowing. My other grandma passed two years ago, so I’m struggling big time.