Parents: Do not do this to your kids!

Cali, I just want you to have that back-up, if everything goes to hell. If that’s commuting to Albany, great. None of us knows what your parents truly can afford or why they take their position- but many of us do know the personal fears the money just isn’t there. Most of us had our moments of praying for a good turn-out. Some were lucky. Some came to compromises. We want this to work for you, without, ha, having to enlist.

This is getting worse and worse. Now the consultant has led your mother to think there’s a chance that Northwestern is suddenly going to make the offer tens of thousands of dollars better. This. Will. Not. Happen.

You’re going backwards here instead of forwards.

It is very possible that NU will increase your aid…a tiny bit. But I agree with Cardinal Fang. They are not going to give you tens of thousands of dollars more aid. And they will not give you a nickel of need based aid to cover your family comtribution…which right now is in the $30,000 range, right?

I think when all of this is clarified with NU, you need to also ask a very imoortant question:

“How will my family contribution be affected when my sibling is not attending college concurrent with my enrollment here…assuming my other financial parameters remain the same?”

If NU says your family contribution will be double when your sibling is no longer in college, you need that to be VERY clear to your parents…both mom and DAD. And yes, I’m yelling, because your dad needs to be involved in this decision as well.

You say your parents don’t understand this well. Please do NOT let them believe that whatever NU gives you this year will remain the same once your sibling is no longer in college. Because that is not going to be the case.

It looks like both you and your mother are heavily invested in the hope that Northwestern will up its financial aid offer by a lot.

But have you and she discussed whether she will contribute the relatively small amount of money needed to make one of the SUNYs affordable to you?

When @CaliCash’s dad retires in a year or two, won’t that lower her EFC?

is the sibling paying back bc of poor results at a better school initially? Is that why your parents have been so edgy about this entire process? They feel like they wasted money on your sister?

Retiring mid-stream would be tough as FA would be calculated based on the previous year so you would have a year of costs based on peak earnings when the income was dramatically reduced.

@‌gearmom Just retiring doesnt matter. What will matter is the family income at that time. If the parent is receiving retirement income, that counts as income.

Perhaps, but the amount of money available to the household will likely go down by a larger amount.

It is your responsibility NOT YOUR PARENTS to pay for your college education. How many scholarships did you apply for? How much prep did you do for the SAT? How much did you study to have a high GPA.

My parents make over $100,000 so I am not eligible for need aid. I applied to over 20 schools, received 8 FULL TUITION scholarships and have received an additional $40,000 in outside scholarships (after applying for over 50 different scholarships) which will cover most all the room and board for four years.

Don’t expect your parents to pay for YOUR COLLEGE EDUCATION, if you can’t afford certain colleges, go to community college, take a year off and work your butt off in two jobs and pay YOUR OWN WAY

@jpinelands You also applied to 28 schools. You’re bound to strike oil when you shotgun.

@jpinelands I think that CaliCash is doing the best that she can. She did apply to a range of colleges and got as much merit scholarship as she could.

Seriously people, is there any reason to freak out about this. Let things shake out now that there is some communication in her family. I’m sure Calicash understands her limited options if there is no help.

@jpinelands’ strategy is irrelevant in this thread. Cali applied where she applied and has the results she has. She can’t get in a time machine and study more for the SAT two years ago, or apply to more schools last fall. She now needs to look to the future and decide what to do.

@saintfan He would have to retire when the other sibling is still in college.

Depends on where the shotgun is aimed.

With stats that put you in the running for Northwestern, you could have aimed at a few automatic full ride safeties so that you would have options when your mother finally decided to contribute $0 after being vague about it.

@"Cardinal Fang"‌ I was providing an example of something unlikely but was not impossible. I’m not saying it’s gonna happen and I’m not expecting that.

I could’ve said that I want Syracuse to offer me a full tuition scholarship.

Is it likely? No.

Is it impossible? No, it isn’t.

Just an example to show how they believe.

Jpinelands- kudo’s to you for your excellent results. I would not have wanted my kids to apply to 20+ schools but I’m glad it worked for you. I also would not have wanted them at Community College (if they didn’t want to be there) since we could afford to pay tuition at college’s which were better academic and intellectual fits for them. No knock on CC’s- they are terrific for some kids, not terrific for others.

Calicash- big hug. You are keeping your composure in an admirable way throughout this process and I know you are going to have a stellar college experience wherever you end up!

That is right, accepted to all 28. It is about taking charge, having a plan and then executing. Eight FULL TUITION SCHOLARSHIPS. I knew going in that I would only to go a college that provided full tuition. Is my top choice one of those 8. No! But it will be hard to decide between the eight schools left in the mix…

Why would you expect your parents to pay anything for YOUR college education? You should have had a better plan.

@ucbalumnus I had no way of knowing that I would be in this position right now. Could I have done things differently? Sure, but I can’t now. So I see no need to go back in time. I need to move forward.

@jpinelands Again, I can’t go back in time. Why would I, a minor and dependent, expect my parents to pay for my education? Hmmm… I couldn’t imagine a reason. I don’t see why you need to berate me. You did something that worked for you. Congrats. I don’t see how your strategy is in anyway relevant to my situation right now.