<p>Shrinkrap, my understanding is that Smitty is entering her junior year in college. If she moves into the dorm, she will still need a place to live during school breaks (my kid’s college closed the dorms to everyone during winter break) and next summer, between junior and senior year. Dad is saying that if she moves into the dorm, she can’t live at home during these times. At least that’s the way I read the message.</p>
<p>I have a friend who had overbearing and controlling parents. She and her brother were not “allowed” to move out of the house until marriage. She ended up getting married to the first guy who asked her just so she could move out. Her brother–well, he’s 50 years old and still living at home. He’s been so beaten down by his mother over the years that he’s a psychological prisoner to her. My advice—move on campus so you can begin to lead the life of a typical 21 year old. Make friends, socialize, become independent, and stay up past 10pm. That’s when most of the fun happens!</p>
<p>In the coming days/weeks, sit down with your parents and explain your reasons for moving on campus. Remind them that this is a time for you to develop the skills needed to successfully stand on your own two feet. Bring up the fact that the commute is expensive, time consuming, and more dangerous than a 5 minute walk back to a dorm room. Let them know that you’ll come home to visit on the weekends ONCE IN A WHILE. See what happens. Good luck.</p>
<p>“Shrinkrap, my understanding is that Smitty is entering her junior year in college. If she moves into the dorm, she will still need a place to live during school breaks (my kid’s college closed the dorms to everyone during winter break) and next summer, between junior and senior year. Dad is saying that if she moves into the dorm, she can’t live at home during these times.”</p>
<p>I see. "Coming back to live " read a little differently to me.</p>
<p>Hoo boy. One of my D’s roommates in college had been told to “clear out everything she owned” because she was l8.</p>
<p>Their little dorm room was gridlocked with her boxes, piled to the ceiling. Dorm rooms aren’t meant for that.</p>