PLEASE GRADE MY ACT ESSAY?!

<p>Prompt: The Children’s Internet Protection Act (CIPA) requires all school libraries receiving certain federal funds to install and use blocking software to prevent students from viewing material considered “harmful to minors.” However, some studies conclude that blocking software in schools damages educational opportunities for students, both by blocking access to Web pages that are directly related to the state-mandated curriculums and by restricting broader inquiries of both students and teachers. In your view, should the schools block access to certain Internet Web sites?</p>

<p>Essay:</p>

<p>The internet is one of the most powerful educational resources today. With software and websites that can help a student in his learning process both inside and outside of the classroom, the process by which he learns is at a different and better place today than it was 50 years ago. But, with virtue comes vice. Although the internet can be a great, educational, and positive thing, it is also home to many inappropriate and harmful sites deemed "harmful to minors". These things can be detrimental to a student. This is why schools should block access to certain websites and software.
Temptation. Kids have been faced with it for ages. What would stop little Mikey from opening up a risky social media site while doing his trigonometry homework? Few things. The solution to this problem is simple: block sites that aren't purely educational.
Some people may argue that blocking certain sites or software can damage educational opportunities for students, but I do not believe this to be true. Although no safety filter is flawless, by having one that is a little bit too stringent you are being guaranteed that your students will be working on purely academically related sites and software. This also provides the teacher with a sense of peace and time that he or she can spend personally assisting other students, grading papers, or making lesson plans because he or she does not have to worry about having to hover over any computer screens to make sure her class is on task.
Beneficial to the teachers? Yes. But this can also be beneficial to the students. If students have no choice but to be on task online doing safe, academic things then they will undoubtedly do so. Not only will software blocking keep students on task, but it will alsokeep them from the dangers that lurk on the internet such as sexual predators and scams.
In conclusion, schools should most definitely block access to certain internet websites that can be deemed "harmful to minors". It is the most beneficial solution for everyone involved.</p>

<p>6/12</p>

<p>Your essay is formulaic; your argument is basic and underdeveloped. The first paragraph does very little except restate the question, and your writing is weak stylistically. Drop the fragments and rhetorical questions. Eliminate the word “things” from your vocabulary. Develop stronger and more original openings, work on better developing your argument, and craft a less formulaic summation for your final paragraph.</p>