<p>Hello CC members,
I'm totaly new in this forum and I'm very glad to see something like this. I need your help, I and hope that you will answer me. I hope that I will be a freshmen international student in the USA next year, and here is my first draft SAT essay I wrote after my preparation. Please, provide me with some advices and tell me what do you think about.</p>
<p>So, here is the topic:
Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and the assignment below. Peoples lives are the result of the choices they makeor fail to make. The path one takes in life is not arbitrary. Choices and their consequences determine the course of every persons life. All people, whatever their circumstances, make the choices on which their lives depend.</p>
<p>Assignment: Are peoples lives the result of the choices they make? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your
point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>
<p>here is my essay:
I hold a strong positive opinion on the statement that peoples's lives are, indeed, the result of the choices they make. These choices represent their personality and beliefs. The decisions people take reflect their will and what they are fighting for.
A peculiar example is Bethany Hamilton, a young American proffesional surfer, famous for surviving a shark attack, at the age of thirteen, that took her left arm and almost cost her life. In spite of the circumstances,she was determined to return to surfing, because that was the choice she has made. She could have changed her mind after the incident, but she stayed still, no matter. This choice was a crucial one in the girl's life and the future. We can almost say that it gave her the strenght she needed and in just a mouth, she managed to get on the board again and even won the first prize on an International surfying competition.
Another bright example for my previously stated thesis is Amelia Erhart, perhaps the most famous aviatrix in history. When she was young she made a choice- she decided to become one of the very first female pilots in history. This choice led her through the path of becoming one of the America's most prominent figures, who was a great inspiration for the society, especially for women. She saved money from various jobs she worked in order to pay her flying lessons. Eventually she succeeded in her goal and the choice she made was reflected in her life.
I admire these two American personality, not only because they inspired me to follow my dreams, but also because they are a clear-cut example that the choices we make reflect and result in our lives.
Thank you in advance to all of you who will spend time to answer me.</p>