Please please please

<p>Hi guys c: Could someone read my essay and provide come constructive criticism?
Prompt: Can success be disastrous? Plan & write an essay in which you develop your POV on this issue. Support your position with reasoning & examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>

<p>Essay:
Success is a point in life everyone tries to reach, regardless of background, race, gender, or social status. However, this positive virtue may end up with disastrous results, as exemplified in celebrity lives and literature, and even highlighted in our everyday lives.
Lindsay Lohan is the epitome of success turned into disaster. Starting out as a childhood superstar, Lindsay Lohan's career promised a bright future with her grand parts in classics such as The Parent Trap and Herbie Down Under. However, fame took over Lohan and led her down the path to destruction. She was arrested and charged for many DUI cases, and her name which had once been said with respect was now being used with scorn. People use “Lindsay Lohan” as an adjective to describe child superstars who have ended up taking the wrong path. Where Lindsay Lohan could have been prosperous, her life ended with disaster because of the early fame that came to her.
In In the Time of the Butterflies by Julia Alvarez, the four Mirabel sisters experience a sort of fame which leads to their downfall. The Mirabel sisters make it their immediate duty to overthrow their country's dictatorship of Rafael Trujillo, and sacrifice their life to make sure this happens. Through this pathway, their names were well-known and they served as the apotheosis of what the country looked to for hope. They became famous, and eventually, they were nearly successful before El Trujillo overpowered them and caused their death. In this case, their fame was not brought upon them for their own good, but provoked because they pursued what they believed to be right. Their fame led them to inevitable disaster.
Success turned into disaster is not only enjoyed by the higher societies, but can be exemplified in our everyday lives. My friend was a straight-A student, and she was commended by all of her teachers. She was, in short, a perfect student. All adults said that she had bright years ahead of her, and she was famous in our school. However, as the years progressed, she started taking her achievement for granted and slowly fell behind. Her success, ironically, led to her downfall.
Success is a great milestone in one's life, but not taken carefully could lead to great destruction. This is evident in history, literature, and life in general.</p>

<p>The essay has some questionable phrasing which muddies your points. Don’t use words you’re not obviously comfortable with - apotheosis being the obvious example. The essay flows more or less logically but the essay could be (should be?) written more concisely.</p>

<p>okaay thank you! bump?</p>