<p>At my school people just sleepover wherever their afterparty is. A prom I'm going to at an all-boys school is on a Thursday night and all jr and sr boys must go to school the next day, effectively ruling out wild afterparties because a few years ago things started getting crazy.</p>
<p>I'd say it depends on the kid.,. how well do you know your kid, as well as how well you know the date and the other people at the party. I mean, when I was 16 I slept over at friends (male friends) houses who were 21 years old... Those guys are now 28 years old and my 17 year old sister sleeps at their house too (with me of course). But my parents have known those guys since I was 12 years old and they completely trust them with us... and us with them. And nothing has ever happened at the sleepovers.</p>
<p>the whole week before my prom my economics teacher wrote his name and phone number (home and cell) on the board and asked everyone to write it down... stating that if anyone got drunk or in a bad situation they shouldn't hesitate to call, no questions asked, and he would go pick them up and give them a ride home. If i'm remembering right he had a few calls...</p>
<p>Someone I once knew told me that she'd heard a presentation recommending no sleepovers after junior high. The feeling was that that was when kids would try alcohol, or get into other mischief. So, I'd have to vote with the 2:00 am curfew. That's enough time to have something to eat after the prom, but I think everyone should sleep at their own homes. I can't imagine allowing a coed sleepover.</p>
<p>i think it just depends on the person.. although i think a lot of high schoolers and junior high kids are too irresponsible and immature... and sadly this continues into college for a lot of people.</p>
<p>i mean, my best friend is a guy, and i slept at his house as often during my last semester of college as i did at my own apartment.. and my boyfriend of almost six years didn't care at all... nor did my parents... because they all know me and trust me and such..</p>
<p>We hosted the after Homecoming party and served breakfast. We told all parents that we would remain up during the night. The guests left at 3:30 am. </p>
<p>We have been hosting teen and pre-teen parties for years (all non alcohol) and all the kids know that parents are allowed to walk in the bonus room at any time we choose (and we do)! We go in unannounced and bring in more refreshments. (Sometimes we take the doggie gate down and let the doggies run upstairs! The kids are so used to us that they often engage us in conversation and we end up being in the room most of the time. (There is no door to our rec room)</p>
<p>We always have kids begging to be able to come so we always have more then we think we're going to so we always buy extra food/drinks.</p>
<p>I always tell parents, if you want to keep these things in control -- HOST the parties -- yea, it costs a few dollars -- but these kids' safety is worth every dollar. Buy a good stereo, some of their fav CDs., rent/buy a choc fountain, rent/make a dance floor, rent/buy a karaoke machine, if you have a pool table (great!). whatever it takes to have clean honest memorable SAFE fun!</p>
<p>yeah, i posted something similar before.. peoples parents and neighbors used to come to our parties in college and it was just a great time had by all.</p>
<p><<< yeah, i posted something similar before.. peoples parents and neighbors used to come to our parties in college and it was just a great time had by all. >>></p>
<p>I think if you get kids "used to" having adults around at their parties then it truly is no big deal. Years ago, we started with pool parties and to insure that no one drowned or got tooo crazy in the water, I always told parents that they were welcome to sit with my H and I on the patio. The kids got so used to us "being there" that they began asking us to be the judges of their "best dives" "best belly-flops" whatever... We still have the annual pool party -- every Memorial Day weekend (rain or shine -- we really heat up the pool when it rains) and we all have a blast.</p>
<p>No one I knew had curfews - we all stayed up all night and crashed either at an afterprom party or our boyfriend's houses...lol.</p>
<p>jlauer, yeah.. i have these three friends who are brothers at school, and they live at home with their parents.. (i'm their pretend-daughter/sister.. cause their parents are always saying how they wish i was their daughter and the boys are always saying i'm like their sister) and all three guys went to different colleges in the area.. so whenever they would throw a party, each guy invited all of their friends from their school, and then the parents invited their friends as well.. so it would just be a big bash full of people aged 18-60. everyone would mix in with each other and we'd all have a great time. there were some freshman that came to one party and they were like huh.. why are there "adults" here.. and i was like what do you mean, we're all adults.. i bet you whine to your parents about wanting to be treated like an adult, but you can't go to a party that has adults at it? by the end of the night the kids were like "i never knew people my parents age could be this much fun"</p>
<p>it was just really funny :) we'd end up having the best parties around, invite only.. and we'd still have hundreds of people come from all different schools and such. it was really great to get to meet other people.. plus everything was byob so people weren't coming just to mooch off of other peoples alcohol, and with all the "adults" around it really kept the underage kids on their toes... and we'd usually start around 6pm and end around 4 am or so.. it was basically just a chance to hang out with everyone and "migle" with people from other schools. i've actually made a ton of friends from other schools that i wouldn't of known otherwise, and even got a job from one of the parents!</p>
<p><<< there were some freshman that came to one party and they were like huh.. why are there "adults" here.. and i was like what do you mean, we're all adults.. i bet you whine to your parents about wanting to be treated like an adult, but you can't go to a party that has adults at it? by the end of the night the kids were like "i never knew people my parents age could be this much fun" >>>.</p>
<p>Soooo true...... If they want to be treated as 'grown ups" then they shouldn't mind being around grown ups.</p>
<p>We do this for New Years Eve. We (the adults) invite our friends and the kids invite theirs. We all end up mingling and teaming up to play silly games or cards or staying up to watch movies or stand-up comedians..</p>
<p>yeah, it's pretty fun. sometimes we get pretty loud (most times we'll have a dj playing in one area of the house and bands in another area.. the three guys have a band so they have a huge band room and a lot of our friends have bands too so the bands take turns playing all night, it's just a great way to relax. ) and this one kid was like man.. this house is so loud, i can't believe the neighbors aren't calling the cops. then they realized all of the neighbors were at the party! it was so funny. </p>
<p>one time a car alarm started going off outside, and the cops came because they heard it from wherever they were. they came, realized a party was going on, knocked on the door, and my friends dad (whom is like 54) answered the door and asked what the problem was. the cop calmly stated that an alarm was going off, looked around the living room and saw nice mature things going on (people playing pool, playing chess, lots of people mingling) and then left. didn't say a thing about all the noise coming from the rest of the house or anything. I just thought it was funny the way he came and knocked and was all polite.. while the local frat's getting raided... and i bet there were a lot more people drinking at our party than at theirs (although i'm sure there were a lot more underaged kids at the frat completely "unsupervised" (like i said, everything was byob, and the people mixing drinks wouldn't serve you unless they knew you were 21).. it's just amazing how different it's treated when its a sensible thing with "adults" around and mature activities, not just people getting smashed for the heck of it.)</p>
<p>I'm going to a coed sleepover after prom. There will be no boyfriend-girlfriend couples, probably more girls than guys, all close friends. No one (parents) sees a need for the host parents to be up in the room with us all night, but that's based on our own situation. Six or eight close friends, none of whom have the slightest interest in drinking or having sex with each other.</p>
<p>Here, the normal prom weekend is getting a beach house or lot of motel rooms down the shore and getting drunk and having lots of sex. Parents often fund this, sign the housing contracts, supply the alcohol, buy condoms. In fact, my friends and I are the only group I know of that isn't going down the shore.</p>
<p>"Here, the normal prom weekend is getting a beach house or lot of motel rooms down the shore and getting drunk and having lots of sex. Parents often fund this, sign the housing contracts, supply the alcohol, buy condoms. In fact, my friends and I are the only group I know of that isn't going down the shore."</p>
<p>Wow! Parents buying the condoms and supplying the alchol to underage teenage drinkers. Please tell me you're kidding. If you're not you're parents should be arrested!</p>
<p>Do other parents have a problem with the whole coed sleepover idea? I know I'm out of date, but I remember when I wasn't allowed to have male friends in my room, even to study. The idea of having male friends spend the night would have struck my parents as extremely improper. I don't get why parents would allow this. I know people will claim that "nothing happens" but I have a hard time believing that. And how do people explain all the teen pregnancies and/or STDs? I think it's hard enough to get kids through adolescence without facilitating early sexuality.</p>
<br>
<blockquote> <blockquote> <blockquote> <p>I'm going to a coed sleepover after prom. ..... Six or eight close friends, none of whom have the slightest interest in drinking or having sex with each other. <<<<</p> </blockquote> </blockquote> </blockquote>
<br>
<p>Famous last words.... One of my very best friends would want me to comment on this!!!! Her son took "just a good friend" to the prom a couple of years ago. They had "no romantic" interest in each other at all -- they had just been "pals" during HS. Prom night comes - the evening was very romantic -- she looked pretty and he looked handsome -- they danced all night and, oops , they end up having sex. Of course no protection is used because neither anticipated sex remotely happening that night. Now my good friend is the grandma of a little boy. Both of these kids are angry with themselves for letting "the moment" of prom get away from them which resulted in this baby. Although they ALL love the little boy, these parents are not a couple and only see each other when they switch off custody of the child.</p>
<p>"Wow! Parents buying the condoms and supplying the alchol to underage teenage drinkers. Please tell me you're kidding. If you're not you're parents should be arrested!"
No, it's really bad. My parents made it clear that they would absolutely not be doing this but they're fine with a coed sleepover at a good friend's home. The number of parents who do approve the traditional prom weekend at the shore is shocking.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Do other parents have a problem with the whole coed sleepover idea?
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Yeah, I do. Thinking about my daughter, and her friends - I am almost positive nothing would happen - absolutely no alcohol, good friends, not bf/gf couples except for 1 - but, for me, it just isn't the right message to send them. Now certainly you can argue that she went off to a continuous coed sleepover just a few months later at her coed dorm, still age 17, but somehow that is different, and condoning or even promoting casual sleepovers, even for an occasion as momentous as prom, takes away some of the specialness of the step of maturation that is going off to college. Just call me old-fashioned, but not in high school, not in my house, and not with kids of widely varying ages, ie a few 14 and 15 year olds thrown in.</p>
<p>That's what makes us great - differences in opinion and outlook.</p>
<p>I would not allow a coed sleepover. There are some boundaries that need to be respected.</p>
<p>I would allow a coed sleepover- but for anyone younger than a senior after prom I would have a one or perhaps two hr curfew for after it ended.
Senior year- I spent the evening at the home of the boy she went to the prom with- they were having a small "adult" dinner party, the prom goers went and did something directly afterwards, but I believe we were all home by 2.</p>
<p>For graduation- ( small class of 18) the class took a cruise directly afterward that lasted all night. About 3 am they were dropped off at docks below one of the classmates homes, where they went to sleep till 10 or 11 when the parents of the class made them breakfast.
Many of these kids had gone to school together since 6th grade, and we were very comfortable with their behavior and with the other parents.</p>
<p>I worry about the 2AM part....in my town the bars close at 2am, so at that time, it is the most dangerous time to be on the road, people leaving bars, clubs, etc.</p>
<p>I told my D to NOT be on the road with friends at that time, either 1:30 or 2:30, because 2AM to 2:30AM is PRIME time for drunks to be on the road</p>
<p>My Ds were at a house and D called me to say they would leave about 230, I said to wait until 245 when most people leaving bars should be off the roads</p>
<p>i am very serious about this</p>
<p>(I am not sure STATISTICALLY) about my thoughts, but I do KNOW that bars close at 2am, and a there would be a number of people driving at that time that shouldn't be, that are drunk, and not as staggered on the road, and if they are leaving at that hour, most likely they have been partying)</p>