Pushing my son for elite school

The one Stanford grad I know earned his PhD there, and dissuaded S from applying as an undergrad for similar reasons to those listed above. He earned his undergrad at a much smaller LAC and only recommends Stanford for grad programs.

Question to those who might know…if the OP’s son received $30,000 a year in need based aid from Stanford…will this amount of need based aid get reduced if he accepts an outside scholarship? And if so…how?

I don’t see why anyone would think there is an issue to apply by the USC scholarship deadline even if applying to Stanford SCEA. SCEA schools have no restrictions on RD applications. The USC deadline does not require anything but an RD app by Dec. 1. It is just an issue of timing.

Stanford first replaces the student work expectation, then replaces grants, when outside scholarship money is received. There is even a handy table of examples: http://financialaid.stanford.edu/aid/outside/

Ok…so to,the OP…were you hoping to ADD that outside scholarship money to the Stanford award your son has already received? If so, that does not sound likely.

Here is how USC describes its admissions policies for 2016:

USC does not offer early decision or early action admission programs. All students who apply to the university by the appropriate deadline are given equal consideration in the application review process. Please visit the First-Year Dates and Deadlines page or the Transfer Dates and Deadlines page for more information.

All first-year applicants who submit a complete application by the December 1 deadline will be considered for USC Merit Scholarships and will receive notification of their status in February. Applicants who are not selected to receive or interview for scholarships will still be considered for regular admission. All first-year applicants who submit a complete application by the January deadline will be mailed an admission decision by April 1. USC does not have an Early Decision or Early Action program. Only notification from the Office of Admission constitutes an offer of admission.

And this recent article describes the scholarships:
http://dailytrojan.com/2015/01/25/admissions-announces-scholarship-finalists/

I just returned from Stanford Parent Weekend. I am going to provide a different perspective than the majority of those responding. Grad vs. undergrad–the opinions here are a crock. My son is taught by professors, not TA’s, not grad students, etc. The professors are truly engaged with the undergrads and have ample office hours for the kids. Many of them are also undergrad advisors once the student declares a major. The TA’s that assist the professor are also available for assistance at nearly any time. My son often gets immediate responses to emails sent at all hours of the night. If you can’t find help in a class at Stanford now, you are not looking. My son has attended the same types of classes with his friends at various respected state schools when he has visited them. He commented to me just how poorly he thought they were taught–no professor, TA with poor English skills, no engagement, etc. Stanford is a special place, in a unique part of the country that is not replicated anywhere else on earth. There is only one Silicon Valley.The opportunities arising out of that Stanford/Silicon Valley symbiosis can’t be duplicated. Having said all that, I would agree with those who said to lay out all the options, list the classes, professors, opportunities and such for each option and decide. I am doing the same with my other child. I won’t hold back my bias for Stanford though. I am paying. I know more about the world than a 17 year old. I am allowed to voice a strong opinion. You have Stanford at 1/2 off. That’s almost too good to pass up.

ClarinetDad16 you missed this:
" Last Friday, the Office of Undergraduate Admissions released the decisions to the 1,200 finalists."

Those 1200 students have been already been accepted. They received big red packages from the Admissions office.
Some were also invited to interview for scholarships .Some were not invited and will be probably be receiving the Deans scholarship.

here is a link to the USC early acceptance thread
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-southern-california/1854621-fall-2016-class-of-2020-usc-decisions-stats-only-thread.html#lates

here is a link to some posts by students who were accepted early-

" 01-23-2016 at 11:32 am
I just got my acceptance letter! I live in Los Angeles so it came pretty quickly. It didn’t have any information about scholarships though, just acceptance."

http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-southern-california/1842387-usc-class-of-2020-results-discussion-thread-p20.html

Not sure how it might affect OP’s financial award specifically from Stanford, but at many schools, outside merit awards REDUCE a family’s need and therefore, reduces its financial aid award. If Stanford assessed OP’s contribution at around $30,000, that may not change if OP’s kid gets outside merit award. When a student receives outside merit awards, some schools will first reduce the loan and work study portion of a financial aid award and not touch grant money. Others may not. The OP should take a careful look at Stanford’s financial aid policies.

Merit awards help full pay families (like mine) because the family is paying it all, so merit money reduces the amount which the family has to come up with. However, for families receiving financial aid, merit aid reduces what the college gives you, not what you have to pay.

Parent1337
The opinions her are not crock.
They are just different from yours.
Try to be a little more civil. 8-| [-X

Just want to note that all those issues aren’t limited to public colleges as undergrads at various private colleges…including HYPSM elites have voiced the same complaints in person IRL and on their respective college’s internal guides rating Profs and courses.

Also, from having actually met and known some of the Profs accused of having “poor English skills” or “strong foreign accents” by undergrads at some of the elite private colleges, the accusations are often just as likely to be little more than an attempt to use xenophobic rationalizations to excuse their own mediocre or less than desired grades which were really a product of them having misplaced priorities(emphasizing beer/party/social activities over academics) and lack of initiative in doing things like being proactive in class discussions or going to Prof/TA office hours.

Especially considering some of those Profs are actually native-born American no different from undergrads making those accusations. Only difference was those Profs’ apparent ethnicity tends to be regarded as “foreign looking” by many in US society. Especially those who regard themselves as “real murikans”.

In some fields, good American graduate students are in short supply. They are snapped up by top graduate schools. I do think that many state schools are likely to have higher percentages of foreign graduate TAs.

Still don’t know “Why Stanford?” from either the parent or the kid. And what major?

I think it might make a difference if OP said, eg, Well I had a rigorous college experience and blah, blah. Versus, I wasn’t satisfied with my education, the lack of prestige, rigor or whatever, so he needs to do this. Or, Well, I love the team or the architecture or I knew a guy who majored in X there and he was smart and wealthy.

Btw, lots of folks believe the grad education at UCLA and UCB is superior to undergrad.

And another random reference point – we know a faculty member who gave a series of lectures at Stanford, and was bowled over by the beauty of the campus. He did comment that, coming from the Humanities, he perceived that there was a powerful entrepreneurial feel to everything, that undergrads were very focused on connection between their undergrad work and business. That might be powerful aphrodisiac to some, a total turn off to others.

That entrepreneurial spirit is also a steep incline for even the hardiest, most inventive thinkers.

@nosycaliparent “In regards to other questions raised we plan to visit the Stanford campus in the next few weeks, he wants to study economics and we live in the LA area. We did attend a Stanford dinner with some other EA’s and he did find the kids there a little nerdy(his words). He also has a girlfriend that will attend Pepperdine but I’m sure that is another forum question in itself. In conclusion I know I don’t have all the answers. I lost my father when I was four so I don’t have a reference. I do agree with your general consensus and will let him(as I have always planned) make his own decision and I will love and support him. I’ll work on the overbearing part. It’s sometimes hard being a parent. Thank you for your comments…”

Congratulations on you son’s admission to Stanford. It is a big achievement.

We worked through some similar issues.

One thing that helped me and her, was to understand what issues were important to her in choosing a school. I discussed with her some potential concerns that I had. I then developed specific comparisons of details related to those issues. When we visited colleges, we would both make observations and ask questions to help us make comparisons. I organized a matrix of issues and responses.

Issues important to her were finding a school with a high level of challenge, sociable students, strong social opportunities, research opportunities, internship opportunities, active clubs that interest her, proximity to a major city, and an average homework load that is not more than about 40 hours per week, access to a decent swimming pool, and career opportunities at graduation. Obviously, these items will vary for each student.

As we took college visits and attended admitted student days, we continued to develop the assessment. it was always her decision, but I was able to support her and we worked together to find the right fit for her. This process really helped her think through her decision, and helped me understand the reasons behind what she was thinking. For example, she thought that many of the MIT students were a bit socially awkward, and was concerned that the level of homework would be way beyond the 40 hours per week she thought was reasonable. As a parent, you may be thinking that MIT or Stanford would be the chance of 10 lifetimes, but for a student to be successful at that level, they have to want it. Even the best students will be put under stress and have bad weeks and months. When that happens, it will not go well if the student is calling home blaming you for getting them into this mess. They have to own it.

I hope that some of that is helpful to you.

Stanford is more clear than other schools about what it does:
http://financialaid.stanford.edu/aid/outside/

@ucbalumnus Interesting – so, outside awards reduce expected student contribution and so save the student from having to work during school year or summer. But awards exceeding the student contribution will not change the parent contribution.

It was a big eye opener for us when we realized that outside funding didn’t change our expected parental contribution. We had always imagined it as “our money” to reduce our out of pocket, but that is not how the schools we talke to view it.

The OP here. @lookingforward to answer your question “Why Stanford?” I attended the University of North Carolina and UCLA grad school and I enjoyed my college experience. My wife attended USC so we each have a connection. My son is stronger academically than I ever was so my line of thinking was to give him the best opportunity possible. We (TBH mostly me) researched roughly 20 colleges some which he approved like Stanford, USC, UCB, UCLA and Pepperdine(he liked this one because his girlfriend will be attending) and some he rejected Michigan, Yale, Harvard, Princeton. Michigan was too cold for him. We had a discussion about HPY and he felt that being a West Coast kid and surfing every weekend plus the only wardrobe he owns are shorts and tank tops, that it might be a tough fit for him.
I do have a good friend that went to Stanford and he shared that the relationships and contacts that he built there helped him to be very successful. I know those same contacts are at other schools as well but I love the programs offered at Stanford. He wants to major in Economics and/or Psychology. He also has a good friend there from his high school volleyball team which is a plus for Stanford. My son has decided that we will attend Family weekend on April 28th at Stanford. We will visit UCB in late March during his spring break. He has already visited UCS and UCLA and Pepperdine. He will make his decision by May 1st. I’m rooting for Stanford!!!

Pepperdine is a strongly religious school (Churches of Christ). Is that something he prefers (since it is so different from the rest of the list)?