<p>Having problems with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Just remember -- every couple has its moment!</p>
<p>What did Heisenberg say about sex?
"If you've got the position you haven't got the momentum, and if you've got the energy you haven't got the time!"</p>
<p>“Why don’t you have your physics homework?”
“I calculated its velocity so precisely that according to Heisenberg, it could be anywhere in the universe.”</p>
<p>nothing beats my joke.</p>
<p>
[quote]
e^x and a constant function are walking down the street. Suddenly, the constant function turns and runs in the opposite direction. e^x asks: "Why the hurry?"
The constant function stops, catches his breath, and yells "There's a differential operator headed this way! If he finds me, he'll differentiate me and nothing will be left of me!"
e^x laughs and replies "Oh, he won't hurt ME, I'M e to the x!"
So he keeps walking and sure enough, he meets the differential operator.
e^x: Hey, I'm e^x.
differential operator: Hey, I'm d/dy.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>I get it but it's not really funny because there's no punchline.</p>
<p>"So he keeps walking and sure enough, he meets the differential operator.
e^x: Hey, I'm e^x.
differential operator: Hey, I'm d/dy."</p>
<p>is all superfluous.</p>
<p>^^That part's the punchline. The point is e^x thought he was invincible, but the d/dy can make him into a constant anyway.</p>
<p>What do you call a bunch of losers?</p>
<p>The people posting in this thread.</p>
<p>:)</p>
<p>ROFL, I don't even understand half the stuff you kids these days are posting...dunno about you guys but I got a good deal of HW</p>
<p>
[quote]
Here are two of my favourites:
e^x and a constant function are walking down the street. Suddenly, the constant function turns and runs in the opposite direction. e^x asks: "Why the hurry?"
The constant function stops, catches his breath, and yells "There's a differential operator headed this way! If he finds me, he'll differentiate me and nothing will be left of me!"
e^x laughs and replies "Oh, he won't hurt ME, I'M e to the x!"
So he keeps walking and sure enough, he meets the differential operator.
e^x: Hey, I'm e^x.
differential operator: Hey, I'm d/dy.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>I like :)
10char</p>
<p>fizix... you are officially awesome, just so you know...</p>
<p>how does the man on the moon cut his hair?</p>
<p>eclipse it!</p>
<p>haha yeah. dont shoot me. i laughed.</p>
<p>Why couldn't helen keller get a drivers license?</p>
<p>cuz shes a woman</p>
<p>what's an engineers best contraception?</p>
<p>his personality</p>
<p>Did you hear about the kidnapping?</p>
<p>-he woke up-</p>
<p>a teacher calls a student and asks him to solve:</p>
<p>3456
x2904</p>
<p>so he says: "Aren't there enough problems in the world?"</p>
<p>that one wasn't that good...I'm a little short on jokes right now.</p>
<p>The man climbs the mountain and finds the sage. He says, "Wise sage, I have come all this way to ask the eternal question: Why?"</p>
<p>The sage ponders for several minutes and consults his Official SAT Study Guide. He replies, "Because!"</p>
<p>The man stands puzzled, then turns to go when the sage resumes. "That'll be $41.50 please ... an extra $50 for divine verification ..."</p>
<p>^ lol .</p>