Read my essay? (Common App)

<p>Hi!
I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do for the common app essay. I'm going to try writing a few essays for the different topics and seeing which one is the best. Currently, I finished writing my essay for the question "Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?" The essay is much too long, so I'm hoping someone will help me find parts to trim, and also give feedback as to if the essay is working. </p>

<p>Post if you are interested. Thanks. :)</p>

<p>I’ll check it out!</p>

<p>I’ll help!</p>

<p>I’d be happy to do it</p>