<p>My D is a prez scholar and will begin college next fall. She has a best friend who is a sweet girl whom we like very much. She shares the same moral principles as my D, they are teammates on the swim team, she attends church every Sunday. Sounds good right? Well the problem is this young lady is not studious at all. She is bright but has always taken courses below her ability so she could complete her homework and studying during study hall. She is forever texting my D to go out and socialize. Up until recently, this hasn’t been a big problem. But lately, her influence is negatively effecting my D.</p>
<p>So, not a big deal since the girls will be going to different colleges…not so fast. My D announces last night, guess where best friend just applied! We don’t freak out because there is no chance this girl can get into the honors college. Then my D says, I think I can get best friend into honors dorms if I want…OMG! Is this true?</p>
<p>If so, we are contemplating NOT sending our housing deposit in early and just taking our chance with housing. Any thoughts??</p>
<p>What if your D <em>wants</em> to room w/ this friend…or decides she wants non-honors dorm instead so they can be together? (How much influence does friend have over D?) Have the inevitable conversation now, is my advice. We went through this at one point, only it involved S + girlfriend. Fortunately they ended up at different schools, but I was a bit worried when kids first were applying.</p>
<p>I would advise that they don’t room together no matter what. HS school friends often go their separate ways once in college, and sometimes one gets upset.</p>
<p>It’s perplexing. Only about a month ago my D was telling how she was looking forward to leaving HS behind and starting a brand new chapter in her life at college. She has always wanted to go somewhere no other kids from her HS were going. This in now way reflects her HS experience. she has had a tremendous time in HS and has enjoyed her friends, teammates, teachers and classes. She just loves new experiences and adventures. So we don’t know how this whole thing is going to shake out. Now I find myself routing for another school! Bama is the only school that this girl and my D are both applying to. </p>
<p>Are there any sororities that target HC girls? If so, maybe that will separate them?</p>
<p>Your last post says it all and how you need to approach the issue. Exactly what my D told her best friend if that friend had applied to UA. D told her that they would not be roommates, period. I’d just sit down and have an nice friendly heart to heart with D and tell her that her and the bff need to have different roommates in order to meet others. </p>
<p>If they both rush it is highly unlikely they would end up in the same sorority. May be one way to break away even if they were in the same honors dorm room. </p>
<p>At least in the honors dorm rooms they have their own bedroom. Still, that influence is pretty close.</p>
<p>My D is going to college (not UA) with her best friend from high school. Although we love the best friend, we told her that she should not live with best friend. They would have a better chance of remaining friends if they didn’t live together and they would have 2x as many friends right away on campus if they lived apart. So far, it’s working out great. Put your foot down if you have to. Even the advisors at orientation suggested that friends do not room together.</p>
<p>It sounds like all you need to do right now is to speak with your daughter about the situation and advise her that living with a friend is not a good idea, especially if there are already issues. Having roommates can be tough enough. Friends often expect rooming together to be like one never ending sleepover. It often isn’t, at least not a pleasant one. </p>
<p>I think it would be silly though to allow someone else’s choices of where to apply or attend influence your daughter’s choice of schools. No matter where she enrolls, there will always be someone who could be a negative influence IF she allows it. Speak with your daughter, and then let her show you she can be trusted to make excellent choices. This sounds like a minor glitch that could be easily avoided.</p>
<p>Coming from a boy’s mom- we are from Alabama and my S is a freshman- he chose to live with a boy from his HS - friends but not great friends and 2 boys from ATL- they had never met until BB and now all seem quite happy- several of his best buddies are all living together but I am glad he has the opportunity to live with someone new and make new friends thru connections…</p>