<p>Weird. What happens when 10 people stop in to chat or pregame? Do you yell- Don’t sit on my bed!! I am a weirdo!</p>
<p>I, too, wish someone would explain the issue with sitting on the bed. I don’t get it. In dorm rooms, it seems that the beds are basically sofas when not in use. But then again, I’m not a germaphobe at all. (What “germs” are going to get on the bed that aren’t getting to the rest of the room?)</p>
<p>I have to admit I would not like someone sitting on my bed. But I would get a large spread or quilt to put on the bed when people were over, so that they had something to sit on, and just deal with that. If I did not want people on my bed, I would certianly work with my RM to figure out other locations they could sit.</p>
<p>I sort of understand the bed issue. For someone who has never had to share a room, the bed becomes their haven, the only thing that is theirs alone. But in a tiny dorm room, one would hope common sense would prevail.</p>
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<p>I agree with this – a point that Hunt made as well, I think – 100%. Why can’t the OP’s D simply ignore the roomie’s demands about not having guests over when she is not there? The demand is ridiculous, and the roomie has already violated her own rule (both about the no guests when the other roommate is not there and about no sitting on the other roommate’s bed) when the OP’s D was out of the room. </p>
<p>I don’t see the need for the OP’s D to talk to the RA about it, or even to speak up to the roomie. The OP’s D should just do what she considers reasonable, and if the roomie has a problem, the burden should be on her to complain to the RA!</p>
<p>I realize this doesn’t help with the cleaning the bathroom issue as much. My S1 has that problem, and he just cleans it himself, but not that often. Not a perfect solution, but he’s used to it by now (junior year).</p>
<p>To me, the bed is just the definition of personal space. I am only joking a little bit when I say that someone I don’t know being on my bed would be like asking to borrow my underwear. And I shared a bedroom almost my entire life! I don’t get saying that for people who have never shared a room the bed was all they had-- they had THE ROOM! If my sister wanted to sit on my bed, I’d not be thrilled but it wouldn’t be a big deal. My roommate’s friends would have been a HUUUUUGE no no. If you can’t claim your own BED as your space, I don’t know what else you can. If you want to let your guests sit on your bed that’s okay, but you are not at liberty to offer up roomie’s unless they say it’s okay. That’s just the way it is these days. Some people don’t care but it’s not appropriate to assume it’s okay.</p>
<p>@Emaheevul07, I meant that for a person who has never shared a room before, the bed in the new shared dorm room is the only thing they have that is theirs alone.</p>
<p>I don’t understand the bed issue either, but it’s ok for a person with an “issue” to insist that no one sit on her bed. </p>
<p>The “no visitors when I’m not here” rule is not acceptable. I think that in the future, whenever this princess has a ridiculous demand, she should be told that she needs to get approval from the RA that the demand is reasonable and normal before she insists.</p>