Second semester freshman-is the honeymoon over?

<p>Experienced parents:
My d has been blissful during her first semester, but now a health dose of reality has set in. She is stressed over upcoming exams, and spent Christmas vacation with piles of books. Her long term boyfriend broke up with her and invited his new college girlfriend to town for a week. Her favorite friend and team mate has quit the team. Yikes!</p>

<pre><code> I assume it is normal for even the happiest kids to experience a drop as the blush of the first semester wears off. What is my job now? Is this part of the normal up and down? She is an 8 hour drive away, and I have younger kids at home, so she is really going to have to fend for herself.
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<p>Chances are very good that she will handle these tough times and come through them more mature than before. This is what they call "life," and we can't live it for them.</p>

<p>Once her exams are behind her, she'll feel more relaxed. Assuming she does reasonably well, she'll also feel more confident.</p>

<p>I think your "job" at this point is to express confidence in her abilities to weather the tough times. Then, when all this is behind her, remind her that you knew she could handle it.</p>

<p>Actually, the second semester is usually easier. Returning to a familiar place and at least a few familiar people is almost always easier than starting out in a new environment.</p>

<p>Second semester freshmen have usually adjusted to college, at least somewhat, and are more comfortable there. Of course, new issues can arise occasionally -- for example, for one of my kids, second semester freshman year was the first time when she had to cope with being sick while at college. </p>

<p>One issue that is virtually certain to arise during the second half of freshman year is finding housing for the following year. This is often a source of considerable angst and confusion, especially for those who have poor luck in an on-campus housing lottery.</p>

<p>First semester is a lot like summer camp. Reality does start to set in after a while.</p>

<p>It's probably going to be easier for her to be back at school over the boyfriend situation. She'll have a better network of friends to help her over it. Also, out of sight out of mind.</p>

<p>My daughter went through a breakup and a case of mono second semester. There were a lot of phone calls, but she had a lot of support from her friends at school. It was harder for me knowing she didn't need me as much as she used to.</p>

<p>All you could is to listen. Often my daughter would be very upset on the phone, she would be over it quickly and I would worry until I hear from her again. I am better at letting it wash over me now.</p>

<p>Thanks to all of you. We just got back from the train station and I am suffering from a relapse of separation blues. Listening and reassuring her that she is up to the task is a good idea.</p>