<p>One parent I know is thrilled that, after a week, her freshman daughter loves college, yet she still worries that it's only the "honeymoon period." Another wonders if his daughter's misery is due to a poor college choice or just homesickness and adjustment issues.</p>
<p>What do veteran college students and their parents advise? Are the first few weeks often accurate indicators of what to expect or are they apt to be red herrings that don't necessarily reflect the real deal to come?</p>
<p>In general, the honeymoon never ended for D last year, which made the transition of her being gone a lot easier for me.</p>
<p>However, when a "crisis" did come up, I tried not to get too worked up about it.... usually a day or two later, she'd nearly forgotten about it, and things had worked themselves out just fine. (part of the "bring your drama to mama" thing).</p>
<p>My second daughter just left for college 2 weeks ago. I believe I am just starting to hear the comfort level and happiness increase in her voice. All kids are different. My oldest daughter went to college and never looked back. My second daughter needed an adjustment period.</p>
<p>They are all very different with different expectations and reasons to go to college and why they choose specific one. I was very worrying about my extremely sheltered D who was the only child in a house since birth and went to very small private schools all the way thru HS. I never asked her to do any chores in a house including her own room or laundry. She has been fine after freshman year. While it is no indication that it will continue the same way (I hope that it will), I can say if she could adjust, than anybody could. She was happy from day #1 ...and loved doing her laundry, not that she continued doing it at home in a summer. We are happy as long as she is.</p>
<p>My D is having just the opposite experience as whatsnext?'s D.....started great but now 2 weeks in and is homesick. Hopefully this too shall pass~</p>
<p>For my d, the bigger transition was going back after semester break. First semester, everything's shiny & new, and there are lots of people to meet and lots of things to get used to. Starting off second semester, it's winter, you're already familiar with the school, your roommates and your friends, and there's more of a "so this is it for the next four years?" feeling. </p>
<p>But that too passed as she got back into the swing of things.</p>
<p>I'm not sure the first weeks predict what's ahead. It depends on the student, the major, the college and a bunch of other factors.</p>
<p>Both my kids had very difficult first semesters. D's was because of a roommate and a very tough academic schedule. But she solved them both herself - dealt with RA and then housing who was able to find her another room (yes, roommate issue was that serious). As for her academics, she decided the major she had selected was going to be far too difficult for her, so she changed majors. She loved her school and was very happy to be there and just had to iron out her problems.</p>
<p>S's problems were a college that turned out not to be a good fit for him and his gf of 2 1/2 years breaking up with him 2 weeks into the semester. He decided he needed to transfer, got that going and transferred for the spring semester. The gf issue was a lot tougher to deal with. But he has started the new year at his transfer school and is very happy with everything.</p>
<p>I don't know about the honeymoon period, but parents should be aware of the sophomore slump--not only in baseball, but also in college.</p>
<p>Yup. 3.6 to 2.5 in the pre grade inflation college days.</p>
<p>Sometimes the honeymoon ends after the first round of exams. A good smack of reality when they realize they aren't in high school anymore, they really need to do all the reading, they haven't figured out yet how to get out a 10 page paper overnight and one must actually study for chem and calc exams.</p>
<p>I think this link provides an interesting insight into the potential stages of freshman year. "Rhythms of the year"<br>
Thurgood</a> Marshall College: UC San Diego's Third College</p>
<p>My daughter's second semester seemed less happy than the 1st. Not miserable but not as happy. In fact I started a thread about it - second semester blues or something like that - and found it was not uncommon. There was other stuff going on - a break up with her b\f of 2 years - awkwardness as he not only goes to the same school but was in the same dorm in the room next to hers :eek:. Her grades dropped a tad - nothing disasterous - 2 Bs instead of straight As the 1st semester. She did feel she had dropped the ball a little gradewise as she got the As 1st semester without too much difficulty and slacked off a little second semester then had to scrabble to pull herself up.</p>
<p>she was ready for the year to end. We early on absolutely discouraged any thoughts of summer classes and she ended up having a summer working experience that was very hard work but meaningful for her. Came back ready for sophomore year. Is in an apartment which she much prefers to dorm living. So far she seems happy. Fingers crossed.</p>
<p>Honeymoon is still going strong academic wise for D1...grades have increased steadily going in to junior year. Can see her losing some interest athletically as she readies for the outside world and sees how playing a sport decreases some of her chances for internships she wants. Socially the comfort waxes and wanes depending on the men in her life. sigh.....</p>
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Socially the comfort waxes and wanes depending on the men in her life. sigh.....
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Sounds like my daughter. But right now she has a new love in her life - a kitten. The kitten sleeps with her and is a snuggler - my daughter said she woke up to find herself gazing into the kitten's eyes and decided "I'm in love - who needs a boyfriend". Hoping that lasts a year or three.</p>
<p>Both of my kids (luckily) loved their schools right from the start...and that didn't change. DS graduated from undergrad with the same sense of zeal he felt the first day he arrived.</p>
<p>aw! A kitty! My dd would be so jealous! Swimcat must be living off campus to be allowed a cat, I'm thinking. How nice for her!</p>
<p>My DD had an exciting first year and then fell into the sophomore slump. She then went up and down after that, depending mostly on the social situations at the time. Now that she has graduated, she looks back wistfully at her undergrad years and wonders what she ever complained about. </p>
<p>Junior son is even Steven. All is well, all the time. No drama. No downs, no ups. It's all cool.</p>
<p>About a week into our daughter's freshman year, her IM said, "I love college life!" and within a few days it said, "I want to come home."</p>
<p>The first year was hard: very challenging roommate situation; two short (and not very good) relationships with guys; and a tough work load. But she gutted it out, made dean's list, and was happy to go back the next fall. Now a senior, she'd say that things have gotten better every year. </p>
<p>And although she's happy at her college, she still gets homesick and counts down the days till she comes home each break. Can't complain about that!</p>
<p>Both kids were very happy at their school right from the beginning. I think the freshman weeklong orientation which is held just before school starts, where very, very strong mentor relationships are formed (groups of about 8 freshman matched with two upperclassmen) help the new kids really feel at home and welcomed and prepared for school.</p>
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Swimcat must be living off campus to be allowed a cat, I'm thinking. How nice for her!
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Yes she is. She and a friend got an off campus apartment. They were lucky enough to find one right next to campus (or she would have stayed in the dorms - was not willing to have to drive to school). She is actually closer to her classes than her dorm was last year. She loves having her own space. Was waiting for hours today for the cable guy to show up to hook up the internet . She texted me really irate about it. I texted back - 'welcome to the world of having your own home. This won't be the last time this happens to you ;) ' .</p>
<p>She was unamused. :D</p>
<p>The tough part for dd1 was January Freshman year. The newness had worn off, the weather was cold and gray and she looked at the calendar and counted the weeks until spring break. All was solved with a weekend visit from the whole family, including the dog.</p>
<p>Now, as a senior, she is in a panic that she still has too many classes she wants to take and not enough months left to take them all.</p>