Should my freshman daughter transfer to to a cheaper school?

<p>My daughter is attending KU as a freshman. She received their highest academic scholarship which at the time we thought was GREAT news. BUT it is a lot of pressure. She is a good student and is also in their honors program. She gets all A's and B's... but the scholarship requires she keeps a 3.5 GPA. Her advisor at the college warned her that if she has a 3.4 they will kick the scholarship from her. (The honors program only requires her to keep a 3.2 GPA which is not too stressful for her.)</p>

<p>She applied to K State as well and they even offered her in state tuition. (She graduated from 4 years at a Kansas high school but we actually live 7 miles across a neighboring border.) At this point she is wondering if she should transfer to K State or some other college to cut down on the financial stress and also the academic pressure. She thought KU would be the school for her BUT it is very institutional and not at all welcoming. I'm disappointed at this point. I suppose I am too naive, but I really would like the thought that her college actually valued her and wanted her comfortable and happy. I'm pretty sure KU doesn't actually care at all.</p>

<p>PLEASE... if anyone has any good advice or comments on this subject I would REALLY appreciate some input. Am I expecting too much? Should I advise her to transfer? THANK YOU.</p>

<p>Honestly… big universities typically are not very caring places. Not sure K State would be better in that respect. If she can keep the 3.5, there is something to be said for the scholarship and having a high GPA anyway when she graduates. If I were you I would be looking carefully at her mental health. If she is coping pretty well in the regard, has friends, and thinks she can keep the 3.5, then she should stay.</p>

<p>I assume it is too late for transfer applications for this fall anyway. I would encourage her to stick it out this year and fill out transfer applications next year if she is still unhappy and/or can’t keep her grades up enough to keep the scholarship.</p>

<p>College was never meant to be a warm and fuzzy place. It’s the final practice before the work place, which will make college feel like Disneyland. Unless it’s making your daughter ill, she needs to stick it out. It will maker her stronger and better prepared for the future. The experience will also be an immense source of pride when she succeeds.</p>

<p>They wouldn’t have awarded her the scholarship if they didn’t think she was highly capable of doing the work. State universities are usually not warm and fuzzy places, though the folks in the honors program should help.</p>

<p>To be clear, private colleges and universities are not necessarily warm and fuzzy places, either. Some may do a little more hand-holding, but at the end of the day it’s still the student’s responsibility to perform. Lots of schools that give merit scholarships, public and private, have pretty demanding requirements for keeping those scholarships. And if it’s not a merit scholarship that stresses students out, it’s often something else–maintaining a GPA that will make them competitive for law, medical, or business school, or for some prized award or fellowship, or for that elusive job in an environment where top entry-level jobs are still pretty scarce.</p>

<p>My advice would be to stick it out, turn that stress into positive motivation to succeed, and succeed.</p>

<p>I disagree with the above posters. It sounds like your daughter is unhappy, which is not a good recipe for a high GPA.</p>

<p>The fact that the school is unwelcoming is not the issue; the fact that the scholarship feels in jeopardy is.</p>

<p>It may be that funds are short and the school makes it difficult to keep the GPA for the scholarship. I work in a state university system and I understand how institutional mind sometimes works.</p>

<p>If there is no financial loss, and your daughter thinks she would like a less stressful situation, I think transferring is a good option.</p>

<p>There are places where a 3.5 is doable, and there are places where a 3.5 can only be doable some semesters. I don’t know which category KU is in.</p>

<p>Could you afford the school without the scholarship? If the answer is yes, then there is no real down side to transferring. If the answer is no, then it is a sensible option.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>Don’t assume this is still on the table. Seldom are offers for new students re-awarded to a transfer.</p>

<p>I agree with collegeshopping. I doubt the K state offer is still available for a transfer.</p>

<p>Are you out of state for Kansas? Can I ask what state you live in? I don’t want to be prying, but members here might suggest in state options.</p>

<p>What is the deadline for looking into transfer options? Have they passed? Also, agree that the FA offered to an incoming freshman is not typically the same as to a trasfer student. IF finances are a concern, check that out first.</p>

<p>Has she considered seeing a counselor to help with school adjustment?</p>

<p>That “cheaper” alternative might not be cheaper for a transfer student. I would encourage her to look at her options, but to understand that they may cost more.</p>

<p>She is on a merit scholarship and in the honors program - does the scholarship require her to participate in the honors program? If not, would eliminating the honors classes make it any easier to maintain the 3.5? That might be one option, if the classes are that tough. You do have to consider that she may no longer be one of the top students - the lower half of the pool was eliminated once she left high school. It’s much harder to maintain a high GPA in college.</p>

<p>If she’s really miserable, then yes she should consider a transfer, but she needs to figure out what is making her miserable. If it’s the workload, she needs to find another school with a lighter workload, or one where need-based aid will be enough that she doesn’t feel pressured to maintain the 3.5. If it’s the general atmosphere, she needs to be sure she’s not transferring into another school with a similar atmosphere.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>I don’t think this is always true. Sometimes, a workplace can be much more flexible than college. On a job, you can build up equity. Then, when something interferes with your performance for a short period of time, people will put up with it because they know that you will be returning to your former standard of performance. In college, you have different classes every semester; there’s no opportunity to build up equity, and you’re judged by your performance right now.</p>

<p>One of my kids, now out of college and working, was just called for grand jury duty and has no legitimate way to avoid it. The time commitment is huge, and it will greatly interfere with work, but the employer is being very cooperative and helpful. Heaven help a person who is called for grand jury duty while in college.</p>

<p>Similarly, one of my colleagues at work recently had a serious illness (involving hospitalization) and missed two weeks of work. The impact on him was basically nonexistent. Other people covered for him on time-sensitive projects, and less time-sensitive projects were simply delayed. But a student who misses two weeks during the middle of a semester can have huge difficulties.</p>

<p>As others have pointed out, the scholarship that your DD was offered straight out of high school is likely to be off the table. Most school are not nearly as generous to transfer students. But I think you daughter can give it a go in terms to applying for a transfer and see how the numbers work out. If it would be affordable. Undergoing the transfer application would give your DD some incentive to keep her grades up, and something to look forward to, though it seems to me that she is doing very well and is motivated, excellent student. She is to be commended, and gets top kudos from me. </p>

<p>Also, maybe taking different courses would be of help. The first year, base courses are often the ones with a lot of students, impersonal, etc, and as one moves on up, the classes get more specialized and more personal, has been my experience. My son enjoyed his second semester sophomore year courses a lot as none of them were lecture hall type, nor will they be for next year. His freshman year was comprised almost totally of that sort, typical in a large university. Yes, there were the recitations, but for him, they were not particularly nurturing as they were almost all taught by foreign grad students who were not particularly caring at all, and difficult to understand as well. So it was at his large university, a huge change from his private school where the teachers all know the students well and tend to go that extra mile. But it does get better.</p>

<p>But go on ahead and work towards a transfer and applying for aid for those choices. Until it’s all on the table as real choices, we can only speculate. Sometimes just undergoing the transfer process changes the mind of the student. I know a number of kids who applied for transfers, and decided to stay when accepted, also some who did leave and are happier at their new schools. My friend’s DD did file for transfer on the late side and was accepted but not until the second semester of the next year. But when financial aid or merit money is needed, that can be a stumbling block, But you gotta play to win.</p>

<p>I think, at the very least, your daughter could look into it. It certainly won’t hurt. And she might feel better about a decision to stay if she doesn’t find anything that’s workable. </p>

<p>Find out if in-state tuition is still an option at K-state. Some individual schools within a public system, even without official reciprocity agreements, will offer in-state rates to students very close to the border (and like you said, she graduated from a Kansas high school), even as transfers. But, you can’t know if you don’t ask.</p>

<p>K-State doesn’t offer much if anything to transfer students. My student transferred though they say when you are looking there’s lots of help, we’ve not found any</p>

<p>I am familiar with both KU and KSU. While they are both large schools, they are very different. I do think KSU is perhaps a little more warm and fuzzy. I guess I would consider what made her choose KU over KSU in the first place. Even if she isn’t crazy about KU, she still might feel KSU is not the right place. Of the many we know who looked at both schools, they all had a definite preference. </p>

<p>I agree that a 3.5 is a really high standard and it would cause a lot of stress knowing that failing to attain it means losing your scholarship. A high GPA is hardest to achieve and maintain during the first year. It does get easier for most students in the later years. It’s also stressful, because unlike high school, students often don’t know where they are at in terms of a class grade. If the professor curves at the end you can feel pretty uncertain for the entire semester. </p>

<p>If she is able to maintain the 3.5 through her first two semesters, that will give her a little more breathing room for next year and maybe that would alleviate some of the stress. A 3.5 requirement is the highest scholarship requirement I’ve ever heard of.</p>

<p>3.5 seems like a high bar to be compelled to maintain. Some things are just out of a student’s control. I would be seriously looking into transferring, but might not limit the search to one other school. It seems she is not happy, and has that added stress of the 3.5. What will happen if she does lose the scholarship? Will she be able to afford to stay, or will she have to transfer at that point. If she would have to transfer, I would probably try to do that now, while there is time to consider other places, without it being urgent.</p>

<p>I disagree with the comment earlier about her unhappy time at college being like Disneyland compared to her later job. It always bothers me when people respond to those who are unhappy with ‘just wait, it’s going to get worse’ type comments. If a student is having a great time in college…then that may very well be true, but a future job does not have to mean lots of stress and unhappiness!</p>

<p>Why did she pick KU over KSU in the first place?</p>

<p>It would be better to analyze what she doesn’t like about KU; although I must say that there are a ton of threads about freshmen who are unhappy at their college for whatever reason; but most seem to center on the fact that the kid doesn’t have as many “close friends” at college as they did in HS and so are feeling lonely and sad.</p>

<p>The scholarship to KSU will probably not be available to her now, but maybe she could get some sort of scholarship, albeit a much lesser amount? Scholarships are usually awarded to freshman applicants. If she had to pay the full In-state tuition, would KSU still be affordable to you?</p>

<p>I don’t know the schools, but generally public schools tend to not be very warm and fuzzy. (some) private schools can be warm and fuzzy.</p>

<p>I agree that the 3.5 GPA cutoff is high and would create stress. I like a previous poster’s idea about considering taking fewer “honors” classes to keep the GPA up.</p>

<p>Thank you ALL from the bottom of my heart. I am learning a lot from your advice and I so appreciate your generosity in posting information and advice!!! To answer some questions… She tells me more today… she is VERY unhappy. (I underestimated just how unhappy.) Obviously, I am beyond sorry to learn this… much less at this fairly late date. I made an incorrect statement. She does not have to keep a 3.5. To keep her scholarship which she NEEDS to afford KU she must keep a 3.4. Right now, heading into finals she has a 3.37. She tells me that she is really tired of walking around and feeling like a total failure with a 3.3 GPA. The honors program there… which she was also admitted to requires only a 3.2. She is not worried about losing that rating. She feels like she can do that part without stressing completely. In fact… she most enjoys her honors classes and those are here highest grades. She may or may not be right… but she thinks that when finals are over she will likely NOT hit the required 3.4. I am so sorry for her. She is working hard and is a great kid. :(</p>

<p>Merit awards are tough to get as a transfer. Your daughter should look at in-state public options if she wants/needs to transfer. There are colleges still accepting applications even at this late date - what is your home state?</p>