from a Catholic high school in our city. Academically, he was holding his own, but socially, it wasn’t a great experience. For the first time in his life, he threatened another student, and did it in an e-mail. He would be expelled, but we were given the opportunity to voluntarily withdraw him so he can transfer. Anyone have experience with transferring their child into another high school, particularly a Catholic high school? Thanks!
I don’t have experience with this, but let me tell you what I do know as a parent of children that went through the Catholic school system. 1. Lots of kids end up withdrawing and transferring to another Catholic school. 2. These schools usually need the tuition dollars, and often accept kids with blemishes 3. if you are staying anywhere in the same geographic area, word spreads. 4. Administrators at these schools all know each other well…I don’t know if they are allowed to talk about individual students to each other, but I’d be shocked if the prospective school doesn’t find out what’s going on before deciding on your son’s application.
If it were me, I’d have my son in therapy to give him the tools on how to better manage pain, how to ask for help, and to learn how to integrate into a new situation better. I’d also make him do some form of restitution, whether to the kid he threatened or just a general societal thing. These 2 things are foremost to improve him as a person and help him in life. BUT, I think it also puts him in a good position with any prospective school. Everyone knows kids make mistakes, the question is what they learn from them and if they change. The therapist should have some good ideas about the process of getting him into a new school. You might also be able to go back to speak to the administration of the old school to tell them what your son is doing, and ask them for help and ideas about placement next year.
Good luck, and sorry if it’s too generalized. Hopefully someone with direct experience will answer too. Maybe post this on the parent’s thread also, rather than just the learning differences thread so you get a wider pool of responders.
I agree with the first post. You said he threatened another student for the first time. Your statement suggests your son has had social and behavioral difficulty in the past.
Personally, if I had a son with significant social problems, I would have him in therapy immediately. The major issue to me is stabilizing and then improving your son’s social behavior. Social problems follow us in adulthood. The older we get, often, the more like ourselves we become
After I had a very good sense of his social behavior, I would disclose his problems with the new school and have a letter from his therapist about risks, how to calm you son if he has a problem in school and if there are behaviors that could set him off.
Obviously, I don’t know very much about you son and his social problems. However, behavior difficulties must be resolved while he is young and he has not accumulated a poor record that will follow him. I would tend to disclose my son’s problems. What would you want parents to do if a student like your son enrolled in his school and acted out. Christian Brothers supposedly help difficult boys and provide an excellent education. Mullen HS in Denver had a good reputation for both.
Good luck. I attended Catholic school pre-kiindergarten through college and loved it.
Sophomore year at DD’s Catholic high school classmate had the same situation, but it was early in the school year. Parents immediately put student in counseling and enrolled student in accredited online high school program. The next school year student was accepted at a small private non-religious school. I don’t know how much administrators talk, but these parents had taken corrective steps with the student, and they were not looking for a scholarship.