<p>Best of luck to you NCDad and your son (and the rest of your family) tomorrow. Give your son big hugs before he goes to bed tonight and tell him that you love him and will always support him. He knows it, but he can’t hear it too many times.</p>
<p>Hugs to all of you!</p>
<p>Sending more ((HUGS)) your way. I am thinking about all of you and sending up prayers for your dear son. He is so blessed to have supportive parents. Your willingness to share your story will help many families and remind us all how things can change with one decision. Thank you.</p>
<p>Hugs, best wishes, and I hope that this turns out as well as possible for you and and your family.</p>
<p>I’m sitting here thinking about you and your family too. Hoping things are working out as well as they can.</p>
<p>Why are you consoling him? My parents would be ripping in to me in many different ways and where I go to college would not matter. When I was growing up, my mom’s friend lost her 3 children to a drugged driver. People die every single day, victims of drunk drivers. Stop consoling him and worry about his drinking at such a young age, and worse, drunk driving. He was not just drinking, he was driving under the influence. </p>
<p>Consider not allowing him to go off to college. Have him live at home to go to college. Otherwise, next time, he might end up dead, or worse, someone else might end up dead. That is not ok.</p>
<p>undecided, not to be rude, but you’re exhibiting some of the black-and-white thinking you accuse your dad of having in your thread about applying to college.</p>
<p>undecided2014 it is very apparent that, unlike many of us, you have not read the 600 posts in this thread. Among other things, the posters are consoling the PARENT. His kid is probably going to jail. He is disappointed, afraid for his kid, unsure of how best to handle the situation etc. The kid has taken plenty of heat in this thread. The discussion has been long and hard. No one here has suggested the kid get off. Many have assumed he is an alcoholic, troubled youth without ever knowing him. NO ONE including the OP thinks that what happened is ok. If you had read the posts you would know that.</p>
<p>^ That. You can hate the behavior and still be compassionate to the kid and his dad, who have shown themselves to be remorseful, willing to do the right thing and have thought long and hard about this. Posters have been appropriately scolding, worried about other issues and ultimately supportive and compassionate.</p>
<p>Undecided, this young man made a terrible mistake. Fortunately no one was injured or killed. I think it has been a tremendous wake up call for him and a very traumatic experience for the whole family.</p>
<p>I understand your passion, given the horrors of your mom’s friend went through. But please be careful with your words. These are parents concerned and hurting for their child. There’s no way you can understand how it feels. Try to be compassionate.</p>
<p>Is that common these days for kids to get arrested for DUI on prom night? I thought a lot of communities had instituted buses and limos and things like that specifically to keep kids off the road.</p>
<p>^ I don’t know if it’s common to get arrested . But no buses are used at our high school. My son drove a bunch of his friends in our SUV into Atlanta for his prom and most the kids at his school either drove with other friends or had their parents drive them. I think a few kids used limos but it’s not that common.</p>
<p>Here in New Jersey every kid takes a limo of some kind (some of them book those big party buses) to the prom. However, the tradition is to then drive afterwards down to the shore to continue the celebration (usually for a night or two).</p>
<p>you can’t legally punish people for what didn’t happen, it didnt happen, call it luck or whatever, but you can’t punish for an “if”</p>
<p>the yuong man DIDNT kill or hurt anyone, so how can he be punished for that? </p>
<p>i don’t think a young life should be wrecked but at the same time they need to take responsibilty for their actions</p>
<p>i wish the family well, and I hope the punishment isn’t some sort of exapmple for others, as that isn’t fair or he isnt punished for “what ifs”</p>
<p>sending cyber hugs</p>
<p>Thanks for all the cyber hugs folks. All your support has been really helpful.</p>
<p>The judge accepted our plea to level 2 (original charge was level 1) and sentenced him to 10 days in the county jail, 1 year’s suspended license, and a $1,000 fine plus some other court costs. That was about what we had expected, with the only disappointment being that he won’t be able to break the jail time up into weekends as we had hoped.</p>
<p>Obviously this is heartbreaking but the judge did seem to appreciate how he was trying to take responsibility for this, as she said her initial instinct was to give him the full 30. I was shocked at how quickly the whole thing was over; they called the case, entered the plea, the judge spoke for a couple minutes about the seriousness of DUI, and then it was done and he was led out in cuffs without us getting another chance to talk to him.</p>
<p>We’ll see how the next 10 days go. I’m more scared for his physical wellness than his mental health for the moment. He did some research about jail and talked to his counselor to try to mentally prepare himself, and while I’m sure it will still be emotionally trying my wife and I are more concerned about our 5-7, 140 lb, physically young 17 year old being housed alongside grown men and hardened criminals.</p>
<p>Thanks again for all your support and love.</p>
<p>Thanks for letting us know what happened. I know the next 10 days will be tough–probably as tough if not tougher on you and your wife as they will be for your son. Hang in there!</p>
<p>I’m sorry to hear your son ended up with jail time. I was hoping he wouldn’t have to spend time in jail. I’m surprised they didn’t let you break up the time to weekends and he was taken right away. It’s got to be a very scary time for all of you. I hope that they have some sort of separation for younger people in jail such as your son from the general male population. I’ll be praying that the 10 days goes by quickly and safely for him.</p>
<p>Dear NC Dad,
I wish you and your family peace and success in dealing with the next 10 days. I know it is little consolidation, but do remember that it could have been so much worse.
Your son and family need your strength, now more than ever.
Best wishes and good luck.</p>
<p>Oh, NCDad, how difficult for all of you. I’m sorry.</p>
<p>If at some point you could fill us in about what happened with the other kids, I’d appreciate it. Now that 21yo ds1 is home from college I’ve told him this tale and warned him about providing alcohol to his 18yo brother and friends.</p>
<p>Shaking my head in disbelief that a 17 year old will be housed with grown men and hardened criminals…</p>
<p>NCDad, echoing what others have said: I feel for you and your family. Was hoping for a different outcome. Praying the next 10 days will go quickly and uneventfully.
Sending prayers for your continued strength, and best wishes to you all…</p>
<p>Thank you for sharing the outcome with us. What a tough moment to experience! </p>
<p>I will be praying for your son and his well being during the next ten days. My heart goes out to you and your wife.</p>