Hi guys this is my first post here. I’m a sophomore at a big ten school and have hit the sophomore slump. It is definitely a real thing and I’ve realized I’ve lost about half my good friends from last year due to the fact I rarely get to see them or we just don’t stay in touch. I am a pre Med student and spend a good amount of time studying but I also like to go party with friends. That being said I kind of screwed up and decided not to go Greek life and it’s too late now. My close friends I do still have including my roommates are either going out to their frat or don’t go out at all. I feel like I just didn’t ever find that group of friends that was similar to me and I’m pretty unhappy. My group of friends back home is way stronger and I don’t dislike my roommates but first semester of sophomore year was kind of depressing and just full of studying. I don’t want to feel that unhappy for the next 2.5 years here and I want to make a change.
I’m a very normal person who is social w meeting random people when going out etc. I just feel I got super unlucky. It seems sort of forced or weird to try to join random ■■■ to meet friends and I feel the friends I could meet from mutual friends are in fraternities and they kind of only hang with that crowd which I can’t really go to.
I’ve thought about transferring to the big ten college by my home and I do have good friends there, but it’s a big decision to leave a superior university to go to a new one and hope things are better.
Honestly I feel lost, discouraged, and confused. I have no idea how to shake things up and turn them around socially where I’m at now and I don’t want to have to transfer but I also feel the only thing keeping me is the decently better reputation of academics my current school has.
If anyone has any advice it would be appreciated.
Thanks for reading this guys
What makes you think you’ll find new friends as a Jr. at a new school that you couldn’t find at your current school. If it’s just about friends and socialization I’d see if you can alter course at the current school. Good luck.
Are you sure it isn’t too late to join a fraternity in the fall. My son’s fraternity had a junior pledge this semester because the guy realized all his friends were in the fraternity and his friends wanted him in. If that would make you happy look into it. Mine is at a Big 12 school and he is pre-vet and studies all the time but unwinds with his fraternity friends and his gf and her sorority friends. He has other friends too but since he is fraternity president this year there isn’t a lot of time. Just something to think about. Mine didn’t pledge first semester freshman year (main time at his school) but pledged the following semester. They don’t do formal rush for guys at his school.
It’s kind of too late here at my school yes. And the reason I say I could have more success at the new school socially is that it’s close to home so I have 2 of my best friends there and I’ve made some good connections through their new college friends
If you are truly unhappy then transfer. Life is too short to spend a few years unhappy. Just make sure you do all of your research regarding getting into a specific major and how your current credits will transfer.
I have a friend who transferred from a well known university to another well known university. They told him all of his credits would transfer. When he got to the transfer school, they told him that they all transferred but they were not accepting any toward his major. This bit of information was left out. This was going to add an entire year to his undergrad. He only stayed one semester and transferred back to his original institution where they accepted everything and he was back on track to graduate in 3 1/2 to 4 years.
I disagree with @bhs1978 If your issue is that you dont’ have friends because they are in Fraternities, you would run into the same problem at another Uni.
Start looking for other places to make friends…form a study group for Ochem. Join a service club/fraternity. Join a house of worship. Join any clubs.
Also go to the counseling center and make sure you are not having depression.
@wiskom, I’m sorry you are experiencing this slump. Just wanted to reiterate what @bhs1978 said about making sure your credits transfer into your major, not just as generic credits, should you decide to transfer. You do not want to inadvertently add more time and dollars to your undergrad experience since you will also have med school to follow and pay for as well.
I know joining groups may seem like a forced way to make friends but is there maybe a group for pre med students at your current school that you could join? If there is, maybe some of these students would like to socialize?
There are some clubs I’m sure I can look into. Sometimes I don’t like those because I feel the kids seem to just not have similar interests or getting to know people seems super forced. Especially if it’s both of those combined it just kind of seems like a waste of time. But it is something I should look back into.
so wait… do you think its too late to rush because most of the other students in your pledge class would be younger? Don’t let that stop you. If you wish you had gone Greek - go Greek. Don’t delay. I wouldn’t suggest transferring. This is life - there are bumps. You’re at a superior university - don’t walk away. Just improve your situation.
I am going to be a junior next year and so especially because Greek life is pretty big here there is no way it’s going to work out next year. I made the bad decision of both times rushing as a sophomore I suicide rushed but those were kind of the only 2 I would have actually joined. And the thing that I don’t understand is it went well and I get along with them (I’m not weird I swear lol) but for some reason I still didn’t get a bid or maybe even close to one. My friends in the frats didn’t have much influence and it sucks to be rejected like that. Oh well.
The thing that sucks the most is I got the vibe with a few people especially we could actually be super good friends, but because I am not in their frat now that kind of is such a stigma I won’t see them/ talk to them maybe ever again or very rarely.
It kind of sounds like the main thing bumming you out is the fact that Greek life didn’t work out. Is that true? Because listen, Greek life has pros and cons and everyone has a different opinion, but it’s definitely not something worth losing sleep over. Don’t let this one little thing ruin your entire college experience. So I wouldn’t completely rule out transferring, but I encourage you to find a different group/club/organization/ANYTHING where you can make friends. Seriously, try to find somewhere you can make friends that doesn’t revolve whether or not you “make the cut”, even if it’s off campus. Real life is a lot bigger than Greek life, even though it can seem like that big a deal when you’re at a school where it’s really popular. So try to branch out and make friends elsewhere, and if it’s just not feeling right then take a look at transferring. Either way, you’ll be okay.
By the way, if there are people who you feel like won’t accept you as a friend because you’re not a part of their frat, those aren’t friends worth having. Good luck!
Are you still expecting to apply to med school? How is your GPA? So important to keep up the GPA, seek out the health professional clubs on your campus, get involved in student life, touch base with your advisor and counseling center. Don’t rush into a transfer without trying other things first.
Agree with post #11. If you are premed your first priority is preparing for the MCAT and doing well in your classes, and participating in ec’s that will make you a strong applicant for med school. If you plan to attend med school without a gap year after graduation then that means you needs to have your application ready by summer right after junior year when the application cycle starts. You will need recommendations or a committee letter from your school so transferring may mess things up for you or force you to take a gap year. You will have a lot on your plate in the coming year. Prioritize what is more important to you. Have a strong application for med school or joining some fraternity at this time. You could be utilizing your free time to make your med school application strong instead. Outside your med school activities it is important to develop interests and hobbies that you are passionate about.
Start making a plan to prepare for the MCAT and have a date in mind for when you plan to take it. Allow enough time to prepare so that you don’t have to take it again.
I completely agree and I hope you see this because I’d love to see your response. Your right. Those things are more important and I’m the kind of person that has very high expectations and if I don’t hit those academically I take it harshly and I do my best to score well in everything. That being said… I am not the type of person that is okay sitting around and only studying or sitting around in my free time and just watching tv. I like to be out doing things and going out to bars when I can. My friend group here just kind of split after last year and my closer friends don’t go much but sit around and smoke. The other friends I have are always doing Greek life stuff I can’t go to. So while I’m sure I could get lucky and find some other friends eventually, I feel like I have a pretty close group at the school I’d consider transferring to and while it is scary and I never expected to leave this great school, there isn’t more than just academics and I’m not 100% sure but I’m hoping I’d be happier there. Sophomore slump is real. I still don’t know what to do yet and it’s a very tough decision I don’t want to screw up.