<p>Some of us felt your question was off topic and not appropriate. The OP was not asking for opinions on the merits of joining a sorority. She was asking for support while she waited for her D to finish the process; she was not providing a forum that would serve to furnish you with understanding about why people choose to go Greek.</p>
<p>I don’t feel your question is necessarily a bad one in a different context, i.e. a thread whose purpose is to debate the merits of going Greek. There have been plenty of those on CC; it is a subject which apparently never gets stale, so I’m sure if you wanted to start a thread on it, you’d get some good discussion on the subject. Or you could do a search; there was a thread not overly too long ago which got a whole lot of traffic. I found it quite interesting.</p>
<p>I’m here to echo OP’s original sentiment – it’s stressful – just got off the phone with D who filled me in. Lots of visits, lots of interviews/conversations with current members. Trying to find the right fit and hoping that the one you want also wants you. I never did a sorority, but it sounds like fun, and a way to build lifelong friendships.</p>
<p>I am so glad that D’s school only has 4 sororities,and recruitment was very low key. I was reading about recruitment at SEC schools, and some of them try to attract girls during accepted student events while they are in HS. I am sure that if D went to a school like that, she would most likely not try to join, and I would have gone over the edge with anxiety if she did.</p>
<p>My D’s experience has been positive so far, and I am personally pleased with their rules regarding grades, community service, and attire while ‘wearing letters’.</p>
<p>I was never in one, but I am glad my D found one she likes, especially since she is at a school with 70% males, it is nice to have good female friends.</p>
<p>I think for the most part, sororities (and this is a huge stereotype and I am speaking of deep Southern competitive schools) attract girly girl type women who like to just be girls. They giggle, they like to shop, they like “hang out”, BUT they are also highly driven, well educated, extremely smart, well-traveled, etc. Most girls that my daughter hangs out are not into any type of video gaming and even though they use Facebook for a tool, it is not their social outlet. They like to actually be with each other, not looking at each other on Facebook. They are typically team spirited, wearing their game day dresses and enjoying their football games and rooting for their team. They are sponges for the college experience, the education, the social, the culture. But they don’t forget their privilege either. They are deeply rooted in their philanthropies, making sure they honor the roots of the women before them. They are so in love with what their sisterhood stands for that when recruitment comes around and they are on the other side, it is such an easy sale for them. They truly love where they are and they want everyone to love it too. Which is why they can’t understand why you wouldn’t want to be Greek. Which is why a T-Shirt is made for every single thing they do. They love their letters and they wear them proud and loud, hoping that everyone can catch the spirit of sisterhood that they are experiencing. People who are not Greek don’t get it. People who are Greek don’t get why you don’t get it. It is a circle. A. never. ending. circle.</p>
<p>okay I was trying very hard not to respond since I’ve written more than enough on this board about my views on sorority life and rush. However I am “Greek” and college shopping isn’t speaking for me… though I like the majority of the above post :)</p>
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<p>okay - put me in the set of people who are Greek (as is everyone in my family for several generations) and think that rush is one of the worst ideas ever… and question whether sororities and fraternities should exist…
and this set is not a group of one ;)</p>
<p>It is like college admissions imho and best to have at least a little insider information… like if recs are needed. It is pretty hard to win if you don’t even know the rules.</p>
<p>OP: I am so glad your daughter got a bid and hope she is very happy with her sorority experience.:)</p>
<p>I’ll admit that I personally don’t get the appeal, either - but I certainly get that my daughters have had worthwhile, very positive experiences in their sororities. I know there are other ways for college women to make close friendships, support causes, be social, etc. But my ds have found those things, to a considerable extent though not exclusively, in their sororities. Their Greek involvement has been an opportunity for me to learn that my kids are going to make their own decisions, and do things I wouldn’t necessarily do, and - because they’re adults - that’s fine. (It’s been easier for me to deal with than the one non-Greek d whose political opinions are quite different from those in the house where she was raised. :D)</p>
<p>I don’t think that outsiders (like myself) would have as much difficulty understanding Greek life if the selection process was a kinder, gentler one. I know there are schools where potential members are guaranteed a bid if they maximize their opportunities at each point - i.e., if they don’t refuse invitations from the houses that invite them to the next round. So at schools like that, I guess the initial decision is - does the potential member want to be in Greek life, or only in one of the “good” sororities. </p>
<p>Just my musings on the subject. I agree with collegeshopping that this will never be resolved on CC (or probably anywhere else).</p>
<p>I had no idea how intense this can be. My daughter didn’t seem stressed about her recruitment at all…just excited . Now she is the vp of her sorority and very involved with recruitment herself.
As a side note , there was a girl that graduated from her high school a year after her that she was acquainted with that was not recruited for her sorority and she blamed my daughter ( who had no input ) Though she was chosen by another sorority and seems very happy there , she apparently holds some sort of grudge towards my D.</p>
<p>Being active in her sorority has been a very positive experience for my daughter</p>
<p>Bay - agree with you totally. Having fun is precisely the reason to do it. My S just joined a fraternity (coincidentally, the same one that H was in, which is kind of cool) and he’s having a blast. We WANT him to have a blast. All too often, “serious” smart kids didn’t have major social lives in high school.</p>
<p>I joined a sorority for the fun. I went to a college that didn’t have much of a social scene, except for the sororities and fraternities. There was nothing at all to do off campus. The town wanted no part of college partying. Things have changed over the years and the town is more accommodating. The college was also known to be quite intense academically and the sorority house was a place where there was always something going on to serve as a relief. Someone was usually baking or cooking, a game a bridge could usually be found and at lunch time, there was the ritual of watching, heckling and the throwing of orange peels at the “The Young and the Restless.” The thing I remember most about being in a sorority was the laughter. They were some of the smartest, funniest people I have ever met and there was instant access. I really don’t think my college experience would have been as memorable without being in a sorority. That being said, I know my experience at this college was incredibly different from those at the larger universities where the Greek scene was more prevalent. Less than 20% of my campus was Greek.</p>
<p>What I am learning so far is that my D’s sorority has 50+ pledges in her class some of whom were in my D’s large co-ed dorm. She had not really talked to these particular girls before and is suddenly having dinner and planning social events with them this week. She is in an intense major at a very competitive school and I can already see the benefits of having a structured social life where she can participate in events without having to plan them herself. THat is really a big benefit for her…she is not a big social risk taker and this will automatically involve her in lots of social events and “FUN” as others have pointed out. She told me last night she is looking forward to living at the house next year and it sounds like a really nice place to live. If there are any downsides I haven’t found them yet…</p>
<p>Having a structured social life and having “forced” or at least highly encouraged interactions (whether same sex or opposite sex) is VERY GOOD for those of us who were on the nerd-side in high school. Seriously. It was good for someone like me who had previously been of the steady-boyfriend-persuasion to go to exchanges and meet a bunch of guys and try them out. My only regret is that i didn’t meet more. Ha ha.</p>