Special needs student help

Parents Forum
1

My S18 has done very well beyond anything we could have thought for him when he was 5 years old and not talking. However, though he talks up a storm now, and has a very good GPA, 3.8 UW, and decent SAT score, 1350, he is missing the ECs that one would expect from a student with such stats, and he will have three AP and one honors class only when he graduates.

He has one EC for four years, but it is only a half hour per week and not full year. He can put band in as another EC, although it is a subject in school too so very weak. And he has no leadership, nothing. It was a huge chore to get him to do those two ECs, and the two other ECs he was interested in conflicted with IEP services so he couldn’t do them. He can’t do sports due to his disability.

Where does that put him to get into a college on par with his stats? I’m not looking for particular colleges as much as others who might have or had children in the same situation to see if there is any advice.

We are also looking at some other options:

  • a gap year where he can volunteer or otherwise kind of “fill in” the missing ECs somehow, or
  • a gap year where he can learn to be more independent - he was getting a lot of services through 9th and 10th grade, fewer this year, and IEP has fewer next year in 12th grade, but he likely would need more of a transition.

Any thoughts on this would be great. We aren’t as worried about the disability services on campus when he does go to college as getting to the right opportunity. We expect he’d be able to go to college by himself.

The only other thing I am not sure about is how much to talk about his disability on college applications. Would it be good in terms of diversity or extenuating circumstances to say he is on the autism spectrum? Or should we keep quiet about it?

2

Some schools do not care about ECs at all. Is he planning on an elite school?

3

Does his HS have a college counselor you can discuss your concerns with? My kids also had chronic health issues (though no IEP). Both participated in far fewer activities than they would have if they had been healthy. They were both still accepted and matriculated at a great private U. S even got a generous merit award. It was the same U many of their healthy peers chose.

Both mentioned their chronic health issues in passing in their essay and their counselor did as well. It was NOT focused upon by anyone.

4

Do you have in-state options that he would like? I would talk to the guidance counselor about your concerns regarding how to discuss the disability.

5

Google colleges for students with learning disabilities. There is also a guidebook out there. Visit some and see if you think he is ready before deciding that he needs a year off. I don’t know your son, but some kids would really backslide academically over a gap year, and there are schools out there that provide support services towards making the transition to college life.

University of Arizona SALT program is one, but I know there are others.

6

The guidance counselor can mention that he is a very good student but due to the need for services after school for an accommodated disability, he could not participate in as many extracurriculars as me might be expected to do, including sports. Putting the one EC and band on the EC section will be fine.

I think he will do fine with admissions.

No need to tell the schools about his being on the autism spectrum but no need to hide it either.

There are certainly schools that offer support for kids on the autism spectrum. Other options might be to live at home and commute (at least at first) or go to a school close by.

I always suggest that parents research the best accommodations and then put a list in a letter (written by parent) for a professional MD or neuropysch. or whatever, to sign. Take it to the disabilities office and they will give your son letters for each professor saying he is registered (with no info on what the disability is) and should be accommodated. Often a dean and also health services is involved in actually enforcing the accommodations.

Good luck!

ps does he have accommodations for SAT’s ?

7

My D16 with ASD graduated from HS last year and is finishing up her freshman year at UCLA. She had a very good GPA and excellent SAT scores, but, like your son, had basically no EC’s other than Girl Scouts. No leadership, no clubs at school, nothing really beyond academics. She also took only three AP classes and a couple of honors classes. That’s about all she could handle through high school and why she was so successful academically (plus being a good standardized test taker didn’t hurt). She wrote her Common App essay about being autistic and one of the UC essays as well. She got into all but one of the nine schools she applied to, most of them state schools here in CA. I thought she had a slim chance of getting into any of the top UCs because of her lack of EC’s or even volunteer hours (she had some but not much). Clearly, I was wrong. She has done well academically so far, but, like in HS, hasn’t been able to do much else besides her classes. It works for her though, and so far she seems to be happy at UCLA.

8

There are PLENTY of colleges that don’t really weigh those ECs very heavily.

And there are plenty of colleges where your kiddo will get accepted without ECs or volunteering hours.

If the only reason for a gap year is to,get ECs and volunteer hours…I would say…please reconsider.

Start looking for colleges that want kids like yours!

9

Agree with above. I think that she has done a great job!!! In regard to disability services, we made sure to bring the most current psych testing and IEP to the disabilities office. We made an appt with the person in charge, who easily connected with DD. She discussed the huge variety of support available, and invited her to visit her the first month of school to brainstorm. DD was willing to do so, but never needed the help. I would highly encourage this approach! I think it was a distinct stress reducer to have the door open if needed.

10

I had a similar thread a few weeks ago - my daughter, who is adopted internationally and spent some time in an orphanage, has very good grades, but doesn’t test well and only has one sport as an EC - but it has been a long term activity. The comments I got about her situation with the experienced folks here on CC were very encouraging. I feel more positive about her college app process that she will begin next year as a junior. I was told that there will be many schools in our area that will recognize that a 4.0 UW GPA (so far) is a noteworthy accomplishment even if her tests scores are just average and her EC’s are few.

I think your son’s stats are very impressive - you should be very proud. I’m also confident that there will be many schools that will recognize his accomplishments. My daughter could name the states and capitals when she was three, but I’ll eat my hat if she scores above 1100 on the SAT.

I do have the same dilemma as you concerning my older daughter who will be going to school in the fall at highly ranked LAC. She is also adopted and had lead poisoning as an infant. In her stressful junior year, she just became totally unfocused and wasn’t able to concentrate to study for long periods of time and was completely unmotivated in her college app process the following summer. She just wasn’t engaged for about 8 months. She has always been extremely hyperactive, but she has been able to excel in school and EC’s until then - (she did great during her senior year ending up with a 4.57 for the year without the stress of the college app process). I have been thinking that maybe I should inform the college about this part of her background (she has never been tested for an LD nor has she ever needed an IEP) just in case she encountered similar problems in her college transition. I’m on the fence like you. I don’t want to tell the administration and have them think that she is “deficient” in some way, but I think it might be wise to tell them proactively. I’ll be following this thread to see what the general consensus is - so far it seems to lean towards sharing the info with the college (even though she has had no LD testing or IEP, and I probably can’t even find the medical documentation that stated she had lead poisoning - I filed it away somewhere 17 years ago). Hopefully they’ll take my word on that.

11

What do you think the information could do or change? Say she did fail a class, how would having the information on file change anything? The disabilities office doesn’t look for warning signs or call students in who ‘seem’ to be having trouble with the transition.

If you think she has a learning disability, I think it is your responsibility to have the testing done and have the accommodations she needs presented to the disabilities office. They can do testing at (some) schools, but it will cause a delay in getting services if you wait until there is a need for accommodations. I’m sure your pediatrician has the records for the lead levels, but I’m not sure what good they would do. My daughter also had high lead levels, and we just watched them to make sure they went down. They will never go all the way down, but they do improve.

12

I’m under the impression that colleges care most about the student’s ability to succeed academically. Many of them state that they look at what courses a student has taken in high school and if the student challenged him or herself with a rigorous curriculum. I went to a session at BU with admissions counselors who said ECs were not important to them nearly as much because the point of college is academics – you don’t even need to be in college to have outside activities but you do need to know how to study and be academically curious.

My son also had a language delay, due to hearing loss in his case. (He also closed the gap and is very talkative and scores well in reading/verbal.) He has just finished his freshman year. He does not choose to have any in-class accommodations. At this point it is up to hm to ask for it. He is at a LAC (Skidmore) where the class sizes are small. I am confident they would provide accommodations from my conversations with them, but it s up to him to ask and he hasn’t felt he needs it. There is a lot of variation in what schools are willing to provide. It is important to feel them out during visits.

My son did mention his hearing loss in the “extra information” question in the Common App. He used it for an extra diversity short essay asked for by one college (was waitlisted at that school btw). I think he told his guidance counselor it was ok to mention hearing loss in her letter.

13

I think all ECs are on the app only to show what kids do during the time they aren’t in school, sleeping or studying. That is a limited amount of time each week in reality.

14

ECs do not get a kid into college. I certainly wouldn’t dream of a gap year just to do ECs. If your child wants a gap year, that’s totally different. The counselor should refer to the disability in the LOR and that it limits the ability to do ceratin things. It will probably not be an issue.

Your child should be choosing schools based on his stats. He should have plenty of good choices as it is.

15

Another option is to check out schools with good Spectrum Support…RIT comes to mind…

https://www.rit.edu/~w-ssp/

16

A few comments:

–As others have said, many schools don’t have a big focus on ECs. And I would have him include band – in addition to the class, he also may spend time at home practicing.

–I think a gap year would not be a “make-up” for his HS lack of ECs, but would be a separate component of the application. I would only have your S do a gap year if you all feel he would benefit from having this type of an experience. Also consider if a gap year without academics might throw him off a bit.

–His guidance counselor could mention your son’s issues in the recommendation but you may have to sign a waiver allowing him/her to do so. It is your family’s choice.

-This book may be helpful if you are interested. https://www.amazon.com/Guide-Colleges-Students-Learning-Differences/dp/1101920386/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1497383718&sr=8-1&keywords=college+learning+disabilities

–When the time comes visit the learning disability center at the final few schools. While they may offer similar services, the offices can differ in vibe, staffing levels, accessibility etc.

17

@twoinanddone

“What do you think the information could do or change?” I guess I’m thinking that the information would be useful to the college in the same way that the information provided to schools by other parents of LD/disabled kids is helpful. So that the college can support the student if they encounter problems or need some type of accommodation.

“If you think she has a learning disability, I think it is your responsibility to have the testing done and have the accommodations she needs presented to the disabilities office.” I guess I could have been a little clearer in my description, but I am hijacking the thread and didn’t want to go into a lot of details. But here goes - I don’t know exactly what is required to test/document a student for a LD in college vs. K-12. I know in K-12 there is a formal process that is required to provide accommodations but since she hasn’t needed any yet, we’ve never gone thru this formal process with her. That’s what I meant when I said she has never been tested - that she hasn’t gone thru the testing procedure required by public schools and has never had/needed an IEP. So we don’t have any of that sort of documentation. She WAS tested for ADHD by a neurologist last year when she hit a wall who talked to both her and me about her behaviors and he also had her complete a questionnaire. From what I understand this is a common way to diagnose ADHD as there is no standard process. He determined that she did indeed, without a doubt, have ADHD which I was certain of before she was 2 years old. She repeated kindergarten partly due to the recommendation of her first year K teacher re her ability to sit still - not due to any learning deficiencies. She was/is very bright and never needed any academic accommodations. She was prescribed meds last year after her evaluation, but she ended up in the ER at 2am due to a bad reaction after her first and only dose. So she has never been medicated. But I was assuming that a letter from a neurologist would suffice as documentation of a disability for college. I will certainly be in contact to see if my assumption is correct or not.

“I’m sure your pediatrician has the records for the lead levels, but I’m not sure what good they would do. My daughter also had high lead levels, and we just watched them to make sure they went down. They will never go all the way down, but they do improve.” Yes I’m sure the pediatrician has the documentation, but we have moved three times since she was an infant, and I don’t even remember her doctor’s name so I might not be able to provide the records. But I disagree with you about what good they would do. Her levels of lead put her into the “poisoned” category. They were not just elevated. The doctor had to report her poisoning to the State and a woman had to come to our house and give us a talk - just to comply with state policy, because they knew she wasn’t exposed in the U.S. Lead poisoning is not a trivial matter, NO level of lead is safe for a child, especially a very young child. Small levels can lead to significant brain damage, so I would think that having those records in hand would be a “good” thing just like solid documentation of any kind of disability. In case I cannot get access to the documentation, I would hope that the college would take my word for the fact that she had lead poisoning. It is very well known that this is a major issue in her birth country. And yes, we had to have her get blood tests every six months until a trend could be established that her levels were dropping. And they did improve, but that doesn’t mean that damage did not occur because of her poisoning. Studies have shown that the effects including hyperactivity, distractibility, impulsivity, disorganisation, non-persistence, … (she still exhibits all of these traits to some degree with hyperactivity being the most obvious) continue through adulthood.

" Say she did fail a class, how would having the information on file change anything?" I admit, I am a worrier. Failing her classes because of her condition is one thing I fear, but it is not the only one. Like all parents I worry about her transition to college, but I have a bit more to worry about than the average parent (most children don’t spend their first year of life in an institution) . Again, I would hope having the information on file would help her college be more understanding if the worst case scenario happened. Do I think it’s going to happen? Probably not, but I would appreciate it if her college gave her background some consideration if she again found herself in the position of being unable to perform to her usual level of competency. I think my concerns are valid, just like any other parent of a disabled child or one with a traumatic life event.

Thanks for the input.

OP, I apologize for the derailing of your thread.

18

@LeastComplicated a letter from neurologist will not suffice in terms of obtaining acommodations. Most colleges require a neuropsych evaluation. I would definitely look into one. A lot of high achieving AdHD kids find it difficult to adjust to college. Every little bit of help will go a long way in making the transition.

19

You do not need a neuropsych. evaluation to diagnose ADHD or to get accommodations. A letter from a psychiatrist or even primary care doctor would suffice. There is no test for ADHD, only a questionnaire. Neuropsych.'s will test attention and focus but will readily tell you the test is not accurate because it doesn’t reflect everyday experience: the experience at a neuropsych.'s office is one on one in an office free of distraction. I mean, they can play the radio as a rough equivalent to “distraction.” I our experience at more than one school, a letter from an MD certainly is enough to get accommodations and, as I wrote before, write the letter yourself and list accommodations wanted after research. MD’s do not know a lot about accommodations and will be grateful you did the work.

20

My kid’s evaluators have done some kind of computer based reaction test for ADHD. I’d get her evaluated.