<p>I would love it if one of my kids had been that way. I thought my S was going to be that but my D convinced him he needed to aim higher. I thought this time around it would be less stressful and less costly, but nope… $400 in application fees alone. Then $$ to send all the test scores. Then $$ to send all the CSS Profiles because the FAFSA just isn’t intrusive enough for most private schools and even our state flagship. One and done would be great with me if I could get him to do that.</p>
<p>In general, test scores will rise naturally late in junior year as kids mature and learn more material. May not be true of kids who are very gifted or precocious and top out the test earlier. But yes, you can expect higher scores.</p>
<p>I would be pretty happy if my S wanted to just apply to our state flagship. All the college search business is exhausting and can get costly. Unfortunately, with older classmates applying to Stanford, Brown, etc., he is catching the prestige bug, and I’m afraid I may have to humor him at app time. But I think I’ll let it all be on him and not get too involved. If he comes up with ideas and plans, I’ll go along. But I’m not going to be the one pushing.</p>
<p>It’s great that you have a viable state flagship school option. Be happy. A fine school, but not unattainable. In our state and the next one to the east, kids can’t get into the flagship with a 3.5 anymore, really. It’s nuts. And other states, like Illinois, have sky-high in-state prices unaffordable to many.</p>
<p>I know we are lucky that it is still easy to get into all of our state schools My sister is in a Chicago suburb and she told me 75% of the kids at her daughters school scored over a 27 on the ACT in her class!!! She said it is crazy the amount of prep work these kids put into it. They spend thousands and thousands of dollars (and years) prepping. The school doesnt even rank the kids because so many are 4.0 and higher! I am not sure if my niece even applied anywhere in Illinois, she applied at Bama, LSU, Mizzou and a couple other schools but ultimately decided on LSU. They had a lot of money set aside for college for her too, but she took a full scholarship to LSU and they are saving it for grad school.</p>
<p>My other sister lives in NC and she was saying that her step daughter was struggling to get into state schools last year too. I believe she ended up going to Wake Tech CC. Her stats were not low at all and she won awards for all the volunteer work she did with Boys and Girls Club. </p>
<p>I am starting to realize how lucky we are lol</p>
<p>tlc, I should probably add that I needed my own break from CC the fall of my son’s junior year. Reading the posts was just making me anxious, and it was spilling over on to him. :)</p>
<p>tlc, we are NC residents. The school my S1 wouldn’t budge from was NC State University. At NCSU you apply directly to your major. Obviously some majors are easier to gain admittance to than others. Lots of kids go to Wake Tech and transfer to NCSU.</p>
<p>A break from CC might not be a bad idea lol … my son tells me that since I started reading this board I keep raising my expectations for his ACT score hahaha
I am really not aware of the NC schools except the little my sister mentioned last year, I am happy that MS schools LOVE their residents!! 
</p>
<p>Ole Miss and Miss State offer guaranteed admission: </p>
<p>auto-admit Mississippi resident high school students completing the college prep curriculum with any of:
- 3.20 HS GPA
- 2.50 HS GPA with 16 ACT or 770 SAT CR+M
- top 50% HS class rank with 16 ACT or 770 SAT CR+M
- 2.00 HS GPA with 18 ACT or 860 SAT CR+M</p>
<p>So like I said my son is in… with a 3.5, 25 (so far) ACT and top 20% class rank</p>
<p>I’m so glad I found this thread! In my case, I need to give my son a break from college-talk (we suffered through getting three apps in by Nov 1) but I am still obsessed. So I’m spending time on CC rather than bugging him every day. We did some college tours last spring break, he figured out his first choice, said the others would be fine, and really would rather not spend any more time thinking about it. I keep asking if he minds that I’m picking colleges for him to apply to and he says, “No Mom, you’re doing a great job.” I just wish he’d show some initiative! Can he get motivated to write any more essays if he doesn’t get into his ED school? Guess we’ll just wait and see.</p>
<p>Oh, we also live in one of those states where the flagship is hard to get into. We aren’t counting on that one, either. Luckily, he’s reasonably immune to the prestige bug and there are lots of good options out there. Just wish he would show interest in some of them Also glad I don’t have to worry about him picking a party school. He’d probably run the other way (towards the gaming nerd crowd – we all have our crosses to bear!).</p>
<p>Boys. What can one say? We took S to see some schools in Feb of jr year, and a few more in the summer. A total of 8, IIRC. He then announced that he was done looking at schools. Since all of these were in the “reach for anyone” category, this was not ideal. I could not get him to look for or consider any slam dunk safeties. He grudgingly agreed to apply to the University of Rochester as a safety. I was terrified that he was going to be the next Andison. We didn’t visit Dartmouth, but he agreed to go to an information session in Portland. When the time came, he said he didn’t want to go out that night. I think I probably had to throw a mini-tantrum to get him out of he house. Naturally, he ended up going to Dartmouth. </p>
<p>His final word on the subject? “I guess you didn’t need to make me apply to all those colleges after all.” :rolleyes:</p>
<p>At this stage, I would concentrate on ensuring that he does what he needs to do to keep his options open: apply for the summer programs, prep for the ACT, take a couple of SATIIs in June, keep his grades up. If in the end he goes to Ole Miss, that’s fine. But at least he won’t have boxed himself in. (At least he isn’t obsessed with going to a fourth rate state school because of a GF!)</p>
<p>tlcmommi4, I think you have to back off for now. He’s only a junior. I agree with those who wrote that many students don’t focus on college until the end of junior year.</p>
<p>We went through the same thing with the lunatic NYC public high school admissions process and I learned my lesson about not putting too much pressure on my kid. When she crawled into bed with me in the middle of junior year and told me she wished someone else could apply to college for her so she wouldn’t have to go through the process, the danger signs were flashing!</p>
<p>What we decided on (and I’ve seen this recommended many, many times) is that we would talk about college on a regular schedule–it worked out to every 2 weeks last year, and once a week during the summer. I had her “permission” to do research and handle the hurricane of snail mail she got once she took her first AP test as a sophomore.</p>
<p>During February vacation last year, we did a really fun trip to visit 2 schools (for her, one an extreme reach and one a target) with 3 of her friends. I was concerned that she was focussing too much on one school (a state school for us) and not really seeing the others. It was a really nice, relaxed trip (although it was 4 degrees and windy with snow flurries when we visited one of the schools, ugh!) and all the kids had a great time, including several visits to a big mall across the parking lot from the motel where we stayed.</p>
<p>Then during the summer, daughter and I did a big 1000-mile week-long trip seeing a variety of schools, half of which are on her list and one of which is her current favorite. Of course a trip in the summer is not ideal, and I would definitely want her to revisit any of these schools after acceptance, but we saw enough schools that I could be comfortable with her ruling out some of them for completely arbitrary reasons–she still has a good list.</p>
<p>Because she is having a spectacular year academically as a senior, we decided to forego early action/early decision applications. But the goal is to be completely done with applications by Thanksgiving (and the reality might be that it will take until the end of Thanksgiving weekend but I can live with that!). She has a relatively short list (7 schools; one is a waste of money since she will never get enough aid to go there even if she gets in) but I can live with that too. And there are schools on the list that do rolling admission that are safeties in every way, so she should hear pretty early.</p>
<p>I have learned to hold my tongue and let her talk when she deigns to talk to me about college. It has given her a chance to open her eyes to many more schools than the one she was fixed on as of a year ago. And of course, the words “I told you so” have disappeared from my vocabulary. But I think that’s always a good idea when raising teens.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>I don’t mean this as an insult to anyone, but it’s amazing to me that “we” say 7 applications is a relatively small number. My son was simlar to the OPs. He wanted to only apply to our in state flagship (Maryland), but I insisted he apply to a couple of others. He let me pick them, with his “veto authority.”</p>
<p>1214mom, I know what you mean! But I know so many kids with 15-20 schools on their lists!</p>
<p>Crowlady,
"I keep asking if he minds that I’m picking colleges for him to apply to and he says, “No Mom, you’re doing a great job.” I just wish he’d show some initiative! "</p>
<p>Hahaha! This is what I will have to look forward to for next year. I hope that my son stays nice enough to say that I am doing a great job ;)</p>
<p>Its funny to see different points of view on here. A few agree with me that only a year before he is halfway through his senior year is not a lot of time to get everything done that may need to be done and many others say he is only a junior leave him alone. </p>
<p>I have been through senior year twice already and I know how much there is to do and how quickly it passes by, I suppose that is the urgency I am feeling! </p>
<p>I have not mentioned college in 3 days and I am extremely proud of myself </p>
<p>Thanksgiving break will consist of a little studying for the ACT, one summer application and LOTS of relaxation and family time! Happy Thanksgiving y’all!!!</p>
<p>My mother made me apply to prestigious schools that I had little chance of getting into. I totally resented her at the time and still find it annoying now. College is a very personal decision. I really think that the more you push for something different, the more his current choice is going to be “the one”. Not sure it really is worth hurting your relationship over, right before he goes to school, because the very high likelihood he’s still going to go to “one” in the end.</p>
<p>Personally, I’d be happy if I were in your position. My S is also very smart and not very hardworking/ambitious yet. He got into our state flagship but was set upon a private, very expensive LAC. Absolutely loved this LAC. I was pretty skeptical because seriously, he did not work very hard in high school. Lo and behold, he went to the LAC and is doing so much better than he did in high school in a pretty rigorous curriculum. Now I’m glad I let him go there, but at the time, I really was feeling like he should go to the state school and find himself more at a much lower cost. </p>
<p>My conclusion from all this is that when they own the life choice, it’s truly for the best. </p>
<p>I really do relate to what you are saying because son #2 is very bright and is only interested in what I would call modestly competitive universities, and this is after we spent a boatload on a private school education, lol. I always thought he’d be the one to go to the really selective school. Oh well. I’m just rolling with it . . .</p>
<p>Good luck to both of you!!!</p>
<p>Oh reading through more of the thread, I see you are doing a great job backing off, OP. You should be proud of yourself. It’s totally NOT easy!!</p>
<p>@whoopdeedoo I am indeed fortunate that my seventeen year old appreciates his parents. We’ve built up lots of mutual trust that generally serves us well (even if stress makes us cranky in the short term). I’m enjoying reading everyone’s stories. I like the idea of “veto authority,” and it probably works well both ways. My own mother let me go to my dream school, but I chose a major that seemed more lucrative rather than what I wanted (to justify the loans and the hardship on my parents). I came home after my first semester begging to transfer to someplace cheaper where I could study my real passion. She and my grandmother convinced me to stay the course. I eventually ended up switching majors and, long story short . . . happily ever after. I know many families whose kids realized a bad fit and switched schools. Others have chosen the less expensive community college route while their kids matured. It is easy to forget in the stressful times that there are many possible paths to success.</p>