<p>That’s wonderful news, Donna. What a grand adventure for him, and for you. The empty nest for me is still a work in progress (like you, I’m beginning year three!), and I’m also a natural hermit. I’m trying to see my “new” life as a gift from my son, with whom I have a great relationship. As they spread their wings, we can spread ours–even if that means, for me, simple things like vowing to eat healthier or get out more. I hope your son enjoys his time in Vienna.</p>
1 Like
<p>I hope your son enjoys his time in Vienna. I was only there for a couple days as a tourist, but enjoyed it immensely and would recommend it.</p>
1 Like
<p>Donna,
I’m sure your son will have a great time in Vienna–please keep us posted with the news. </p>
<p>Perhaps it is too late for this–but maybe on the way back–your S should know that there is a branch of Spruenglis Schokolade in the Zurich airport. The truffes du jour (fresh chocolate truffles) are worth the ridiculous price. </p>
<p>My S is going to be a first year at UChicago this fall and I’m 3 weeks away from an empty nest. I hope he’ll do a study abroad, too–either for civ, or Spanish language.</p>
1 Like
<p>J. called me from his room in Vienna about 7:30 am, shortly after his arrival, and we talked for about half an hour. (He signed up for some system under which it actually counts as a local call. Supposedly.) Everything went very smoothly, including the change of planes in Zurich, and they didn’t even bother checking anything in customs when he got to Vienna – they just waved him through. He even managed to get a few hours of sleep on the plane.</p>
<p>He seems very content, and I’m both relieved and delighted. The international “studentheim” where he’s staying is in a decent neighborhood with a supermarket around the corner. It’s a short U-bahn (subway) ride away from the University of Vienna, where he’ll be taking his classes. His room – which is part of a suite with one other student who hasn’t arrived yet and may or may not be part of his program; two bedrooms sharing a common area, kitchen, and bathroom – is bigger than anything he’s had at the U of Chicago, and came equipped with pillows, sheets, and blankets, internet access, and even a TV. The program coordinator (an Austrian grad student) – whose name and email J. gave me, although I had to twist his arm a little to persuade him to do it! – met his taxi at the building, so he wasn’t completely on his own at the beginning. </p>
<p>He finds the building a little bit creepy right now, since it’s almost entirely empty – like the setting of a German horror film, he said. But other people should be arriving soon (mostly other international students not from his program, since only four or five others out of the 22 in the program signed up for the 4-week pre-session of intensive introductory German-language study). In the meantime, we agreed that he wouldn’t engage in any “stupid horror movie behavior.” In other words, no wandering around empty corridors or exploring the basement at night or opening doors he shouldn’t!</p>
<p>Geezermom, you’re right, this is a grand adventure for him. That’s a perfect way to describe it. And I truly believe he’s ready for it, in a way that would have been inconceivable just two years ago. I’ve certainly never done anything this exciting, either at his age or any age!</p>
<p>I’ve promised him that I’ll make an effort to get out more and eat in a more healthy and consistent way. He worries a lot about me (especially given what happened last summer), and I think that promise helped reassure him. Now all I have to do is keep it!</p>
1 Like
<p>Go tell him to go to the Hotel Sacher and get a sachertorte!</p>
1 Like
<p>Donna, I can relate to watching the flight tracker!!! Been there, done that many times. In fact, my daughter is in Zurich right now!! She always calls when she lands. That does help. This year, I got Skype so we can see each other and it’s free. It helps. She is gone a whole year this time overseas (has done it for several summers and a semester before, but this is the longest, though she’ll come home at least one time…the holidays, to visit).</p>
<p>Your son will have an amazing experience and you will relish in each call and email.</p>
1 Like
<p>Would it be possible for you to plan a trip to visit him? Flights out of US are usually very inexpensive around Thanksgiving time.</p>
<p>Make sure his internet and cell phone plans are reasonable - unlimited if he could get it. If he couldn’t get unlimited then make sure he keeps track of his usage. Our kids are used to unlimited internet, texting, but many countries do not offer that. D1 watched few Youtubes on her computer when she was in Australia, and we got hit with $250 bill. Many young people outside of US have BB because BB messaging is free with internet, but text messaging could be expensive.</p>
<p>It was rough going for D1 the first few weeks of her study abroad. But once she got adjusted, she had a great time. She can’t wait to go back to visit the place again. Likewise, your son may need sometime to adjust, so don’t get too worried if he gets homesick.</p>
1 Like
<p>Donna, I just read the letters you posted earlier. Thank you so much for doing so…your mother was clearly an extraordinary girl and woman. A fascinating and moving story.</p>
<p>I, too, recommend Skype. Before S left for Paris I told him that I was expecting more communication–at least an email every two weeks saying “everything’s fine”–than we normally would get when he’s in the US. Naturally, he completely ignored this. (He must have read the “smile and nod” thread. 
) My H was so anxious that he called him his first night, since he had to stay in a hostel rather than with his host family. The hostel management told H he had arrived safe and sound…:)</p>
1 Like
<p>Donna,</p>
<p>When my D was in Vienna last year she found that the 6 students who did the Chicago pre-program became very close. They also made friends with a lot of the European and Asian students taking the same German classes at the U. Are the students housed in the same residence as last year? It sounds like they might be a bit closer this year. My D had to take the u-bahn to a trolley to get to campus. They were out by the amusement park (I can’t remember the name of the neighborhood). He will have an amazing experience. If you can find the time to get over there, it was a great experience for us to see her in that environment. As for communication, we used Skype. She had a cell phone with both an Austrian sim card (she bought it there) and an international sim card, but we mostly used the computer. She’s in Israel now on Birthright. What a difference a year makes!</p>
1 Like
<p>
</p>
<p>OK, OK, it’s a pleasant interlude in Vienna, not exactly David Livingstone exploring Africa!</p>
<p>^^^
I haven’t the slightest idea who you are, but why do you find it necessary to come on this thread and be that snide and dismissive, and make fun of the pleasure I’m obviously taking in my son’s experience? (I don’t care if you say you weren’t being serious; it certainly doesn’t come across that way.) For you, maybe spending three months in another country at the age of 20 – a country where you don’t yet speak the language at all – is something that happens every day and twice on Sundays. I’m happy that your life is so exciting. Mazel tov. For him, it is a grand adventure. As for me, my statement that it’s more exciting than anything I’ve ever done was sincere. And I’ve done at least one thing that some people seem to consider at least as exotic as David Livingstone exploring Africa.</p>
1 Like
<p>As it should be, Donna. Four months to explore, learn and grow. It is indeed a grand adventure.</p>
1 Like
<p>Annudahmom wrote: “Germans and Austrians just LOVE to stop your life to lecture you about your failings.” Coming from a German family, I don’t think this is just because you are American! They do it to each other too.</p>
<p>Now that I’ve calmed down from being annoyed by Mr. ■■■■■, I can thank everyone else for understanding how I feel. (I very much doubt he’s a parent!)</p>
<p>And thanks, Consolation. I still find it hard to believe that my mother was only 15 years old when she wrote those early letters. I was 20 when she died, so I wasn’t a child, but she was still primarily “Mom” to me, and one of the many things that still makes me feel so sad about her early death (three years younger than I am now) is that we never had the opportunity to have a more adult relationship. </p>
<p>At least these letters have given me more insight into how she looked at things, long before she was a Mom, and have given my son at least some idea of what she was like – at least when she was young; there are several references in her letters to her disliking children, and never wanting to have any! Obviously she changed her thinking about that, and I know that she wanted grandchildren someday, more than anything. I’m sorry she never had the chance to get to know my son; I think she would have loved him very much and been very proud of him. And he would have loved her.</p>
<p>And the letters have also reminded me of how academically brilliant she was. I think when I was a child, she was overshadowed a little by my father in that respect, in my mind – after all, he was a lawyer, who had been on law review at Columbia and, as a senior in high school, had gotten the second highest score on the Regents exams in the entire State of New York, while she never practiced law and was “just” an elementary school teacher. But I shouldn’t have let her take a back seat to him; she was truly every bit as bright as he was, and I don’t think I was completely aware back then of all the societal reasons why a female Jewish immigrant like her didn’t, and really couldn’t, pursue a career in the law in 1948 in the same way my father did. I know that when she was in England she passed whatever exams were necessary for her to go to Oxford, but she wasn’t able to do that for a number of reasons. And I’ve gotten in touch over the years with a couple of elderly women who were classmates of hers at the Goldschmidt School in Berlin (where she went after all Jewish children were expelled from the public schools), and they specifically remembered her as being the smartest girl in their class! And I don’t think they were just saying that to make me feel good.</p>
1 Like
<p>I downloaded skype at my office and we tried it today. At first it was OK, but then there was so much static we could barely hear each other. I hope it isn’t always like that.</p>
<p>All is well so far. Runnersmom, maybe the residence is different from last year’s, because he said it’s only an 8-minute subway ride to the campus, with walks of a minute or two on each end.</p>
<p>He has the suite to himself for a month, because his suitemate doesn’t arrive until the regular session begins at the end of September. The Internet is free through the ethernet connection in his room, and there’s cable TV which gets the BBC. A pretty good deal, I think.</p>
<p>Perhaps also fortunately, someone comes to clean the kitchen and bathroom once a week!</p>
<p>He’s met the 6 other U. of C. students in the pre-session; only three Americans, interestingly enough (the others are from France, Brazil, and Singapore). I didn’t realize that it’s so common for international students to come to the U.S. and then study abroad for a term.</p>
<p>Most cool of all, his room is directly across the street from the ferris wheel from the old Orson Welles movie “The Third Man.” Still there, and still operating as part of a carnival. So if he ever gets bored, there’s something right nearby for him to do!</p>
<p>I admit that I’m somewhat envious. Studying abroad for a term, or a year, wasn’t something I ever considered for a moment when I was in college. I simply wasn’t that adventurous.</p>
1 Like
<p>Sounds like the same residence, take a right at the pig! Ask him, I know he’ll understand.</p>
1 Like
<p>Do you mean the ferris wheel at the Prater? Oh what fun!</p>
1 Like
<p>That’s the one! It’s a really interesting neighborhood, and my D loved living there.</p>
1 Like
<p>Great thread. DonnaL, please post more updates. And thanks for sharing your story. My own mother lived through WW2 in Poland and had very similar attitudes toward Germany, and German, as your mother did. She actually grew up in a bi-lingual household and spoke fluent German as a child. Her family respected German culture, music and literature. All that changed overnight in 1939. German became first a language of fear, then a language of death. Decades later if she suddenly heard German she’d instantly tense up and literally shudder with fear. In the 70s she went once to Germany to visit a relative and hated it because every male over certain age looked like the SS to her. She relearned German as an adult because it was useful in her career and now speaks it nearly fluently. And while her feelings toward anything German have somewhat mellowed, to this day she harbors deep suspicion and resentment toward a culture that really was very much a part of her childhood. Some wounds don’t heal.</p>
1 Like
<p>DonnaL - my S will leave in a couple of weeks for the same uChicago program your son is taking. He leaves on Sept. 22.</p>
1 Like