Depends on the school.
Depends entirely on the school.
My younger son loved being an “only” . . .and definitely wasn’t all that enthusiastic when his brother returned home for breaks. Not all siblings struggle. Ironically, they will be attending the same college next year.
Move-in is in August after DD has started high school herself. Welcome week occurs between move in and the first day of class. Families are only included in events for roughly 24 hours at move in. DD cannot attend due to her ECs.
Family weekend in October also conflicts with her ECs.
DD is not expecting to interact with her brother at summer orientation. She just wants to see the place. Given the distance from home, we will not be making a special trip.
I appreciate the suggestions and stories about adjustment. The timing of her visit to campus is not really what I was hoping to discuss.
We’ve started talking to both boys about when my oldest will be returning home during the semester in preparation for the transition to only child. Initially, my younger son seemed to think that because my son would be attending an instate school that he would be coming home more often than he actually will be. Once we started talking specific dates , I think my younger son started to realize that there will be a bigger change than he thought . I don’t have any daughters so I can’t speak to a brother /sister dynamic. Will they have a chance to do some things together before he leaves?
Yes, we are going on a family vacation and we are maintaining most of our past family routine until he leaves. Great idea to discuss trips home. I will make sure to discuss how their school calendars overlap. I have looked at that but I am sure no one else has, including DH.
All of my boys (and all of my sisters in my family of origin) have been interested in seeing each others’ haunts. I couldn’t reasonably take my youngest on the big college visit, but my middle came (age twelve) and LOVED it. Youngest still wishes, he thinks, that he’d gone.
Eta: it’s possible my family is just extremely nosey about each other. My father requested, and was joyfully given, a tour of DH’s lab just this weekend, and many family members have visited where I teach.
Our middle kid struggled a lot when her older sister left for college. They are very close and it was just hard. We sent her out for a visit fall of the older one’s second year. That helped. It wasn’t as soon as they would have liked, but D2’s junior year was so crazy busy we couldn’t find a way to make it happen sooner. Now she is heading to college too and just younger brother will be at home. We’ve teased about him being the focus of our attention (love that long table idea, @dfbdfb ) but also pointed out that tickets for traveling Broadway shows and baseball games are cheaper with just one kid than three, and how he might get taken out to meals more often–it’s not all bad being the youngest—always getting the front seat of the car, choosing the radio station, etc. We have also planned to send him out to Chicago to visit his oldest sister over fall break. they are both wildly excited over that. Our kids are close, and for them and us, seeing the family they’ve grown up in change is hard, even though it’s a good kind of change.
DD is not going after all. I think she just needed to know that it was a possibility. She will go some other time freshman year.