<p>My son went into college w 67 credits. He was technically a junior but really a freshman in age. It was a CC high school program. He has a loan that he wont have to pay back as long as he keeps a B.
His second semester he crashed hard over a break up and tried to commit suicide. (He's doing much better now). He took 2 INCOMPLETES (the third incomplete the professor said orally that he could have an I but my son misunderstood how to follow up and received an F)!
I realize he should've withdrawn all 5 but we believed him when he said he could do it. He got 2Cs in the other 2 classes which also surprised him, so his average is low. If he can get a 3.7 on his remaining classes that he finishes as well as all classes his senior year he will have a 3.0 and won't have to repay the loan. More importantly, if he doesn't will he even have a prayer at a masters degree at Texas Tech in their Professional Writing program that he wants?
Also, he will have to retake the class I guess since it's required for his degree.
Will this erase the F if it's averaged with his new grade? I know I should ask advising but it's really difficult to get any answers</p>
<p>INRANGE, without knowing the details of your son’s suicide attempt, I’m more concerned about his mental health than his grades. Lots of students break up without crashing the way your son did. Is there something else going on? Is he getting the mental health support he needs? Should he be taking some time off to deal with his mental health? Since he is so young, even if he took a year off he’d still be a young senior.</p>
<p>But as to his grades, it’s optimistic to think your son will get a 3.7 average for the rest of his classes. He <em>could</em> do that, but if he didn’t get a 3.7 average in his first semester, before the breakup, it’s unlikely he will do it next year.</p>
<p>You might have to make the journey and speak personally with the college deans and staff to get the best resolution of all of this. I did this when my son had a number of issues in college. Yes, it took time and money, but I got it resolved and the options pretty much outlined. I then just forgot about the whole thing and focused on helping son get back on track. He had not crashed to the point of your son, but was clearly not able and willing to complete his schoolwork for a number of reasons at that time. It took several years for him to resume his college track, not just a year or two or three, and so many if not most or all of the options were obsolete anyways. It would have been just as easy to just have left everything go and pick up the best we could years later, in retrospect, but it made ME feel better to have it all out there and know what was what.</p>
<p>I think more advocacy should be done, with a dean or advisor or whomever, to try to get these grades wiped off the record, and the advocacy should preferably involve you as well as your son (is he 18 yet?). Clearly he was not really up to self-advocacy and was not able to be realistic about what he could accomplish, and consulting with a mental health professional at the school might help correct some of the mistakes that were made, such as not withdrawing but expecting himself to do well on the incompletes…</p>
<p>Does he have a diagnosis of depression? Was he hospitalized? is he on meds and adjusting to them? Is he registered with a disabilities office? These things should be discussed with the school. Maybe he should have taken a medical leave and just forfeited the course credits (and his record would still be okay). I’m surprised the college didn’t require this.</p>
<p>You could also consult legal help.</p>
<p>Moving forward, mental and emotional health is the top priority, as the other poster said. And taking a year or even two off is not counterproductive for many, and might help him gain an even keel.</p>
<p>But if it were me, I would try to ensure a relatively clean slate for him to return to at some point. I know many students in this situation and the school has done that for them.</p>
<p>I didn’t want to write a novel but yes he suffers from depression and ADHD. He found the disability services to be unhelpful to him since his struggles don’t involve needing more time testing. He is just scattered and struggles with organization.
Obviously he can do it since he has so many credits. He was hospitalized and is responding to meds but was already seeing a psychiatrist for 3 years now. He is doing counseling and we are very hopeful.
If advocacy doesn’t work, can he retake the class? Can a person get in a masters program with a 3.0?</p>
<p>His gpa was 3.5 with 4 classes the first semester so we thought he would do no more than 4 classes at a time from now on.</p>
<p>advocacy will work. If you get the doctor involved, it will be a quick fix.</p>
<p>How do we go about it? What is our case? Should we do it for the semester or just the cs
and f?</p>
<p>I think you should definitely persist in advocating for him with the college to repair what you can for the semester so when he is prepared to return the damage is as minimal as it can be, but don’t send him back unless he’s emotionally stable. You say he’s “young” anyway so it’s not a race to the finish. Make sure he understands this, too. Repaying the loan is the least of his issues. I’m sure his doctors can advise.</p>
<p>He is 19 so I assumed they wouldn’t listen to me. I was under the impression no one would be able to help me this summer, that we’d have to wait till fall.
the dr will be able to verify the illness etc but the professor replied this to myson when asked about the grade (not receiving an incomplete) “I replied to your e-mail a couple of hours ago, but I’m not sure that it “went.”* So if this is repetitious, I apologize.* When you spoke to me in class about your hospitalization, I indicated I could assign you an Incomplete so that you would have adequate time to complete your research paper.* You never got back with me to set up due dates, conditions, etc.* Then I got blind-sided when you did not appear and take the final exam.* University guidelines state that the majority of a student’s coursework must be completed in order to assign an Incomplete – that is, a student should have only a relatively small amount of work left to complete for the removal of the “I”* Unfortunately, you have only completed 350 out of 1000 possible points in the course (approx. 1/3 of the course work).* I could have justified giving you an “I” had you missed EITHER the paper (300/1000 points)* OR the final exam (250/1000 points), but NOT BOTH (especially since I wasn’t kept in the loop about your possible input for the paper submission or about you missing the final exam.* Final grades were due Tuesday at noon, and when I had not heard from you regarding any of the missing assignments, I was obligated to assign you the “F.”* Always make it a point to let your professors know what is happening, any extenuating circumstances that might arise, etc.* so that possible plans/arrangements can be make in a timely manner.”</p>
<p>Definitely see if you can get a retroactive medical withdrawal. A suicide attempt and resulting hospitalization is definitely an extenuating circumstance and probably limited your S’s ability to contact his professors immediately.</p>
<p>Hugs to you and your S.</p>
<p>Then reply #2 "As you can see, the procedure for cancelling an “F” and giving an “I” is problematic and difficult.* I will contact The College of Liberal and Fine Arts next week and tell them of your situation and give them cc’s of our correspondence.* If the College indicates that your “F” can be changed to an “I,” I am willing to do so, reluctantly.* We can then meet and come up with a plan for completion of the missing assignments that fits my summer schedule (I am not teaching this summer).<em>It is not the responsibility of instructors to</em>hover over the shoulder of adult students to make sure that they<em>complete course assignments correctly</em>and within the prescribed time frame; ultimately, adult students<em>must take responsibility</em>for knowing what they must do to* successfully fulfill the course requirements…<strong><em>Not showing up for the final exam</em>and not telling the instructor because the student thought he already had an Incomplete and could simply tack on one more major assignment that he could* take care of accordingly at a later date is a new one on me.* And I have been a university teacher for over thirty years.</strong>I will, however, check with COLFA early next week and let you know the results.</p>
<p>Reply #3
final answer from the instructor.
"I checked on the proper procedures for dealing with your request for changing the “F” to an “I”:* the first step is to check with the English Department to verify the interpretation of the COLFA/Departmental academic policies.* After sharing<em>our e-mail conversations</em>with the department – i.e., that you have completed only 35% of the course requirements,* that you didn’t follow up to actually arrange to complete and submit your course paper to remove an “I” by an agreed upon deadline, that you failed to take the final exam without informing me ahead of time that you would not/would not do so, that you contacted me only three days after grades were required to be submitted to the university, etc.-- I have concluded that your “F” grade will stand.* If you wish to take your<em>situation to the next level you will need to contact</em>the English Department Chair, Prof. ___<strong><em>* Prof. </em></strong>
will return to her office the first week in June.* I am sending her a copy of this e-mail, along with the other e-mails you and I have exchanged.</p>
<p>So sorry for such long posts but he obviously is not going to budge. If we can do the medical withdrawal, I’d certainly rather do that.
I don’t see how they would allow it now though. He is taking an internship class at home, in our town, I don’t know if it would jeopardize it.
It seems this prof thinks my son is of sound mind and is manipulating the system. The amount of pills he swallowed show clearly otherwise. We are also still in a state of shock even though it’s been a month and are obviously not on top of our game either which really makes me appreciate all the advice.</p>
<p>To request a retroactive medical withdrawal, or a similar solution, I would think you should contact the Dean of Students.</p>
<p>Inrange -</p>
<p>First off, my best wishes for your son and his recovery.</p>
<p>Second, the teacher can’t budge. College policies are designed for the average student and are supposed to be fair; they are laid out and students are supposed to follow them. IF your son was unable due to his emotional state to communicate with the teacher, there is nothing the teacher can do about it. He has to follow the rules. It sounds like the teacher did the best he could and has now referred you up the ladder. This next person might be able to help you or may send you up the food chain. I would make sure to have a current letter from the shrink to provide to these people.</p>
<p>Good luck…</p>
<p>Inrange; I am very sorry about your situation with your son. I haven’t completely read all of the posts but I don’t think I saw of any mention of a “forgiveness rule.” Have you checked with your son’s college to see if they have one? My freshman DS decided to major in “fraternity” his second quarter and came home with a wonderful 1.5. Fortunately his college allows a up to 3 classes freshman year to be repeated under the forgiveness rule. My DS is doing so and getting much higher grades which will be substituted in for his D+ grades. </p>
<p>Secondly I would definitely appeal the grade by that professor. Since your son clearly was suffering mentally how could they expect him to act in a sound fashion and follow-through on the other requirements. I would bring as much medical info with you including a letter from the doctor saying son did not have capability to function in a normal manner. </p>
<p>Finally don’t worry about the Masters Program now. It is a long time away and your son could change his mind. Plus I believe schools realize that a lot of maturing takes place over the course of the 4 years. More importantly is for your son to focus on his mental health and get better in that regards. Perhaps going to college adds too much pressure and he may need some time off.</p>
<p>“Definitely see if you can get a retroactive medical withdrawal. A suicide attempt and resulting hospitalization is definitely an extenuating circumstance and probably limited your S’s ability to contact his professors immediately.” - that is the way to go. You may want to get a Power of Attorney to help with your discourse with the college.</p>
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<p>I could (easily) be wrong, but getting a POA strikes me as unnecessarily complicated. If at any point the college personnel tell you that they need permission from your son to discuss his situation, just ask them to email or fax you a form that your son could sign authorizing any disclosures and discussion. Don’t most colleges have such a form? </p>
<p>Or – is this what you meant by Power of Attorney, glido?</p>
<p>Sorry, but I think you have to reassess your priorities. Who cares if the internship is messed up? Who cares if a 3.0 GPA is enough for grad school admissions? Your son was on medication and seeing a psychiatrist for 3 years, and still made an impulsive gesture and tried to commit suicide. He is ‘better now’ because no one broke up with him yesterday… </p>
<p>Is he as concerned about the grades as you are? What is he concerned about at this point? What measures are going to be in place at this school so that he doesn’t get disorganized and overwhelmed and do something the next time something bad happens to him? Can you find him an ADHD Coach either through the school or privately to help him learn to organize himself. </p>
<p>The person you should be talking with and getting permission to talk with is his psychiatrist, or his therapist. As for the school portion, I am sure there are higher ups who are in a position to wipe the slate… but you cannot so quickly wipe the slate on the mental health significance of his depression and suicidality. </p>
<p>I am sure there is more to this than is appropriate for you to share in this forum, which is of course fine. It is shock and a feeling of lack of control when adolescents do these kinds of things… it is natural to want to ‘take care of business’, but please don’t lose the forest for the trees.</p>