<p>Lookie:</p>
<p>We need to start with what Stanford and Swarthmore are. Stanford is a research university -- think of a company with many divisions. One division is the undergrad school (teaching 4-year college students). Other divisions teach grad students. Others teach professional students (law school). And, one of the largest divisions is the research division -- the school contracts with governments and corporations to do research projects. You are only concerned with the first division -- the undergrad teaching -- as resources invested in the other divisions have no benefit to the four year college students. In fact, those divisions divert attention from four-year students -- professors split their time between their research jobs and their teaching, between grad students and undergrads, etc. Among research universities, Stanford is one of the best in the United States.</p>
<p>Swarthmore is a much smaller business. It only has ONE division -- undergrad 4-year students. Virtually every dollar they spend is spent on undergrad students. The professors are hired and evaluated based on teaching 4-year students. Grad school students do not teach because there aren't any. Swarthmore is one of the top undergrad only schools in the United States.</p>
<p>Because of its size, Stanford is better known among the general population -- just in the same way that a large corporation with many divisions is better known than a smaller company that builds ultra-premium products in just one category. So, by your parents' thinking on "prestige" (i.e. brand-name recognition), Stanford is clearly the choice. Within the academic community (i.e. grad schools, professors, people who really know education), I would say they are about the same. Swarthmore is perceived by those who know as being perhaps the best, most rigorous undergrad educations in the country.</p>
<p>Although what the two schools teach is similar, the style of education is very different. At Swarthmore, there are only 1500 students. Classes are very small. You will know your professors by their first names, and vice versa. Stanford has 6500 undergrads, plus all of the grad students, so it is a much larger experience. Larger classes, larger campus. More options, but less personalized and more of the red-tape that you get with any large corporation. Think of the difference between shopping at a small boutique store and shopping at a large department store. </p>
<p>Swarthmore tends to be very "academic" in focus. Perhaps because of the close contact with professors and opportunities for undergrad research, Swarthmore produces a very large percentage of future PhDs. 21% of all its graduates went on to get PhDs in the most recent 10 year period -- the third highest percentage in the United States behind two tech schools (CalTech and Harvey Mudd). Stanford is also high on that list -- #19 in the the country with 11% of its grads going on to get PhDs (Amherst is #18).</p>
<p>On average, Swarthmore is probably more intense, rigorous, and challenging academically. It has always attracted students who enjoy being challenged in the classroom, so it's developed into a particular quality of the school.</p>
<p>Both have a beautiful campus. Both are convenient to major cities -- although Swarthmore is more convenient for students without cars, since it has a train station right on campus. Stanford is convenient to San Francisco. Swarthmore is convenient to Philadelphia (20 minutes) and New York City (2 hours). Stanford has milder weather. Swarthmore's climate is fairly moderate, but you will get four definite seasons and a couple of snowstorms in winter. There are cultural differences between the west coast and the east coast of the US, but they are probably too complex to easily explain.</p>
<p>Both have signficant international enrollment and a lot of diversity on campus, so I think you would be comfortable at either school. It will probably be a little easier to make friends and find a comfortable group at the smaller school. Stanford is large enough that it's a bit like finding friends in a big city. Both have huge (and nearly identical) per student endowments. They are among the wealthiest schools in the country in terms of resources.</p>
<p>They are both superb choices, so either way you choose, you win. I would, personally, choose either Stanford or Swarthmore over your other two options -- Dartmouth or Berkeley.</p>
<p>Big picture? Swarthmore provides the more focused undergrad education (many students go to Swarthmore for undergrad and then Stanford for grad school). Stanford has more brand-name recognition, which is often the deciding factor for international students. Take your pick.</p>
<p>I would personally choose Swarthmore over Stanford for the quality of the undergrad education and the unusual sense of community on campus. But, that's a personal preference and I certainly wouldn't say that somebody else couldn't make the opposite choice. Many students who attend Swarthmore chose it over Stanford and, obviously, many students who attend Stanford chose it over Swarthmore. I would guess that most people who get into both choose Stanford based on brand-name recognition.</p>