The MOB/MOG Dress Extravaganza!

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I’ve been following this thread closely. Add me to the MOB dress list needing help!

Venue = Summer, wooded park with shelter, near water. Informal, picnic-style afternoon & dinner, evening dancing. Bride wants slightly more elegant dress for all, so I need to find a cross between evening wear, and picnic wear!

We fly in – Airtags to be ordered!

I’ll likely never wear this dress again, so cost is an issue. I rarely wear dresses at all. The rare times I attend eveningwear events, I wear a long black skirt, and alternate fancy tops.

Wish list:
• Little if any bling. Preferably no lace to rip or snag. Bride’s dress is simple and elegant (long with a train).
• Prints or florals ok but subtle preferred.
• Comfortable & wrinkle-resistant for full day/night (no opportunity to change clothes).
• Long preferred. Breezes will likely be an issue. (Bride not keen on dressy pants).
• Large hips, small top & high waisted. I miss the shoulder pad phase😉. A-Line usually works. Preferably no “shape-wear” needed.
• Scoop neck usually best (no low-cut “V”). Crossed front ok. Sun-damaged back.
• Short sleeves preferred (lightweight for summer). Or cover-up w/ a halter.
• This venue would be hazardous in ANY heal. So many of the gorgeous dresses shown on models are paired with elegant heels. Also unlikely to ever wear “fancy” shoes again, so hoping to find something light beige to match skin-tone, that “blends into the background”, some support (not fully flat), possibly ankle strap,
• Bride does not want to select a color theme. Flowers will be simple and neutral. Bride’s only request was no jewel tones, or bright saturated colors. Naturally, that’s all I normally wear (besides black and grey). Single bridesmaid will wear an existing dress: either a very light green or a rosy/bronze/coral – and I won’t know which until too late. What colors complement? Teal? Darker beige? Navy ok? Will not know MOG selection, until wedding day.

Impossible? Fortunately, we live near Nordstroms (and Rack), Macy’s, Dillards, TJMaxx and more, for easy returns!

Some options that caught my eye posted below. None quite work yet, but appreciate feedback and other resources.

A. This comes in many colors at other stores (and a more subtle print)! Good pricing, but no JCPenneys nearby for returns. https://www.jcpenney.com/p/r-m-richards-sleeveless-evening-gown/ppr5008310468? Would need a cover-up.

B. I liked this style, but reviews were mixed, and over my budget. Adrianna Papell Boat Neck Short Elbow Sleeve Floral Embroidery Crepe Satin Gown | Dillard’s (dillards.com)

C. Too dressy for a picnic, (and no metallic) but nice style if I could find something similar in a less formal fabric. https://www.nordstrom.com/s/adrianna-papell-metallic-mesh-drape-a-line-gown/6109090?

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@BunsenBurner
I saw both those dresses and liked them. The reason I didn’t add the shorter dress is because in Petites, it only comes in wine, which I love, but doesn’t strike me as a color for a summer garden wedding.

The longer dress, so pretty, I thought of suggesting, but then saw that Colorado_Mom had nixed a pale yellow dress due to her coloring and thought this was also kinda pale.

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@kjofkw Might you look through the links I posted earlier today for Colorado_Mom because several of those were long and might be OK for a more picnic-y style wedding?

For example, this one in pink or green:
https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/the-somerset-maxi-dress-cutwork-edition2?category=beach-wedding-guest-dresses&color=066&type=STANDARD&quantity=1

This one might coordinate with the bridesmaid:

Or perhaps this one?:

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I JUST bought this dress at Nordstrom Rack. Think it would meet most of your criteria.

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I have to go find the tag to see the brand though. Material is very light and breathes.

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For @kjofkw

What about this in pink or green?:
https://www.bodenusa.com/en-us/trim-detail-maxi-dress-deep-forest/sty-d0661-mos?cat=C1_S2_G4

https://www.nordstrom.com/s/floral-halter-neck-chiffon-maxi-dress/6872506?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FDresses%2FWedding%20Guest%20DNU&color=684

https://www.nordstrom.com/s/eliza-j-floral-illusion-neck-ballgown/5589734?origin=coordinating-5589734-0-5-PDP_2.SEEDED_SUB_1-recbot-frequently_bought_together&recs_placement=PDP_2.SEEDED_SUB-1&recs_strategy=frequently_bought_together&recs_source=recbot&recs_page_type=product&recs_seed=6872506&color=IVORY%20MULTI

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@soozievt i love your search abilities and your style choices.

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You oughta see my college search abilities, LOL!

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Excited to have @kjofkw join the hunt. Lots of nice new links today :wink:

I have this new contender from a local dress shop, where I didn’t expect to find anything. For now I’m avoiding blue, but the longish length had some appeal (with different shoes of course).

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More for Colorado-Mom garden wedding:

https://www.adriannapapell.com/collections/garden-wedding-guest-dresses/products/floral-foiled-metallic-mesh-twist-front-long-mermaid-gown-with-flutter-sleeves-in-mint-multi-ap1e210368

https://www.adriannapapell.com/collections/garden-wedding-guest-dresses/products/crepe-front-tie-midi-length-sheath-dress-in-blue-mist-ap1d104792

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oops

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I think it looks great! If the other mom’s dress is navy, the color will be different enough!

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I like this one best so far but I think you might try it one size down. You have a great figure and I think you could find something a bit more special.

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I agree that if you really love blue (it sure does look like a good color for you) maybe at least approach the bride saying you are looking at a couple of blue dresses - not the same blue as MOB- and see what she thinks?

I don’t always get why MOB and MOG can’t have a color in the same family. If it’s not the same dress, doesn’t similar colors (maybe a navy and a medium blue) HELP coordinate photos and such?!

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Agree. They are different shades of blue, assuming the MOB is wearing navy). I can understand though, why the bride wouldn’t want them both in navy.

My D’s friend got married several years ago and battled her mother-in-law over dress colors (I think the MOB was wearing navy and the bride wanted the MOG in a certain color for picture purposes). It escalated quite a bit during the planning stages and the MOG finally ended up, without the bride’s approval, wearing a (gorgeous) bright Fushia-pink gown. It was definitely a strong message to the bride and overshadowed the MOB’s dress quite a bit. In response, the bride limited the number of pictures MOG was in - other than the groom’s family pics.

As one can imagine, their relationship hasn’t evolved much from there.

615

Wowser!!!

I may be in the minority also with this but I have no clue or understanding why the MOB is more “important” than the MOG in this dress process - I don’t care who is footing the bill for the wedding. $$$ doesn’t buy you clout or priority, it’s a unity not a “next in line” event! . MOST important is the bride AND the groom! - not one of them over the other either.

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616

Sounds like the bride and the MOG are very strong minded people.

I’m sure their relationship is more than the color of the dress.

As a person who’s MIL is very strong minded, I’ve learned over these close to 40 years being her dil that I have to compromise because in the end my husband loves his mom. Strong opinions or not. I choose to have a good relationship with her. And ignore those things that drive me insane.

And I’m happy that my dil didn’t dictate the color of my dress.

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For clarity, not singling out any one person here about MOB/MOG dresses. I’m just talking this tradition in general that is wacky to me! :slight_smile:

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@abasket - I think that traditionally, the MOB has been perceived as having first dibs on dress color because historically the bride’s family footed the bulk of the bill for the wedding ceremony. I once asked a MOG friend if she were wearing beige and keeping her mouth shut, and her reply was, “You don’t have to do that if you pay for half.” So, rightly or wrongly, I do think there is some connection to the proverbial power of the purse and, “control.”

However, times have changed. Marriage typically occurs at a much older age and brides and grooms often foot the majority of the wedding ceremony and reception bills themselves. Or parents of the B&G share costs or contribute in equal amounts to the wedding costs. So, I do agree with you that some of the more old-fashioned dressing rules have not kept up with the changes in other aspects of weddings.

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D1 already told her future MIL that if she finds a dress she loves to get it and to not worry about me choosing a dress or a color first. I am the one that told D1 to do this since it really doesn’t matter to me and I love D1’s future MIL!

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As the saying goes, you only have one mother but can have several wives.