Too attached, and too young?!!

<p>I've always had trouble seeing relationships and how so many marriages and bonds are fake, and so I always pursued the logical option of waiting, seeing as I'm only 15. This summer, I was on a program in Israel with people from New York (with me), France, and Israel, working together as counselors for half the day, and touring the land and spending time the other half. Upon meeting one particular French girl, I became very close, and the two of us became quite linked over the course of 2 and a half weeks. Albeit we're both quite young, I realized that this is the most ideal relationship. She's moderately pretty, but her personality is so unique, and leaving her yesterday has taken a toll I couldn't fathom previous to the leave. I know I'm young, and it's quite awkward to say this, but looking around me, I feel like this is the person I want to spend my life with. Naturally, everyone would assume I'm merely in love, but I am. And when I look around, every girl I see, even the stunning ones, are in black-and-white. They're all 2-D, superficial to me. I don't know what to do. To be honest, it seems like all the odds are against us. We're both remaining in Israel this month, so we might meet up, but our families are in two seperate places and each has their own agenda. I can't explain the feeling I have, but it's like an empty pit, or void, that just pulls me and tears me. I've had about 3 or 4 girlfriends before, and I understand how love works; this is certainly not heartbreak, or heartache. It is not a desire, since I'm not merely sexually attracted to her. Help, please! I don't know what to do, and have nobody to talk to! I just cry, and I'm generally a tough, logical person. I can't hold it back, and she's perpetually in my mind. I usually worry about my future often, and plan things, and integrating her into my future is a very pragmatic goal, but it seems like it will inevitable fail. I don't want to end up being with someone who's not like that. And she really is the one. I just love her soul, and her, not even her body or anything sexual. I can't explain the feeling! Seeing a beautiful girl in a bikini disgusts me further. I just .....</p>

<p>I know exactly what you mean! Whatever it takes, do your best to meet her again. You HAVE to give it a try or you’ll have those “What if” moments all your life.</p>

<p>P.S. I’m proud to say that I have experienced similar story and I’m now enjoying it’s happy ending (well, technically that’s not an ending at all)</p>

<p>JT, sounds like you are in love (REALLY in love) for the first time. As you can see from my screenname, I am a parent, but I definitely believe 15 year olds can fall in love. Hopefully you can see her again this month, ask your parents if your families can get together and do something.</p>

<p>The reality is, though, that you are probably not going to be able to see much of her in person for the next several years. Maybe you can go on another summer program together or something. As I’m sure you have already done, get linked up on Facebook, and use something like Skype for face to face chats.</p>

<p>It is possible that your romance won’t last due to the distance. You both will be meeting a lot of other people over the next several years. And the reality is, with 6 billion people on the planet, there are a lot of very cool and interesting people you both will encounter. I’d work really hard to continue to build the friendship side of your relationship. You can’t really lose by doing that. You either end up with a life partner (if you really do end up together someday) who is also a dear friend, or if you don’t end up together romantically, you can still end up with a wonderful friend for life.</p>

<p>I would take it “one encounter” at a time. Don’t start planning your whole life with her yet, that doesn’t really make sense. But see if you can see her again this month. Get linked up online and keep in touch. If she wants to, see if you can go to another summer program together.</p>

<p>@intparent Thank you so much for hearing me out! I truly appreciate having an adult give me their honest advice, and not cast me away due to the rapid generalizations which hit their mind upon hearing my age. Is it okay for me to simply wait for her? I know it will certainly be hard, but I usually won’t go for girls in my community, and this relationship has, “raised awareness of a true standard”, if you will. Anyway thanks so much!</p>

<p>I agree with intparent. Focus on building friendship with her when you see her. Friendships last so much longer than romantic relationships. Take it from me- I’ve fallen in love with Israeli guys when I studied in Israel :slight_smile: Those who I’ve kissed are no longer in my mind (except this moment) but moments with those who I’ve laughed, flirted, and shared fun with are still among my top memories of Israel. You want to remember her forever, don’t you?</p>

<p>You can always consider doing another summer program together or do a program in France. In the meantime, keep in touch via Facebook and Skype!</p>

<p>JT, I would say it is okay to wait for her, but… keep an open mind. Be open to the experiences and people that life introduces you to in the next several years. If it is meant to be, then it will work out. Keep in touch, build that foundation of friendship, and see where it goes. If I were you, I would not push her for any kind of an exclusive relationship unless you can live in the same city for an extended period of time. That probably means in college or post-college. I know that is a long time away. I guess I would say, don’t miss out too much on the life going on around you and the people around you while focusing on someone who is far away.</p>

<p>You didn’t really say in your first post, but do you know how she feels about you?</p>