<p>Please realize that you are not alone and that Senior year can feel endless especially for those who have worked so hard for so long. I recommend that you take the advice of the poster that suggested you take it a day at a time or 15 minutes at a time. I also recommend that you reach out to people and let them know what is going on in your life. Oftentimes teachers have no idea about the deep suffering of some of their students because these very same students seem so capable. If you can, take a risk and ask for help. I think that you will be surprised by how much people want to help you if you are open. By the way, college WILL definitely be much better than high school, so hang in there!</p>
<p>dukeletter-
Congratulations on your accomplishments! You have much to be thankful for - God is at work in your life because he has bigger plans for your life! Please seek the counsel of a pastor in your area. But really, you need look no further for guidance, than the Direct access you have through Jesus Christ. Think of the blessings you have been given already - preservation from danger, your health, liberty, the ability to see, hear, speak, think, and imagine - all this comes from the hand of God. Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28<br>
God bless you</p>
<p>wow i know how you feel. my parents are absolutely horrible, I don't want to spend any time at home and then when I am i cannot concentrate. getting through school now is really tough. and im torn between going to my dream schools (if i get in) and going where I get a free ride because I dont want any involvement with them after I graduate.</p>
<p>hmm i often get a trash bag and fill it it with stuff from my room that i dont really need anymore (or clothes to donate) when it gets too hard to concentrate... kind of like preparing to clean out when I go away for good. hang in there, and try to have some fun in the meantime!</p>
<p>You sound awesome! You have come this far, do not give up now! When you get to school, start to create your own 'family' by surrounding yourself with people who actually appreciate you for the preson you are. There are lots of on campus summer jobs, too, so check them out once you get comfortable on campus and you may never have to go home again. You can also establish yourself as legally independant. Someday, however, you may be able to look at your family objectively, and realize they did a crappy job as parents because THEIR parents were not so hot either. It does not mean you excuse their actions, but it may help you to understand them a little more and realize it has nothing to do with you or who you are. Never take the blame for any of their bad behavior. The tendancy to compulsive behavior, alcohol, drugs, etc, tends to be a genetic factor, so be extra careful yourself not to fall into the partying mode to escape the crap at home, or to cope in a new environment at school. Godspeed - you are amazing just the way you are!</p>
<p>Dukeletter, the wisdom and advice on this thread is excellent. This idea also might help: when you are the child, the adults have all the power and make decisions that you have little choice in. But now you are becoming the adult and you will finally have the power to chart the course of your life and create who you will be. It is a simple but empowering thought. Guilt can be overwhelming when you are the "normal" one in a dysfunctional situation. But you have a right to be sane and happy and whole. Claim the power to create the life you want in college and beyond. Best wishes!</p>
<p>Dukeletter,
I can relate. You have to remember that there's nothing wrong with dissociating yourself from toxic relatives. Friends are God's way of apologizing for your family. Also remember that even people who seem to have "perfect" families just may have problems you don't know about. Families are supposed to help each other. If yours is doing nothing but wearing you down, what's the point? Blood isn't always thicker than water. If your birth family is messed up, you can make a family of your own choosing.</p>
<p>It helps to be gentle with oneself too. We are often so hard on ourselves. This is a very challenging time as everyone waits to hear from schools -- and High school isn't over yet.
It's ok to just sit in the sunshine and take a break.</p>
<p>Alkassalam o alaikum,
hey,first of all i will like appreciate your deteremination and willpower that ggest that you should gorget about the past..or any thing of presrent that is happening bad becaude there is none of your fault. You should look ahead...a shining future awaits you brother...as soon as you feel that its the rite time to marry,do it..but sincerely...choose a partner for whole life.
If you ever need a friend,talk with me.</p>
<p>You can do it man! Do not give up!</p>
<p>I also recommend A Hope In The Unseen. My family situation, while not as bad as others, is pretty tough to deal with. Then I head to school to deal with kids that would be content with seeing me fail, in a community in which the things I'm passionate about are pretty much null and void. I have to search far and wide for things I'm passionate about, but it's really tough when you're fighting against a dysfunctional family, isolation at school, bullying, etc. Brown's my top choice also, so A Hope In The Unseen was like a godsend for me. I read it religiously whenever I feel at the end of my ropes. I'm on my fourth read as of right now. I can relate to Cedric's struggles in so many ways, and I hope to see myself one day in the same place as he is.</p>
<p>You should be very proud of how you've persevered. You sound wonderful, and all your hard work will pay off.</p>
<p>i totally understand. my hard work paid off in big ways as well, but now i’m in my town’s paper every other day and i have people coming up to me and asking me all these questions. and my fam is always talking about it and stuff so i feel kind of like a show pig.</p>
<p>it’s all cool i guess but i’m just not a very social kid and all the attention is draining.</p>
<p>i just used the fact that once i graduate i’ll get away from it all as motivation. keep your eye on the prize. within a few months you’ll have left all that behind and can be the person you really are</p>
<p>Congratulations, Banasandwich on your accomplishments. Warmest wishes as you prepare to go off to college.</p>
<p>Thank you :)</p>
<p>Yeah, you’ll be surprised at how many people have to go through family problems, childhood trauma, and school issues. We all have our share of pain but we get through it eventually and in the end when the battle is over, we truly are a better person if we followed through with the right decisions. Just know that there is someone out there that cares about you… you know, never give up ya.</p>
<p>move in with me because im going to NYU and i need an apartment mate</p>