UC Essay Topics?

College Essays
1

<p>Hello there! I'm a senior in high school currently trying to write my UC essays. I have a couple topic ideas for both prompts but I'm not which of them is possibly the best option, if any.</p>

<p>Prompt 1:</p>

<p>Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.</p>

<p>My ideas:
1. My love for chemistry. How AP Chem and my teacher helped me nurture that initial interest I had in chemistry into something more. (though I'm applying undecided since liking a high school subject is very different from liking a career in that subject) </p>

<ol>
<li><p>Talk about my tennis camp from prompt 2 but emphasize on how it sculpted the the idea of the type of person I aim to be.</p></li>
<li><p>How my mom's breast cancer diagnosis has inspired me to want to make important contributions to the cancer research field by possibly becoming a researcher. I want to do something important that helps work towards a breast cancer cure or that helps those with breast cancer or those who have had it previously.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>*i know a lot of people base this off of their major, since I'm applying undecided somewhat harder to do that even though I'll believe I'll end up in some sort of science</p>

<p>*im also not sure of any aspirations I have other than the general idea of going to a good college and then having a successful career, family, etc. I'm a type of person who takes on things as they come and I base my goals on whatever happens to come my way. </p>

<p>Prompt 2:</p>

<p>Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?</p>

<p>1.How being part of the summer tennis team for four years has made me who I am today. It's helped me develop many of my current traits and values. (There are a few possible different angles for this one: talk about why I'm proud of these traits and values I've developed on the team / talk about my team's accomplishment of qualifying and playing in a nationals tennis tournament)</p>

<ol>
<li>A story about how I'm open-minded. I have a friend who is often condemned by others for her behaviors and beliefs. She contemplated suicide and contributed me to saving her life by being open minded and willing to listen to her. (Were I to use this topic I would be careful to make sure I'm telling a story about me, not her, it'd just be a short example that actually shows how I'm open-minded)</li>
</ol>

<p>I'm not sure if any if these are decent ideas actually, I just want to know if I'm actual headed in the right direction and stuff. Thank you for your input!</p>

2

<p>Prompt 1: </p>

<p>I think it seems like you would have more to say about #3, but any of those ideas could be good essays. My advice: try writing all of them. If you’re having a hard time with one, scrap it. If one seems really easy to talk about and significant, go with that one. Think about whether you could really write an essay about it.</p>

<p>Prompt 2:</p>

<p>Again, both could be good. However, prompt 1 sounds more like an EC showcase and prompt 2 sounds like it would say more about you.</p>

3

<p>Do you think I should use for prompt 1 how my parents expertise in nutrition has inspired me to pursue a career in health sciences?</p>

<p>My parents educated me on nutrition which has helped me lose weight
I got the chance to inform my friends and relatives about nutrition which one relative took seriously and changed her life</p>

4

<p>Just quick tips on whatever you do:

  1. Start in the action. Put the reader as somebody in the audience. For example, “With palms on the sweat of my hands, I slowly pushed the door and entered a brand new atmosphere.” It’s better than saying, “I remember pushing the door and entering nervously.”
    2)Make sure that your focus is primarily you. Don’t go on a tangent.
    3)Use detail and imagery; try and avoiding “I’s.” Some is is okay but not a lot.</p>
5

<p>Another idea I had for prompt #2 is to write about how my parents never pushed me to succeed and preferred that I spend my nights partying with friends instead of doing homework. I actually did the opposite of what they wanted, but their lack of forcing me down a certain life path was essentially the foundation of my success. I would start out with a narrative story between me and my dad and then ease into my trait of being self-motivated. Would this be an okay topic or would it be too boring or overused? Thank you!</p>

6

<p>Your last idea for prompt 2 involves one of the most classic problems I see on this forum: focusing too much on your parents. I’m sure you could write a fine essay on being self-motivated, and it could even describe your interaction with your parents in the intro, but from the way you ask the question I get the sense that you might spend way too much precious essay 'real estate" on your parental interaction. Colleges are looking for independent adults. Make sure you come across as one.</p>

7

<p>Thanks for your input CHD2013. I asked a UC English teacher about my essays and their topics and she essentially said the same thing you did, that it could be a good essay as long as I focus on myself and not my parents. So I decided to try it while keeping your input in mind. I mostly just used my parents in the short intro to the actual idea of the essay like you suggested. Thanks!</p>

8

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</p>

<p>1) I disagree with this. The second sentence you provided cuts straight to the chase, the first involves contrived and overblown phrasing (aka pure Nebraska corn). Not to mention no one I know palms on the sweat of their hands! When I write exposition, I like to ask myself how I would tell the story to a room full of people. In fact, speak your essay aloud after you write it. You’ll instantly know if it’s overdramatic or, on the flipside, could use a bit more spice. </p>

<p>2) Agreed. </p>

<p>3) Agree on the detail and imagery, although again don’t provide details for the sake of providing details-- only provide details that are necessary to advance the story, the rest is no more than fluff. I disagree with your advice for the usage of “I”. This is a personal essay! I am not sure there is a more appropriate time to use the word “I”! </p>

<p>In short, don’t listen to left-handed people. They are the descendants of satan who palm on the sweat of their hands :)</p>