<p>Mombot, i'm pretty sure the OP won't be focusing on the SEX aspect of homosexuality, just on how being gay shaped the person he is today. There is a lot more to being gay than just having sex with the same sex. Maybe he will write about how he's reconciled something that the catholic church opposes with his devout faith, and how it made him a stronger catholic. I think it all depends on what he writes about.</p>
<p>Right, jojo--I get that it isn't about sexual behavior; it is about self-identify, but it would be like writing about your volunteer experience at Planned Parenthood. Tough to reconcile with the Church teachings and even tougher for an 18 year old to pull off.</p>
<p>I am not a big fan of putting ANYTHING in an essay that would raise the specter of "is this kid going to be high maintenance for us to deal with?" For that reason I would give the same advice (and I have) to kids asking whether they should write about their struggles with depression, bipolar, eating disorders, or chronic physical illness/disability.</p>
<p>Think of the essay as a one way job interview. Would you disclose your sexual orientation to your prospective employer? No, you would not unless maybe you were interviewing for a paid position in an LGBT advocacy organization. </p>
<p>I want to stress that I do not believe there is anything "disordered" about being gay--it is what, 5-10% of the population? I have to believe that is is a normal variation, like left-handedness. The Church teaches that homosexual sex is wrong, and I get that, just like I get that married sex is wrong if one or both parties is not open to the idea of conception. Do I think that the Church's teachings on sexuality are workable in the real world? Uh...not really, but the older I get and the more damage I see from premature or careless sexual entanglements the more I understand why they teach what they teach. IMO they set the standard so high it is only the few, the proud who are going to measure up..but they do that with just about everything if you think about it. The Church teachings on the sharing of resources with the poor are also very hard to achieve. Does that mean we should quit trying?</p>
<p>Actually, I disclosed my sexual orientation to my employer this summer before i was employed. And it wasn't at a LGBT organization, but I knew that there were other out people at the office. It all depends on the situation, the non-discrimination statement, and what kind of vibe you get from that place. For that reason, Notre Dame might not be the best place to do that for, but if he gets rejected because of that essay, then the administration probably wouldn't help if he was harassed by students, so he probably shouldn't be going there anyway.</p>
<p>OP, do what is in your heart. I know that sounds cliche, but in the end it is YOUR essay, YOUR acceptance, and YOUR life. If you don't write an essay that you wanted to and you wish you'd had, you will be mad at yourself. Don't write what someone else wants, do what defines you. They will accept or deny you based on who YOU are, not some random poster (aka all of us) on a college website. If you want to talk about being gay, do it. If you are hesitant, don't. Either way, be confident with your decision.</p>
<p>Right. And with that said, I have to caution all applicants not to be naive about essays. There seems to be a culture of oversharing, where some kids are given IMO frankly bad advice about what is appropriate in a college essay. I am suspicious that adcoms at highly selective schools encourage kids to write about things that frankly disqualify them. Kids seem to take the bait because of the whole Dr. Phil/Oprah culture.</p>
<p>You do NOT have to make your life an open book to these people--your job is to sell yourself; their job is to screen. Don't think that you aren't making their jobs easier by picking essay topics that can open you up to criticism, even if the criticism is unjustified.</p>
<p>"If you don't write an essay that you wanted to and you wish you'd had, you will be mad at yourself."</p>
<p>A college application essay is not a diary entry. It's not a Facebook profile. It's not a blog post. And it's not a confession. It's information you are providing the admissions team in order to help them decide to accept you.</p>
<p>clarmarie: I'm not sure where I said it was a facebook profile. I'm not that stupid, obviously it isn't. I think you'd be surprised to find out who really gets accepted beyond the "2300 SAT/captain of a varsity sports team" stereotype. My aunt is an admissions officer for Princeton, and it is not only rich kids with nice cars who get accepted, even if that may be the majority. She has some amazing stories about who has, and hasn't, gotten in. I'm simply telling the OP to write what he wants, because in the end, none of us, including yourself, know exactly what they are looking for. Essays don't have a set formula for what's write or wrong, though I wouldn't advise someone to write about being a serial killer, for example. For every kid who did right a "safe" essay and get accepted, I can guarantee that someone else wrote what might be considered a risky one and got in as well. I think in the end it really all depends on how the OP expresses his homosexuality. I would not advise him to write about it in a sexual manner, but I don't think that was his intention in the first place. Perhaps he has learned a lot about discrimination or acceptance through it, in which it might end up being a brilliant essay.</p>
<p>mombot: can you expand on this sentence: "I am suspicious that adcoms at highly selective schools encourage kids to write about things that frankly disqualify them."</p>
<p>not because i don't believe you, but because I feel that it might help me in my own essays. thanks.</p>
<p>I think that essay topics such as ones discussing how the student "overcame adversity" are misinterpreted by naive 18 year olds and/or some students grab onto the concept that their essay somehow has to contain those elements. For middle class kids, that means finding adversity in normal life or family dysfunction, since it is not often a middle class suburban kid can tell a tale of living in a car, growing up in a migrant farm family, escaping from a war-torn country or overcoming grave physical injuries or illness. </p>
<p>For example, one of MIT's prompts last year asked students to write about an experience of failure or disappointment serious enough that thought their life had come to an end. I can assure you that some applicants probably walked right into the trap and wrote about struggles with chronic physical or mental illness. </p>
<p>So now you have a situation where the admissions people have roughly 10 times as many applicants as slots, and they also know that SOME of the applicants are dealing with, say, depression. Do they want to take that kid KNOWING full well how stressful it is adjusting to college, let alone the demands of a place like MIT when for each mental health or ADHD/LD essay they have three or four essays that don't reveal this type of condition from qualified applicants? I would bet good money the essays that hint at high-maintenance students get tossed.</p>
<p>When you are writing essays, just remember that colleges do NOT have time to handhold or look after students who can't handle the realities of college life: community living, academic demands, not a lot of individual attention, and a wide-open social life generally free from adult supervision. I do not think admissions offices use this information to be mean, I think there is a genuine desire to see kids be successful in college, and adcoms know that kids starting out with difficulties like depression or family instability are less likely to withstand the stresses of college life.</p>
<p>Amen, Mombot. You are right on the money!</p>