<p>loved your post, college 282…hilarious! Really made me giggle:)</p>
<p>This isn’t a weird or bad or backwards question. When I was looking at Brown I had read in some review book that it had a terrible dating scene. I asked the tour guides if it was true and it seemed like they were genuinely surprised by the question. They said, if I remember correctly, that basically none of them really had any friends who were dating… but they also didn’t have friends who wanted to date. They shrugged.</p>
<p>Carolina is similar to that. Some people are trying to date… and do date. I actually know a ton of people who go out on dinner dates all the time but who aren’t consistently really with anyone. It feels like this is an in-between period for most people. Pretty much every single person I know had a serious boyfriend or girlfriend in high school and college was a welcome break.</p>
<p>I’ve been dating someone who I met through a club sport. Clubs seem to be where pretty much everyone who is dating found their respective boos.</p>
<p>The overwhelming majority of guys here definitely aren’t predators if you’re afraid of that. Nor are they jerks. They’re just doin’ their thang and dating isn’t a top priority. The same goes for the ladies. No worries. Freshman year is more about making twenty million new friends and trying to remember all of their names. It’s the rare bird that chooses to go off and date someone during it.</p>
<p>^ It’s true that there doesn’t seem to be that much dating at UNC-CH… but how much do you think that is because of a shortage of eligible men? Maybe people would date more if there was more chance to do it, and less of a ‘hookup culture’ where the men have all the power.</p>
<p>At my previous college, which had a roughly 50/50 sex split, dating was extremely common, much more so than here. (And there was significantly more academic pressure and competition, so that wasn’t the reason).</p>
<p>Speaking as a male, I never had trouble dating at Carolina. Although my dating experience thus far consists of a girlfriend from high school that I dated for over 3 years, 2 of them during college, and another girl this year for over 5 months. </p>
<p>As far as my friends that are girls go, I’ve gotten a range of answers. A lot are incredibly busy people that don’t even want to think about the time commitment of finding a guy. Others have expressed that they wished there were more guys on campus. Ironically, a few of my best friends that said that found a guy within a week. I wouldn’t say the dating scene here is absolutely terrible. If you want to date someone, it can happen, although it can be more difficult as a girl.</p>
<p>A “hook-up” scene does exist here, but you don’t have to be a part of it, and I dare you to find a top school that doesn’t have a hook-up culture present.</p>
<p>I suppose the problem isn’t that there is a hookup scene. Hooking up is fun!</p>
<p>But for a lot of girls at UNC-CH, it seems like that’s there’s no alternative to hooking up, because of the shortage of men. To exaggerate, if there aren’t many dates to be had then it’s hook up or celibacy.</p>
<p>And about people in college not being interested in dating… I’m not sure I buy it for all these people. It’s kind of a shame. College is the time when you most meet a wide variety of people of both sexes. From what I hear, it gets a lot harder to meet people once you get a job.</p>
<p>Oh and of course you’ve never had trouble as a guy dating at UNC-CH! The numbers are in your favour.</p>
<p>DS definitely does NOT want a hook-up culture. I hope there’s room at Carolina for a guy like him: Catholic, good-looking (if I do say so), a bit bohemian, and very interested in finding what he calls a “nerdy girl” (i.e., smart and interesting).</p>
<p>(LOL, sounds like I’m writing a personal ad. DS would have a fit if he knew I was writing this!)</p>
<p>If he really does want a relationship and he is as you say, then he will be fighting them off with a stick.</p>
<p>There are almost (not quite) two girls for every guy at UNC-CH. And since there are more gay guys than lesbian women, the numbers are even more favourable than that.</p>
<p>Of course, I think the whole imbalance is as degrading for men as it is for women. Not that I know what to do about it. But, your son shouldn’t have any problem finding a nice girlfriend.</p>
<p>I’m glad you asked this because I got into UNC as well and am definitely concerned about the girl to guy ratio.</p>
<p>I embrace the hook-up culture because when I’m single I definitely want to get with guys. Celibacy is not for me.
However, knowing myself I know that ultimately I (and probably most girls) want a meaningful relationship with a good guy. I hope that’s not too much to ask for at UNC.</p>
<p>I have a question (not too off-topic). Does the hook-up scene consist mostly of random drunken hook-ups at frat parties…or do a lot of students have friends-with-benefits that they regularly have casual sex with?</p>
<p>thanks for all the input. I guess I wasn’t really thinking about a serious relationship freshman year, just looking more at over the four years i’ll be in college.</p>
<p>This thread has gone from the girl-to-guy ratio to dating to having casual sex with drunk people at frat parties… Y’all move fast.</p>
<p>OK, this mom is starting to get seriously freaked out. :o</p>
<p>ladydianeski should chill out. if he’s the one who told you he didnt want a hook up scene, hes probably just lying. let him do what he wants and have all the drunken casual sex he wants.</p>
<p>^As brash as that sounds, I really can’t disagree with that. College is about experiencing the best of both worlds: a great education and FUN, which is attained through new found independence. Ima be honest and say that I haven’t had my first kiss yet, mostly due to my focus in school, but you better believe I’m goin all out in college to make up for lost opportunities. </p>
<p>I guarantee if a parent restrains a child’s independence in college he/she will only move farther and farther away as a result of tension. So I would recommend to any parents out there to accept the fact that your child may hook up and/or have casual sex as early as possible so both parties are happy!</p>
<p>Just my 2 cents haha</p>
<p>^Totalllly agree with you both! Parents need to stop kidding themselves…“Oh my DD/DS isn’t like that!” hahaha yeah right =] You go all out in college making up for lost opportunities golfer, I’ll be right there with ya! So many of us were focused in high school and are ready for more balanced lives in college.</p>
<p>Let’s not be dicks about this.</p>
<p>There are lots of chaste, Christian men and women in college. Rather fewer at the end of college than at the start of course, but lots of people do hold on to their values.</p>
<p>keepittoyourself, thanks for the post. Things were getting embarassing…</p>
<p>The majority of people I met freshman year kept things in check (and had some self-respect)- it’s fine to go out and party and have that experience, but I think it loses its appeal after a couple of weeks. Also, homework and studying really pick up about a month into every semester so you can’t keep up the party lifestyle forever. Generally people are going to stop wanting to hang out with you if you are a sloppy, drunk person who tries to sleep around all the time… that’s just tragic and a total downer.</p>
<p>My boyfriend is a Tarheel (sorry ladies…one fewer man :)), and his roommate–not the most attractive fella, in my opinon–has never had trouble hooking up with girls. There does seem to be a bit of desperation on the female end that you don’t see from the guys–ie, a guy would never hookup with someone less attractive, but the girls would, easily. Just an observation.</p>
<p>@keepittoyourself. You’re right, but my sister (a current Senior at UNC) always laments that those type of people aren’t getting the college experiences because of their steadfast beliefs. She was on a sports team in which there were a few girls who were “good Christian girls” and brought down the moods at social get togethers for simply not branching out.</p>
<p>College is about CHANGE, FREEDOM, and FUN, as well as EDUCATION. It’s foolish to believe or force your child to believe that these choices are “wrong”. They are to be kept in moderation, of course.</p>
<p>Meta- that is totally a valid opinion for what you think college is about, but saying it is “foolish” to not share those beliefs might be coming on to a little bit too strong. I would argue that a much larger part of part of college would be meeting people with different ideals and values from your own, and getting to know them beyond a superficial level.</p>
<p>As far as those girls bringing parties down, I honestly kind of lament that there are so many college student, both here and around the US think the only way to have fun is bust out the booze and try to let loose. Now that might be coming on a little strong too (:-P), but I can say I still have fun at those parties without drinking or hooking up.</p>
<p>Thank you, Packerfan. I have to admit I’m rooting for the Steelers, but I still say – thank you, Packerfan! (And keepittoyourself and jambaby, too). :)</p>