<p>I'm an undergrad (obviously) serving what is basically my senior year of high school as a freshman at UCB (graduated early). I'm having a lot of issues with a parent regarding my freedom as a student -
1. I plan to move out of the dorms next year into an apartment or co-op - I turn 18 a week after the fall semester begins; how do I do this with or without their consent (which I may or may not receive when the time comes)?
2. Can my parents control whether or not I attend summer session or get a job on campus, two things they object to? Work-study was in my financial aid plan.</p>
<p>Are you paying for college without their assistance? If so, once you are an adult, you don’t really need them for anything. If not, you might want to find a peaceful compromise to this situation. I don’t believe that they need to be involved with your housing choices. The only exception would be if you rent an apartment, you may need to have their name on the lease. This is quite common with college aged students. As far as work study, they do not have any control over that. It can be more challenging to find a job as a 17 year old though. They would not have any say on your attending summer session unless they are paying for it. I feel that if they are paying for your education, you should allow them to have some input in your decisions.</p>
<p>I have a son who was 17 when he started in the fall (not as young as you, but still on the young side.) I hope that you can find a way to talk to your parents and reach a compromise. The best solution for all of this is for everyone to be on the same page. It is never the best option to be at war with your parents. I do hope you work things out.</p>
<p>Like momfirst3, their control over you depends on whether they’re supporting you financially. Beyond that, they have no control over what you do regarding school. Be aware that I think most apartment leases require some kind of cosigner.</p>
<p>Also, your parents wouldn’t even be able to know whether you have a work-study job or not, if you don’t tell them.</p>
<p>Technically speaking, you can break away from your parents once you turn 18, but it’s not necessarily a wise idea to do so.</p>
<p>You should be asking yourself why you want to have an on-campus job, attend summer sessions, or live outside the dorms. Once you answer that, figure out why your parents would also want it.</p>
<p>I also happened to want the same things, and after figuring that out, I talked to my parents and got my way. Here’s what I figured:</p>
<p>1.) I wanted a job so I can have both work experience and the money I want to have a little fun. My parents would like that because that means I ask for less money from them. HOwever, the caveat here is that they only approve of a job that pays extremely well (eg. >$15/hr) because otherwise, they’d prefer me to spend my time learning. If I went the learning route, they’re going to be supporting it, which means I get the money anyways.</p>
<p>2.) Summer courses: well, they’re a way to get ahead. My parents wanted me to go to college so that I can get a good education while experiencing college life. I worked it out with them that because of prerequisite requirements, my educational experience would be the smoothest if I take summer sessions. After I told them that if I simply took the summer off, I’d just be wasting their resources for no gain, they approved of the summer sessions.</p>
<p>3.) I wanted out of the dorms because I really prefer a place where I can learn to cook, study whenever I wanted to (inc’l 4am), and be far away from the influence of campus so I can relax once classes are over. After showing my parents how I’d live three times more comfortably in an apartment at approximately half the cost (vs the dorms), it didn’t take me too long to convince them. “Hey mom and dad, would you like an extra $3000 per year?”</p>
<p>I made my presentation, made them <em>want</em> to do things my way, and we’re both happy. Plus, working this out has allowed them to trust me more, which allows me to get more from them. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship, and even though I have the right and ability to cut them off at any point I want to, I’m having the benefits of both sides by having a great relationship with my parents.</p>
<p>For number 2, the only way your parents can make you get a job is if they threaten to cut off your tuition. As for summer sessions, I don’t see how they could make you do it… They shouldn’t have any access to your class schedule unless you gave them your cal net id and password.</p>