<p>Sorry OMom. Any kid who applies to her ED school has ALOT on the ball and she will do well wherever she ends up (although too painful now to even think about, I’m sure).</p>
<p>O-mom:</p>
<p>Wow, so sorry to hear this. I know this is not what you want to hear but it’s the same thing I said to mommyg…your S will find another school that he falls in love with and will forge ahead and not look back. I know it’s crushing news when people around you are celebrating, but you too will have your turn to celebrate, it may just take a bit longer.</p>
<p>Good luck. Let us know where he gets in and decides to go to! :)</p>
<p>mommyg: if your S is artsy, did you check out Weslayen in Connecticut?? Or Skidmore??</p>
<p>I sincerely wish the both of your families all the best in the coming weeks with much more positive news to report!!</p>
<p>Oops O-mom:</p>
<p>I mean D, not S. Sorry! :)</p>
<p>thank you guys =) haha i appreciate it. don’t worry, i’m not that sad lol. well, i actually cried when i typed that, but it’s ok now. my friend like baked me cookies on friday and i got a lot of nice warm congrats from friends xD</p>
<p>OMom - I feel for you and your child. Hopefully she will find her place at her next choice. </p>
<p>This weekend seems to be never ending…waiting for a call Monday for ED and where I was fairly positive for a good outcome the longer this goes on the more I second guess! It’s not even me that’s going! Just let it be over already!</p>
<p>Sorry to vent…I can’t say a word in front of DD! She is stressing which makes her cranky and is convinced she is going to be rejected! Of course it didn’t help that said #1 choice sent a THIN envelope today telling her they were so excited to hear she was interested in their Music Department!!! Don’t they know we are WAITING!!! (and are SO not patient people!)</p>
<p>^^ That letter is a very good sign, happy64!</p>
<p>omom: I am really sorry to hear your news. How is she doing? I’m glad it’s the weekend at least. I wish all schools notified on the weekend so that the kids had some private time to deal with their news. As ccc has said, you guys will definitely have your turn to celebrate.</p>
<p>happy64: the letter sounds like a very good sign! Patience is not my virtue either.</p>
<p>Good luck to everyone who will get the decisions this week!</p>
<p>Remember even though this is a difficult time; things turn out for the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out.</p>
<p>Omom-So sorry to hear. I am confident that things will turn out for the best, but at this point it is just painful. Hugs to you and D.</p>
<p>I also want to offer my condolences to those parents whose kids were not admitted. I remember the sting in our house two years ago as the results came in. It is hard for the student, hard for the parent - just all around difficult because you care, and they care, and some of them have worked so hard. And, it is particularly difficult because the admissions results seem so RANDOM. Kids with great grades, great SATs, schedules we parents could not keep up with - it seems non-sensical, even when we try to take off our biased parent-lens and look at the situation. Who would not want a 1400+, 4.0 Student, with 20+ hours weekly of various ECs and awards too? In the pool of applicants, though, these kids are average - in the pool of life, they sure are not…</p>
<p>A warm blanket, hot drinks, and a fire. Hugs too.</p>
<p>Omom, mommyg and anyone else dealing with disapointing results: I hope your kids are feeling a little bit better today. As anothermom says above, the decisions are very random. It’s really hard for kids who have done everything right to deal with this. I’m sure that they will have some great options down the road. </p>
<p>Good luck to those who are expecting results this week. I’m sure this has been a very long weekend.</p>
<p>Just want to add my support to those dealing with DE disappointment. Two years ago at this time - S1 was deferred ED from Duke. He was a very high stat kid - including 8 APs, straight A’s and a 34 ACT. Lots of community service and great ECs. And a stellar alumni interview. As momjr wrote - he did everything right - there was no shortcoming that we could see. It was a very devastating experience.</p>
<p>He was accepted at several other great schools and is very happy at his present university, which in some ways is actually a better fit for him than Duke would have been. My takeaway from this experience is that applying ED at a super competitive school is always a pie-in-the-sky reach. If it works out great - but if it doesn’t - it’s not your fault - they just have too many qualified applicants for too few spots. If you are deferred - just take that as a compliment of sorts - but do your best to move on emotionally and focus on your other schools. Don’t waste time picking at yourself and looking for hidden flaws - don’t second guess your essay - don’t beat yourself up - let it go.</p>
<p>It took a few months for me to really gain perspective on it - but my son is just fine. So - reassure your kids - and reassure yourselves - that they will have great college options to choose from - and that it will all work out by April, if not sooner.</p>
<p>Thanks rockmom, as my hair becomes grayer and grayer while waiting for results next week, I really appreciate hearing from parents who have been through this before and lived to tell about it. ;)</p>
<p>Thank you, everyone, for the kind words. D is feeling slightly better today, and has gained a little perspective on the situation. She decided to add a few more reach schools to her list in the hopes of getting into one of them. She also dropped one that has a very low acceptance rate for a special program she was interested in. Hopefully she will have some good choices in April, but at the same time, I am trying to convince her not to poo-poo her match & safeties. We have them for a reason!</p>
<p>Good luck to all of you expecting results this week. I will be back to cheer you on, congratulate, and/or commiserate.</p>
<p>as always, rockvillemom hit the nail on the head. It’s not about fault or what we could have done differently, so there’s no sense in scrutinizing the past. I’m pretty confident that all of these kids are appealing applicants, so it’s just a matter of finessing the list. If there’s one thing I learned early on from the class of 2011 thread, it’s “love thy safety.” I talked about the safety so much I think it appeared to be my number one choice for him. I also always tried to point out that if his ED didn’t work out, that actually freed him up to apply to other schools that he really liked a lot. You just never know what’s going to click from one school to another.
I hope that as the days go on, your D continues to feel better.</p>
<p>“And, it is particularly difficult because the admissions results seem so RANDOM. Kids with great grades, great SATs, schedules we parents could not keep up with - it seems non-sensical, even when we try to take off our biased parent-lens and look at the situation. Who would not want a 1400+, 4.0 Student, with 20+ hours weekly of various ECs and awards too? In the pool of applicants, though, these kids are average - in the pool of life, they sure are not…”</p>
<p>Very well said. I feel like we hit the jackpot here (and am still in a state of shock), but I am VERY aware that that was a jackpot and that kids just as qualified, if not more, than my own certainly got turned down. I wish all of you the very best of luck.</p>
<p>Some of you know the rest of our Duke story - but for those who don’t - you may find this of interest.</p>
<p>After S1 was deferred by Duke in the ED round, and then rejected in the RD round - he really struggled to let go of his dream of attending Duke - something he had worked towards throughout hs. By early April - he had acceptances from Michigan, William & Mary and Wake Forest and was moving on. He attended accepted students days at the 3 schools and was really making progress at being happy with his options.</p>
<p>Then, around April 10th - he rcvd an e-mail from the regional rep at Duke, basically congratulating him on his acceptance and asking him to contact her if he had any questions as he made his decision. He forwarded the e-mail to be, basically saying “***!”</p>
<p>I agreed with his sentiment and called the regional rep at Duke. She seemed flabbergasted - so I forwarded the e-mail to her. She put me on hold for quite a while and then came back to the phone full of apologies - it was a computer error - a coding error - it was a mistake - he was not admitted - she was sorry. I lost it. I mean I completely lost it. I think 3+ months of stress just came roaring out of me as I could not believe that having rejected my son twice - Duke needed to kick him in the gut a 3rd time. Interestingly enough, she admitted that it was not a massive mistake affecting hundreds of students - just my son - leading me to believe that maybe he was on the acceptance list at some point in the process.</p>
<p>Anyway, the next day I called her back and apologized and we had a good chat. She was truly very apologetic and I know it probably was not her fault anyway and we all make mistakes. Once again, S1 moved on.</p>
<p>The lesson I learned from this was that I was way too emotionally invested in my son’s college process. Parents should be the calm voice of reason - not the raving lunatic. So - that is my goal for S2. Whether he applies ED anywhere or not - I know he will have acceptances to choose from and I know it will all be fine in the end. I’m trying to keep the process a fun exploration and making sure that both of us keep our expectations reasonable and rational. I’ll let you know how that goes in a year!</p>
<p>OMG…and no, I didn’t know that story; can’t say I wouldn’t have reacted the same way…</p>
<p>that definitely beats some of the other bizarre admissions stories I have heard (and personally experienced) around here…</p>
<p>Wow rockvillemom, what a saga! I’m glad your son ended up content with his college choice in the end. My goal at this point is similar to yours. She will apply where she applies and get in where she gets in. Let the chips fall as they may, and hopefully she will have some good choices in April. The planner in me really dislikes this - because we will have to fly out on a moment’s notice to visit who-knows-which schools, all of which are clear across the country. But que sera sera. It will all work out in the end, I’m sure of it.</p>
<p>rockvillemom, that is one of the worst stories I have heard! I don’t blame you for blowing up, and admire your perspective within 24 hours. I mentioned before that my son was rejected at his ED school and it still pains me, even though he ended up at a better place that we would not have envisioned. So as another piece of advice, even though it is late, possibly consider taking another turn through the college guide book and see if there is anywhere to add (especially among Jan 15 deadline schools.) For us at least, it is distracting and also encouraging to see all the places where the scores match. Our son applied at a few more reaches (fortunately he had gotten into reasonable match/safeties EA) and ended up getting in to 1-2. He didn’t get into where he thought he really wanted, but in the end, after traveling around (and that was fun!) to accepted student events, decided on a low reach that we hadn’t really looked at until the ED rejection. And it is likely a better place – but we missed it the first time around.</p>