What gets YOU motivated?

<p>Here's a big sister who can't figure out the secret to get her little brother motivated to follow through with his statements (easier said than done). Right now we're both rising juniors (me in college, him in high school). We are so different in every way- I'm very highly motivated and tend to stick with things tough as things get. I really have to work hard to get the grades I want because I'm not THAT bright. My brother, on the other hand, is really bright but absolutely lazy. He does try but just isn't performing what he's capable of. He scores ridiculously high on standardized tests (so we're looking at lopsided numbers here with his GPA). He used to be a child prodigy in my parents and grandmother's eyes but he did a 180 somewhere in middle school.</p>

<p>My parents have tried incentives to motivate him to get the grades he should be getting (ipod, etc) but they failed. My dad gave up trying talking to him shortly at the beginning of high school. My mom gave up last fall and now it's up to me to keep him on the course. The three of us know that he needs to be the one in charge of his future and we're just guiding him along with frank talks.</p>

<p>Right now, his course schedule for his junior year is fine with me- 2 APs, a writing class, and other typical junior year classes. But I just recently heard that he flunked his final exam in honors math and he said that he just didn't do well. It sounded like he didn't care. I know, what's past is past but I'm starting to doubt him. It does help that I give him a zing every once in a while but they don't last for long and I can't keep doing it forever. He just doesn't have the natural drive as I do so I can't understand what it must be like to be coasting along like that without care.</p>

<p>He does want to go to college like BU or Northeastern but they're getting very competitive. He doesn't want to go to our local CC or a well-matched school (considered to be my safeties) and transfer up to a better school. He wants to stay put.</p>

<p>He loves to spend his free time playing golf and hockey, video games, and watching TV. He's also working this summer for 20 hours a week. He plays hockey 4-5 times a week from September to March and then plays a spring sport. As much my parent support him with his pre-season hockey league but they just think it's just too much. He doesn't want to give it up because it helps him to relax. He doesn't do any other ECs.</p>

<p>So for those of you who were/are like him- how do you deal with your academics and the college process when your parents don't want to push you anymore? Especially when your actions drove your parents crazy with concerns and worries that you're not going anywhere with your GPA. How can I convince him that he's very likely to be accepted at different schools than on his list?</p>

<p>Yeah, looks like he needs to do some tough love- but what's the ideal level without destroying his future?</p>

<p>I really appreciate any answers/response to my dilemma... just help me relate here :)</p>

<p>Competition worked for me. I was always kind of motivated but I ussually have the best grade in a class when I'm trying to beat someone else. I would think that he would want to try to get better grades than you did. I don't know if it's good for him to think like that but it works.</p>

<p>My brother is exactly like this. </p>

<p>My parents have tried a lot of things, and seems that theres nothing much else to do. But since he's already intelligent, you can be assured he'll get somewhere in life. They always do, even if they don't give a damn about school. They'll figure out what works with them. Take away something he's really attached to, and tell him that if he makes As, he can get it back. A video game maybe. And if you really want to make sure he does, keep up with his assignments via the school, ask him gently if he turned it in, etc. Sometimes you have to be the student with him if you want him to do as well as you did. good luck. i think parents will be able to help you more with this issue though, because as mentioned in the post above, competition won't work if he doesn't care to begin with. also, they have to work directly with unmotivated kids, whether their own or their students, if they happen to be a teacher.</p>